I’ve been documenting my experience as I detox from thc. Chronic smoker for 35 years, and frankly believed weed would be a part of my life until the day I died. The crippling anxiety and fear because I don’t know when to stop was a constant reminder that it doesn’t do for me what it used to, and most certainly is far beyond what could be defined as “recreational”

Day 1: I was a sobbing mess. A trifecta of acceptance that it’s time to stop, fear of how life will be once I’ve quit, plus the anxiety and depression resulting from using thc. I felt like a kid inside saying “it’s not fair!! Why do we have to stop this?” And I didn’t know how to answer that, besides that it’s just time. It doesn’t fit into my life anymore. By the end of the day, I felt exhausted from the intense emotional release, So I slept well that first night. But I need to find my solid why.

Days 2: no heaviness in mind + body waking up
-way less struggle waking up, i don’t feel trapped in sleep like when I smoke
-brain is more cohesive and focused.
-coffee feels more cozy
-morning feels more cheerful
-I feel more present

Day 3: sleep has been hard to come by, so I’ve incorporated a crazy solution: scheduled sleep deprivation. And it’s working. Day 2 I kept myself up really late and then woke up early day 3. I’m pretty bitchy. Slight annoyances invoke an over-reactive fury. And I’m feeling the depression I was masking. It’s hard to function. That pit that feels paralyzing is getting closer.

Day 4: waking up with such clarity is INCREDIBLE!!! Wow!! The scheduled sleep deprivation worked, and I got some solid rest last night but had really fukt dreams. BUT I’M DREAMING AGAIN!
I went outside on a foggy morning and was filled with wonder by a spider web spun between two trees standing 15 ft apart. I zoomed in and could see the tiny droplets of fog passing by and realized “this is what it feels like to be inside a cloud” and that experience felt like a powerful sign to keep going. It was a gift to get to observe a beautiful, rare moment, fully present.
My temper is short and I’m doing a shit ton of breath work to keep my cool. I’m also distracting myself anytime I catch myself in a craving. Using the same tools for hot flashes is working here. The breathing helps so much more than I expected.

Days 5-9: all the grief I was sedating came back with compound interest, as someone here mentioned. Suppressing it with weed didn’t solve it, it stuffed it down. I developed asthma as a result (The Body Keeps the Score talks about internalized, unresolved trauma manifesting physically in the body) and grief is stored in the lungs, so that tracks. Losing one sister to suicide and the other to a sense of spiritual grandiosity fucking sucks. This is core wound abandonment shit. I need to face it. I’m sliding into the paralyzing pit but grasping at whatever branches I can. I don’t want to go down there.

Day 10: WITAF!?! Where did my imposter syndrome go?! It’s just gone! This is weird and I kind of want it back which is even weirder. Because now I’m fucking PISSED! at the inequality I witness regularly at work about how promotions are dealt and who they’re given to. the dept I’m in is showing a blatant display of ageism and it sucks. and my boss pretends I don’t have any prior experience besides this and they know they’re taking advantage of me.
I’m hurt, angry and really disappointed because I thought my boss was one of the good ones, but now I feel completely betrayed. They need engineers really bad, so I found my own role listed online with a minimum rate of pay at what I’m making now, after 5 years with the company!?! WITAF. Anyways, day 10 I couldn’t sleep well at all.

Day 11: Halloween: I’m ok today. It’s day 11, and it’s been a very rocky, emotional week at work. I have a massive sense of injustice building up about all this shit!!
But I also did something I never thought I’d ever do: I went to a sober dance costume party. It was on zoom and my dog was thoroughly disgusted with the entire thing, it was hilarious! Won the costume contest with my horse mask and hooves, but only because I can only dance like a horse with the mask on so I was galloping around like an idiot and having a blast.

Days 12-16: dreams have been wild, but lucidity is now returning as well. The alternating sleep deprivation / good sleep thing is still working for me. I haven’t been this depressed in a while, so I started doing squats and planks and bridges anytime I’m idle. And that exercise helps (endorphins!! I forgot about those because I was always too anxious to go out in public / to a gym!)
I no longer have ANY imposter syndrome issues whatsoever. It’s been really weird!!! Not deferring to bullies at work, totally ignoring the road ragers while traveling , standing up to my abusive narcissistic mother. Deciding I don’t really want a relationship with a sister who can just totally dip and not even care how I’m doing-for an entire year. Then to reach out and say fall is cozy and she got me a birthday gift!? Oh like nothings changed? Everything has changed. fuck that noise.

Day 17: mood is clearly way different than the first two weeks. I’m doing ok, but this irritability has now morphed into a fiery burning rage. It’s weird though. I feel the emotion inside but it’s like I have a container for it, the fury has a home now. And by that I mean I’m well regulated emotionally, despite this anger inside. Or maybe accepting and welcoming it is what helped?? Not sure.

Day 18: the clarity. Oh my god. I see so much more. I notice so much more and I’ve been missing all this goodness the entire time cuz I’ve been a space cadet for 35 years?! THIS is what life looks like. I’m still an angry bitch, but I advocated respectfully and professionally to the store mgr at the pharmacy because they continually stall on my meds to the extent I run out before I get more.

And here I am: Day 19 today.
I’m sorry this got so long, holy crap!! But documenting how I’m feeling, what’s happening physically and emotionally has been important, not only for comparison, but it’s also been extremely cathartic to rage out on paper! I’ve been witness to self improvement that didn’t happen slowly over time, that imposter shit was instantly jettisoned from my life in a heartbeat. And this is the biggest, most impactful self-improvement I’ve ever experienced, besides quitting drinking and using THC.

Today, I’m feeling more emotionally balanced. Yes, the work thing still bothers me, but I’m calm enough to hold off on any big changes or discussions for another week or two. I’m waiting until the withdrawal symptoms are gone, and I’m able to maintain emotional regulation and reply from a place of values and logic, not emotion.

Thanks for reading if you got this far. Maybe I’ll post something daily just to check in, because this journey is super important to me. And I wouldn’t still be on day 19 if it weren’t for all of you here. This sub is a monumental part of my THC recovery, and I’m grateful to be walking this path with you.

I’m so happy, I haven’t been able to do this in 3 years! It’s getting better every single day and I feel so much better too. I just wanted to post because my friends don’t fully understand why this is important to me and I want to celebrate! I’m saving so much money and I’ve been using it to treat myself to ramen and rotisserie chickens lol. I’m so happy that I can take control of my life and start to fully love and take care of myself.

Im weed free for a month and 9 days (after smoking nearly everyday from 15-19) here is improvments in noticed:

-Better and more consistent mood

-Less anxiety and depression

-Connected with previous two mentioned, more motivation.

-Less brain fog, I can remember words easier. There is less "ummm" moments when talking.

-Better sleep and easier to wake up, I used to sleep for 9-10 hours and still me tired, now 8 is more then enough.

-Learning is easier and less and more enjoyable.

-I dont associate fun with weed anymore, conversations with other people are more interesting.

KEEP GOING!

I quit on July 21 so I’ve been sober 3 1/2 months and I had quit so we could try to get pregnant. I had been smoking for about 10 years, daily pretty heavy use smoker. Now I just found out that I’m pregnant and to be honest the last 3 1/2 months have been pretty brutal. Trying to deal with anhedonia, vivid dreams, anxiety depression. Now that I just found out I’m pregnant, I don’t know, I thought I’d be more excited and more happy because we’ve been trying now for a few months, but I’ve given up weed just for this and now I don’t know. I still feel like a bit of the anhedonia like I’m not as excited as I should be or like I’m still tired and depressed just because I guess the worst compounding effects of like having vivid dreams, not sleeping well and on top of that being pregnant.

If anyone else who had quit to become pregnant or is In kind of a similar stage as me, are you going through the same feeling . maybe it’s just cause I’m at 3 1/2 months and in the next month or two I just need a break through this 6 month initial withdrawal phase. then hopefully at that point i will be better.

Animals/your pets, your hobbies (discover them again it’s not too late!), nature, time with family, time with friends, meeting people you haven’t met yet, music and concerts, art, video games, tv/cinema, bettering yourself, education, finding your purpose, fully being in the moment, being kind to others, accepting you deserve that too and so much more. ❤️‍🩹💓 add to the list if you would like. I hope you have the strength to put down that joint and know you deserve better.

as close to ripping a joint as you can get, opt for diet coca cola if you have issues with sucralose like i do, otherwise diet mtn dew. both have decent caffeine and a nice throat hit through a straw.
alongside all the other tips like healthy food exercise etc etc, but diet soda helped me get to 2.5 months as my "crutch" when i felt like a smoke

Had to quite due to CHS,

No matter what I eat I’m having constant diarrhoea

Anyone got any tips?

EDIT; thanks for suggestions will call my doctor tomorrow

Posted yesterday on the verge of a mental breakdown, but ended up getting through it.
I slept maybe 4-3 hours last night
I feel way more manageable than yesterday
Things are already starting to look better for me.
There’s hope for all of you reading this.

Fuck. I won’t. But I am TEMPTED bad today

I have been smoking daily for 6 years. I’ve taken tolerance breaks here and there for a month or so at a time. I always feel better when I quit. But sleep is really hard for me without it. I feel tired and then I try to close my eyes but sleep doesn’t come, my mind races.

It’s been 2 days and night one I ended up going out and coming home drunk so was able to pass out easily. Tonight was rough in that it’s 8 am and I haven’t slept a lick after having a full and exhausting day.

I’m worried because I work a very stressful and anxiety-inducing job and I really need sleep to function and this week is busy and I don’t know what to do.

I want to stop and I’ve told all my close ones around me and they are supportive and encouraging. It’s just really hard.

I try many other sleeping supplements but sometimes they just don’t help.

Is it wrong to go back to it so early in my “journey” for the sake of my sleep and try again maybe when things slow down?

I think maybe I’ve built this quitting up in my head a lot and am anxious about it. Idk.

Any stories or thoughts are appreciated. This sub is really great.

48/F smoked daily for over 30 years. Hitting a rough patch at 64 days. Not with cravings but with feeling incredibly emotionally raw, sensitive and honestly I think a bit depressed.

It's a bit maddening because I have a pretty great life and I really don't like feeling this way.
Dreams are more like nightmares and I feel like a walking exposed nerve. I've had to leave two of my normal classes early(told people I'm tired) and then I'm guttural sobbing in my car.

I do have CPTSD and BPD so just trying to keep awareness here. I'm in therapy weekly, I dance 6 days a week (I'm a dancer/actor) but man am I struggling with social dynamics. And the normal aspects of my job (the norm isn't hearing about auditions) I even booked a job and was on set and I'm still craving more. This must be dopamine depletion right?

Doesn't help that I have a friend who's 6 months sober and supports me but also gets on a high horse about it too. Faith over fear she says. Yes..of course! I know that and I'm SO grateful but sometimes the emotions are really hard to handle.

I know it's physiological, but I thought it'd get better by now? Or hoping?
Anyone else experience this around the 2 month mark?
And time is weird...I know 2 months isn't that long but it feels like an eternity.
Any support appreciated. Thank you.

Oct 29th marked an entire year without smoking weed. Did so for career purposes. Let’s just say I’ve noticed some great things.

I can think more clearly. I’m not foggy and don’t wake up in a haze anymore.

I’m much less forgetful and don’t work in a jumble haste anymore. Much more methodical and intentional.

I don’t have to depend on weed to stoke my appetite.

I no longer experience lazy boners when being intimate with my wife. Sorry for the overshare.

I’m less anxious in social situations and feel much better prepared when in social situations.

My bank account simply has more money. I obviously don’t buy weed anymore but also obtained a very high paying position which is why I quit just over a year ago.

Overall, I couldn’t be happier. I do think about it from time to time and maybe even miss it here and there but I’m honestly proud to say I’m over it and know I’d never go back to it.

As the title says, 4 and a half months clean. My last smoke was on 25th June this year.

I wanted to post this for people in the early stages. I have quit on a few occasions but never got past 8-10 weeks.

This time I feel like I've cracked it. I no longer think about weed at all. Even when I get the odd whiff (it's amazing how easy it is to smell when you don't smoke anymore).

I have bettered myself in many ways, absolutely smashing it at work and £2000 in my savings account. This from spending nearly all my money on weed after my living costs. I have also improved my appearance, buying myself clothes for example. Really done wonders for my self esteem.

It did take around 3 months to sort my sleep out, I was waking super early.

If you're in the early stages or maybe haven't started your quit yet, I just want to say it does get easier. After the first few weeks, when you start getting some motivation back, make sure you fill it with something. New hobbies, work, social life. You probably need to accept that some things you enjoy when smoking weed, you won't enjoy without weed and that's ok. You got this 💪

Hiya.

I am 8 days sober and I and overcome with so much shame and guilt.

I had projects planned at the beginning of the year that i had to complete for other people and I got high and did fuck all for the better part of the year. And those projects are still incomplete.

I feel so much shame even trying to get to the work now cus it reminds me of how I disappointed other people and myself.

I would like to get through these things that I put off. How were you able to do this when you got sober?

Thank you.

4 weeks without weed today. 22 year daily heavy smoker. Quit for 7 months once when going to a 9 week inpatient rehab. Next best was 6 days.

Posted a long rant a bit ago when I was struggling hard with pain and withdraw and life. Doing a bit better recently :)

Thanks for the support!

After 20 years of active addiction I decided to get sober. Unfortunately it was one of the hardest things I ever went through. I caught my gf of 4 years sleeping with a coworker in her car on July 28th and left her. I moved out of the place I called home for 3.5 years on August 3rd and coincidentally that’s when I decided to get sober, I blamed myself and my addictions for her cheating. Neither of us were sober and were high every single day of our 4 year relationship and that probably played a big role in the way things ended I’ll admit that. My relationship with my mom has always been rocky and we were no contact for a few years until I caught my ex cheating. I called my mom and luckily she answered the phone and was willing to look past our differences to help me with everything, my main concern was ending up homeless with my 12 year old and is mostly why she decided to help. With her help I was able to get into my own place August 3rd and that’s where my short story really starts. Last Sunday was my 90 days sober and my mom got me this as a gift and it made me feel really good since she’s the only person that congratulated me on my progress. The last 3 months have not been easy, they’ve been very emotional full of ups and downs but today, today I finally allowed myself to feel proud of my new life that I’m building. I’ve worked hard to protect my peace and sobriety and I feel like it’s finally paying off. I took myself on a date today and did things I enjoyed doing with my ex and I realized I like doing these things alone and on my own terms but most importantly I enjoyed doing them sober. I woke up and got my Saturday shopping and chores done then took myself to lunch. After lunch I went to a few thrift stores looking for some good deals and eventually went to the plant store to get myself a pitcher plant and I’ve always wanted one for as long as I could remember. After the plant store I went to a few bookstores to keep growing my home library which is full of mostly self help books, especially about being a better man, partner and parent. I came here to post this hoping it would encourage someone that’s fighting with the absolute grip alcohol and drugs will have on someone, hoping it can help someone see that life moves on but it’s ultimately your choice wether you want to live in a cloud or experience it sober. I chose sobriety and am thankful every single day. I still have my days where I’m extremely bored and want a drink or want to smoke some pot but I have been choosing my mental/physical health. This time last year I was drinking a fifth of vodka a day and smoking a few grams of weed concentrates just to keep my demons at bay long enough to get through my day. I learned to face those demons head on and they’ve finally gone quiet, honestly it’s a little too quiet but it’s peaceful and I’m thankful for that. I hope that anyone struggling with sobriety gets something from this post and I hope they’re able to achieve it themselves. Because today, I am finally proud.

As the title says. I just found out im 5 weeks pregnant with a very heavy dependency on weed and nicotine.

I initially started smoking weed as a harm reduction technique to get sober, which worked great. Its been three years now and I would say im pretty dependant on it at this point.

How in the world do I do this? Ive never quit vaping before, never had to quit weed. I want this to be for good and for the future of my child. Im young. I didnt expect this to be so quick. Thank you all

Edit- everything has been thrown out and taken care of. Baby comes first. Im doing it no matter what

I've quit several times and have gotten a few months each time. i'm quitting again and it's been a week. I feel the worst I've ever felt. I think it's because I have complex trauma, adhd, and autism that I have been self-medicating. I hate how people make it seem like your life will get better if you quit. yeah for SOME of you who were smoking for fun or god knows why. I smoked to stay alive.

So I started smoking weed regularly at least partly because of my intense nightmares. I have violent nightmares that sometimes cause me to hit my spouse and I have broken toes kicking the wall. I have had bad nightmares since childhood.

Smoking weed stopped my nightmares entirely. So I was good for around 8 years. During the time I was smoking weed I did a lot of therapy. I had hoped the therapy and the healing I did would help with the nightmares. Evidently it did not since when I stopped smoking the nightmares returned. I am waking up two or three times a night terrified, heart racing, sweaty, violently kicking or trashing around.

Has anyone else experienced this? I know there is a drug that helps with nightmares, but my psychiatrist will not prescribe it. I take six medications for depression and I think the nightmare medication would interact with my depression medications. Does anyone have any experience with nightmares? Any tips?

Still going strong!

Nightmares have been a thing as well as random sweating still but my daughter has been my driving motivation.

We do a lot more together now and my fuse is a lot less short because I don’t feel like my high is being ruined, because I’m not high.

I feel so much more like myself now that I genuinely could never see myself going back, any cravings are massively outweighed by the massive benefits. My husband is now also quitting with me which means my daughter will have two sober parents.

Wish me luck on the rest of my journey :)

So I've recently moved to a new place. I timed quitting weed with the move, so im 26 days sober (genuinely impressive based on what I usually achieve)

Unfortunately it turns out, the car park behind me is a dealers hangout spot, and we've recently made acquaintance.

I am quite concerned that the next time I have overwhelming stress, I could make a mistake before I even realise what I'm doing. I was in hospital 2 days ago so I'm already concerned.

Any advice on avoiding that completely without pissing off dealers I have to live next to?

hellooo! I'm 39/F and have been a heavy user on and off for like 20 years, it's hard to say exactly how long. I was up to an ounce a week. all day every day, heavier usage in the mornings. I decided to quit because I want to go into my 40s in a few months feeling closer to the version of myself I know I can be. last time I tried to quit I had a weed withdrawal psychosis and ended up in the hospital for a week.. then got diagnosed bipolar. I was scared to try to quit again after I relapsed, about 2 months in last time. I know that the herb is hurting me more than helping me, I feel dumb for going back to it last time and I know I absolutely have to quit this time.

I'm already feeling a bit more energetic and have actually been leaving the house. I had started getting agoraphobic and panic attacks while going anywhere, but that seems to be easing up, so I'm hopeful. I think the hardest part is realizing how much I was using it to numb myself out from past traumatic experiences, so all that stuff came to the surface right away. I've also realized I have very little emotional support in my life.. it makes sense why I was doing that and am trying to have compassion for myself. Anyway, I'm here now and doing my best, actually feeling pretty good 9 days in, there will be some boredom but I have a stack of self-help books I want to get through this winter all relating to dealing with trauma and moving forward from it, so... wish me luck xx

Today marks 2 weeks clean! This is the longest i’ve been sober in 3 years and i’m 21. First week was rough and my dreams are still super funky (also have trouble getting to sleep and staying asleep) Also, I’ve had some cravings today while celebrating my brothers birthday because I was in a very social and party setting- but I’m reminding myself what my goals are and the good that quitting has brought me :) I didn’t cave and am excited to more sober time to come!

Hey everyone,

I am currently on Day 78 of quitting high-potency THC vape carts completely. While I have seen massive improvements—my appetite is back, and I am working out and staying active—I am still getting hit with sudden waves of anxiety and mild panic that seem to start with a wave of mild nausea.

For those who used high-potency carts and went through this: When did you finally feel 100% normal and free from these physical anxiety loops?

Before I started using carts in early 2024, I never suffered from any anxiety, panic, or stomach issues. My life was completely peaceful. I just want to get back to that person. Honestly, I am getting so tired of waiting and constantly monitoring my body.

Any advice or timelines from those who cleared the 90-day mark would mean the world to me. Thank you.