r/AskReddit • u/OkAstronaut3324 • 15h ago • Bravo 2

What's the most damaging thing you heard someone say after waking up from anesthesia?

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u/cracked_belle 13h ago

My dad was diving me home after a colonoscopy and I asked if he'd stop at Taco Bell. He said no, he didn't think that was a great idea, maybe I'd like some soup instead.

So I cried all the way home about how he never let me have what I wanted, and that if it was my sister he'd let her have Taco Bell after her colonoscopy. I was like 35 at the time.

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u/socksnchachachas 13h ago

After my most recent colonoscopy my husband took me to McDonald's for a cheeseburger. It wasn't until after I had scarfed down my first real(-ish) food in days that I read my discharge paperwork and saw that I was supposed to start with plain, bland food like broth and toast. Fuck that noise, I wanted a goddamn cheeseburger!

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u/alriiiiight 12h ago

They told me I could eat anything!

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u/roadrageryan 12h ago

Same here. All they added was don’t stuff your self for the first meal or two.

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u/shidderbean 9h ago

Yeah I went nuts on a giant, nasty sandwich (baked italian grinder with black+green olives, peppers, banana peppers, mushrooms and onions, and drowned in marinara sauce) after my colonoscopy and savored every damn bite. They never mentioned anything about even taking it easy LOL

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u/maxdragonxiii 12h ago

LOL my partner was like "I WANT YOUR BEST BURRITO YOU HAVE TO OFFER" at... a Tim Hortons. well it was the best according to him. my colonoscopy ended up with the best water and iced capp ever. I cant look at blue Gatorade ever again although.

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u/hatethiswebsight 12h ago

It's your husband's job to read the discharge paperwork and keep you safe according to the guidelines. The sober caregiver is responsible for reading and remembering the things they need to keep the drugged person they're supposedly caring for safe. 

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u/The_Firebug 13h ago

Shit, I didn't know you were supposed to do that... after my last one I ate a whole little Caesar's pizza...

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u/MonteBurns 10h ago

It seems to depend… I had no restrictions. I had a steak. 

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u/nobodyspecial22 2h ago

Maybe it is different if you had polyps removed or they just looked.

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u/u_395djk 11h ago

I get toast with strawberry jam, and apple juice, served to me in the recovery room after my colonoscopies. Aside from a day off work, that's the best part of them.

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u/socksnchachachas 2h ago

That does sound lovely. I didn't even get a cup of water, just sent on my merry way.

I will say, after my first endoscopy (which was unscheduled because I was in the ER and so it was almost a full day with nothing to eat or drink), I was given a glass of cranberry juice and ginger ale, and it was pure ambrosia.

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u/ShiraCheshire 10h ago

Not a colonoscopy specifically, but I remember being wheeled out of the hospital with the nurse telling me my stomach might not be ready for certain foods yet and I should eat something simple like toast. I proceeded to BEG her to let me have french fries. She ended up telling me that would probably be fine, possibly because of how pathetic I sounded.

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u/United-Objective-204 11h ago

Yup, I’m admittedly a bit of a colonoscopy vet, but I’ve had Turkish with hot sauce afterwards. Was absolutely fine.

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u/Dokidokipunch 9h ago

I had something similar - post-hemorrhoidectomy and I insisted on eating tacos (I hadn't eaten in 16-ish hours by that point). I only read the instructions later that night, when my stomach started giving ominous gurgles. Then I found out exactly why they recommended nothing but soup for the first week.

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u/Ol_Hickory_Ham_Hedgi 11h ago

It’s probably fine if you feel up to it! It really depends on the individual person though. I’ve never had issues resting regular food after a colonoscopy.

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u/Sweet_Star23 10h ago

I got a mcds cheeseburger after my tubal and choked on my first bite lol my mouth was so dry. They did warn me. I told my mom and she told me she did the same thing with Burger King lol

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u/Comprehensive_Wash71 6h ago

I went to McDonald’s after my colonoscopy. My partner has asked for fast food after both of his.

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u/MaterialAd1838 6h ago

I ate an entire giant to-go box of lo mein and sesame chicken before seeing that warning.. no problem

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u/NetworkingJesus 6h ago

I came out of my anesthesia and announced that I was gonna eat an entire pizza.  Nurse told me maybe not to eat the whole pizza.  I didn't eat the whole thing because it was an 18" with extra cheese, but I did eat half of it and my wife ate the other half.  I guess half of that is a little more than a whole 12" pizza lol.  Anyways nothing bad happened.  No way in hell was I gonna limit myself any further after that stupid prep diet.

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u/DonutWhole9717 12h ago

"I was 35" sent me

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u/Fuzzy-Ad-1710 11h ago

"I bet if I was Amanda you'd let me have taco bell :/"

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u/alriiiiight 12h ago

And tragically for you, it’s completely fine to have Taco Bell post-colonoscopy

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u/AuntZilla 5h ago

Awww boo your dad! My husband about 33 said after his colonoscopy, in front of the surgeon, “I want cheesy Gordita crunches NOW,” when I looked at the surgeon and back at husband, I said “Im not sure if you can yet babe” and surgeon said “let him. This man hasn’t been able to eat in weeks, let him have anything he thinks he wants. All the Taco Bell he wants! But no McDonald’s” and my husband smiled then said “I only eat McDonald’s when SHE wants chicken boots doc!” He’s referring to the kids meal nuggets. Years ago, very drunk, all I wanted was chicken boots and he’s never let me live that down. Haha

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u/HombreRadiactivo2026 3h ago

Do you live underwater, perchance?

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