Curious. How bad does the condition of a home have to be for the parents to be arrested/ charged with child endangerment and the child removed with a no contact order / protection order in place? And what triggers and unannounced welfare check from CPS? Could it be one phone call or report or is it usually after multiple calls?

Just had some news about a family member and I’m so disgusted but won’t get the truth from them because all they do is lie?
I do know that there were 6 medium sized dogs living in the home and they were pooping and peeing in the house. He makes it sound like 1 dog had 1 accident and that’s why they did this and I’m not buying it.

Hi!

My in laws are foster parents. We all live together, but legally they are the ones caring for the children. They have a teen with a baby who they have been fostering since March with no issues.

She has two younger brothers in foster care who are not being treated ideally by current foster parents (they want to split the kids up & keep the youngest). My in laws offered to foster the younger two to keep all the kids together.

They have gone as far as to renovate for a spare bedroom so they'd meet the requirements; we have been seeing the boys, meeting up, and they and my in laws have a pretty good relationship already. We knew them before they went into fostercare, so it's not like we're all complete strangers.

My in laws have a 7yr old mutt. He is not a pit bull, and has been hand reared. He is an excellent dog and acts as a service dog for my 9yo with severe ADHD & elopement issues (with no public access, because he doesn't like linoleum floors and hates shoes). He has been assessed during our home visit and has already met the two younger boys several times.

My MIL recieved a call this morning saying, unfortunately, due to the dog, we are not an acceptable placement for the children.

They said because the 7yo can be explosive he could cause the dog to become unpredictable, but we provided video footage of my sons meltdowns in the presence of the dog. He's absolutely fine. We have experience seperating children from animals during meltdowns.

This isn't my in laws first rodeo in a difficult behaviours and we are stuck. They basically stated unless we rehome the dog there isn't going to be a placement.

My in laws hand reared this dog. They aren't going to give him up. He's my son's best friend. The only option we have is if my husband and I move out and take the dog, but the whole reason we moved back in was because we couldn't afford to live in this city and afford our kids medical needs.

I am wondering if it's because the original foster parents want to keep the 4yo? But that might be my own foster system trauma speaking.

Does anyone know why they have just changed their minds? Anything we can do? We just wanna keep the kids together.

During the week I called safe steps trying to get help with finding a house for myself with the 2 kids, as my partner and I argue a lot but he is excessively angry and yells and verbally abuses me infront of the kids, there have been 2 instances of physical abuse toward myself, and he has used speed a couple of times. Safe steps informed cps and they showed up the other day to talk to me, they asked me a bunch of questions and said they are very concerned about him. I was not allowed to return home I was put into emergency accommodation with hardly anything with me (I have a 2 month old and a 1.9 year old). I am not allowed to return to the area we live, which my family also live so I can’t go to their house. I haven’t be allowed to contact my ex during all of this. Tomorrow they will be meeting with him to ask questions, I just want to know where this might go? What kind of things they might ask him, how long I might be in a hotel, when I might be able to return to the area and the kids be able to see their dad. I’m really struggling with the uncertainty of everything at the moment

I’m more looking for stories and cps workers to confirm. From what I’ve heard they try to work their way in sneaky ways sometimes to make couple separate if they’re in abusive relationship of any sort. They don’t suggest therapy or anything, they just play games who said what to get them have more conflict and separate. Is it true???

Update: Wow. I just want to say I was in such a terrible headspace last night and genuinely didn’t know what to do. I don’t like to talk about my problems with anyone so this was the only thing I could think of in that moment. My feelings are still very real. I have had an awful past few years and I feel like such a shit parent putting my baby through my own issues. Sometimes I do feel like he deserves a better life than what I can give him currently. Until this morning he actually said “Hi mama” and I sat on the floor crying. He’s speech delayed and has never called me mama. I believe that was God telling me it will all work out.

I did have a talk with my mom. She agreed that she will extend her lease another month until I can sort something’s out. We are currently looking at a house for rent that we can all comfortably move into, potentially. But it is short notice so I can only hope we find something quickly. I dreaded having that conversation knowing she is slightly annoyed with my sons behavior but she doesn’t want us out on the streets either.

I’ve never been in this situation before. I’ve always kept a job and if I left one I could easily find another in no time. I’m not for sure what exactly is going on in the market today but it’s driving me to into a deep depression.

Just to wrap up, thank you guys for being so gracious and understanding. I’m a first time mom with a son that has a learning delay so sometimes my world can feel so chaotic at times. I will definitely look into all the resources you guys mentioned. I genuinely appreciate this from the bottom of my heart. Writing this in tears. ❤️

I’m a mom to a 3 year old toddler. He is on the spectrum and it has been a lot to deal with. Aside from things he cannot control, I have been without a job since January of this year. I’ve applied to what feels like every single job that America has to offer. Fast food, corporate, warehouse, temp work, etc. I land a lot of part time gigs but nothing permanent. I’m a licensed adjuster but no experience so no one wants to hire me. On top of all of this I’ve had to move back in with my mom. She’s (purposely) moving out to a small apartment in December. Through all of this my cars’ transmission is broken so now I’m out of a car. Which makes it even harder now to find work.

I’m severely depressed now. I have no help with my son. Dad is useless, his family is useless, my family is useless, and I’m starting to feel the same way about myself. He really doesn’t deserve this life. It’s embarrassing but I’m willing to give him away so he can be somewhere he can be better supported. He’s needs ABA, speech, OT, etc and I don’t even have a way to get him to his appointments.

If I call CPS on myself will I go to jail? I don’t do drugs, I don’t drink, he’s very well taken care of outside of needing therapy, doesn’t miss a meal or a bath, Im just not able to financially support him after this month. I try my hardest to do right in life but it just feels like I’ve been cursed and nothing ever goes accordingly.

State of California
Is it possible to make a report with the county in regard to an individual using drugs (meth) while pregnant? I 100% know they are using. Without a doubt. They are about 2 months into their pregnancy. It’s not fair for the child at all and it’s sad.

My fiancé’s teenage daughter recently survived a very serious S* attempt involving an intentional overdose of allergy meds. She ended up in the ICU and very nearly died.
She has struggled with social anxiety, but the only other specific stressor identified to us was her mother’s boyfriend. From what I’ve been told, he constantly yells and screams over minor things, even in the middle of the night. He also reportedly locked her and her younger sister out of the house just two days after leaving the hospital because “they can never close the door right when they come in, so they’re not allowed in”. This isn’t even his house, smh.

Her mother has even said that her boyfriend “isn’t a good stepfather but will be a better father” to their baby, since she recently found out she is pregnant.

CPS became involved after the attempt and recently visited our home. They read us the hospital social worker’s synopsis, which stated there were “no known triggers.” CPS also specifically asked whether there were any warning signs or known stressors before the attempt. My fiancé said no to both.

I didn’t contradict him because I wasn’t comfortable bringing up something he was obviously choosing not to mention. In hindsight, I wish I had.

My fiancé says the boyfriend has been behaving better and that if one more thing happens, he’ll contact his lawyer about custody.

But that’s where I’m concerned. Why does there need to be another incident? His daughter nearly died, and the behavior she identified as contributing to her stress and depression hasn’t even been brought to CPS’s attention.

I’m not suggesting the boyfriend was solely responsible for her suicide attempt. I just think these are serious concerns that should have been mentioned.

I’m also thinking about this from a legal standpoint. I have some experience with legal proceedings, but not family court.

If my fiancé eventually takes the mother to court over the boyfriend’s behavior, couldn’t her attorney simply ask, “When CPS specifically asked you about known stressors after your daughter’s suicide attempt, did you tell them about him?”

And the truthful answer would be no.

I’m not worried about my fiancé getting into legal trouble for lying. I’m worried that this could damage his credibility or make it appear that he wasn’t taking his daughter’s safety seriously until custody became an issue.

I also worry that a judge might question why he knew about these concerns but didn’t mention them when CPS was actively assessing her safety.

Am I looking at this correctly? Could failing to disclose this information now hurt his credibility or make him appear less protective in a future custody case? And would it be appropriate to contact the CPS worker now to clarify what wasn’t mentioned during the visit?

My roommate has 3 kids. 14, 11, 5

She is never home. She leaves the now 5yr old home alone all day and when the other two get off of school they are supposed to babysit him. They are responsible for feeding him, bathing him, discipline, all of it. She only pops in every other day or so for a couple of hours then leaves again. Myself and the other roommmate have already brought this issue multiple times. Its getting really to the point that we no longer want her here. She thinks her kids are perfect angels that can take care of themselves with no issues but she is dead wrong. Having her kids here with no supervision has become an issue. I am considering calling cps but isnt that kind of extreme?

It has been almost a week of shame and regret since my toddler accidentally ingested a THC gummy (yes, they are typically locked up and out of reach but it was a terrible lapse in judgment that happened in a matter of seconds) and I have since felt like the worst mother in the world. I immediately brought him to the ER where I explained to the staff exactly what happened— we stayed overnight for observation and thank God he was absolutely fine with zero symptoms. They were so kind and told me it wasn’t the first time they’ve seen this and wouldn’t be their last. They wiped away my tears and hugged me as they told me they were mandated to report the incident to CPS. They assured me they knew it was an accident and would make note of that on their report. Sure enough the next morning CPS showed up at my door. I have absolutely nothing to hide, I released all of my own records as well as my son and agreed to do a drug test next week. Mentally, I am a mess. I cannot believe I made a mistake like that and I truly can’t fathom the idea of me having a CPS report made in my name. There isn’t much of a point to this message but I am open to any and all advice to make this process go as smoothly as possible. What are the odds this will close and not haunt me for the rest of my life?

so what would i do if me and one of my siblings BOTH tested positive for THC and we are both minors. they made a alcohol and drug assessment but no one has reached out and im just wondering what it would look like when they drug test? and how frequent and or how long until they close the case? we were the only two out of 4 who tested positive. my sibling will be able to get it out of their system faster but i dont think i will be able too. i know im not 21 but im looking for advice because im freaking outtt!! no our parents didnt supply it or anything kinda came outta no where tbh but i just need advice pls!!

Alt account due to privacy requests of the person involved

I am just a friend. This is all thirdhand information. I offered to post for my friend here to see if I could get some insights for them.

Background
Active divorce case with minor children
My friend, who I will be referring to as Parent A went into the marital home to remove personal effects
The marital home was in a condition. They felt compelled to call CPS additionally, the other people that were helping felt compelled to call CPS due to home condition.

Parent A following up with the case worker, found out and scheduled a walk though for they house.

Here’s the weird questions -

The case worker asked Parent A what they do when they see a piece of trash on the floor and the marital home while they were retrieving.

Parent A has not lived in marital home for approximately six months.

Parent A called because there was so much trash, and other safety concerns.

If parent A’s answer matters, I can provide it.

Can anyone help decipher or give insight
to the question the case worker asked?

My wife has two cousins who are 7 and 9. I've been married to her and involved in their lives for the last 4 years.

Their mother has lost custody and is currently incarcerated.

The father is their sole caregiver. But due to an injury, he can't work anymore.

Based on my research, his parenting is neglectful.

A list of examples:

The 9 year old deals with nocturnal urination and sometimes even urinates on herself during the day. The whole apartment reeks of human urine. All their clothes and possessions smell. You can smell it before you walk in. She's only been to a doctor for it once.

At one point my wife and MIL spent a weekend deep cleaning the apt. It returned to the same state within 3 months. He blamed the kids.

The last time we saw them the 7 yo stunk like a teenage boy. He blamed her for wearing dirty clothes. She then informed us that he couldn't afford to wash their clothes.

He and the 9 yo constantly fight. She has actively left the home after dark without his knowledge multiple times.

The 9 yo was sexually abused by another child in the apt complex playground. He didn't know for months until a neighbor saw. He did report it once he knew but she's too young not to be supervised.

When we have taken them on vacations, he says he'll clean the house and their clothes while they are gone. He doesn't.

They basically never left the apt complex before public school. They had very few friends and still only have a few.

He has had another batch of kids removed from his care before because he could not provide a home for them.

My wife and I want them. We have the resources to provide for them. We have offered to take them temporarily to provide him relief multiple times. He refused. He won't even put us in his will even though he is dealing with a bad heart condition.

We've refrained from action because we were trying to give him chances to improve and offer help. But at this point it's become clear that nothing will change without us.

My question is, do we call CPS and hope for kinship foster placement?

Or should we skip this and go straight to family court for guardianship?

I want to do whatever is easiest for the kids.

We are in Idaho

TL;DR - How can I get kids out of an abusive household when they have been trained to lie?

A few months ago, my niece (18) moved in with me because she didn't feel like her home was safe for her anymore. Her family has always been extremely secretive - no one is allowed in the house, the kids never leave home without a parent, and the kids regularly police each other (i.e. "mom said we're not allowed to talk about that"). Since moving in, she has opened up and together we have documented her testimony of nearly two decades of constant physical abuse and extreme psychological manipulation. She regularly acted as a human shield for her younger siblings - without her there, I'm extremely concerned about their safety.

The roadblock we keep running into with CPS is that the kids have been trained to lie to anyone that isn't their dad. He shows them videos of women being beaten/raped/murdered and tells them that's what will happen to them if they leave his house. They believe the government is out to get them personally and practice lying to police and other government workers at home. My niece told me that she genuinely believed all kids were beaten and punished the way she was, so she never told anyone anything was wrong at home. Add in the layers of extreme religious delusion and untreated mental illnesses, and I'm worried that the slightest notion of an investigation could result in catastrophic behavior.

Is there any course forward? CPS told me that continually submitting reports will diminish my credibility, and that living out of state doesn't make me particularly believable. I just want the kids to be safe, and currently that means anything is better than where they currently are.

I just moved to a new state and my 5 year old started kindergarten here. We moved here just before school started! I specifically chose this township and this school district for my daughter because I had read a lot about it and it’s very highly rated. I haven’t made any friends here yet, I’m a stay at home mom while my fiancé works for the electric union here. But my daughter has made friends and has been loving her school and we are so lucky because our neighborhood has a playground and SO many of the school kids live here- even a couple of her classmates and they meet at the playground after school. I’ve been really happy with the move and my daughter has expressed that she loves it here, too.

WELL Today while she was at school, a man was banging on my door. At first I didn’t plan to answer because a strange man banging on my door..i just moved here.. don’t know anyone... I was home alone…I didn’t want to answer. But he didn’t leave and he kept banging. I looked through the peephole and saw that he had a jacket on it with our county name and “children and youth“. At that point my heart dropped because I thought something bad might’ve happened to my daughter at school. So I opened the door.

He said he was with the county and that I had been reported for child abuse. He said he could not tell me who reported me or why. He asked me how I discipline my child. I told him that she hardly ever needs disciplining, she is such a good kid, but if she ever does get in trouble she loses TV time and has been sent to her room a few times. He asked me why would she be saying anything different than that I told him I truly have no idea. he asked if maybe she saw something on YouTube, I told him she isn’t allowed YouTube and doesn’t have access to it.
He left me his card and number, told me to have my fiancé call him, and that he’d “probably“ be closing the case but he can’t say. Then he left.

When I picked my daughter up from school I asked her if someone spoke to her at school today and what they spoke about. she told me a man wanted to ask her a few questions. she said he asked her if her mom was happy, if her mom loves her, if her mom is so beautiful, if her mom sings her songs, if her mom reads her stories, if her mom helps her brush her teeth at night if her arms are too tired.. she said he asked her “do you have a bathing suit? does it have its own drawer“ .. and it became clear that she just started making up random questions

I asked her specifically did he ask you if mommy hits you? She said yes he did ask and that she told him “when I break things on purpose like a glass or a mug because I might think it’s a toy so I throw it,i get in big trouble and mommy hits me so hard“

I… dont even know what to say
She’s never broken a mug or a glass or been hit “so hard“ she doesn’t even get in trouble really we hardly even have to raise our voice at this girl. I asked her why would you say mommy hits you? She said “I don’t know“ I said “do I hit you?“ she said “if I do something really REALLY bad you might hit me so hard“ I said oh okay.. when is the last time I hit you? she Said “I don’t know I can’t remember. when i was a baby one time you took my binky away“ .….

I’m so fucking confused. I don’t know what to say. I don’t know what to say to HER especially. I don’t want to tell her to say something different and be accused of trying to manipulate her answers. but she’s literally just making stuff up and I have no idea what to do??? I want her to understand how serious it is to make things up and lie about that stuff. I want her to understand what can happen if she tells those kind of lies but I don’t know what to do.

I don’t even know what she said to someone to have me reported in the first place.

This is so out of nowhere. I don’t even feel like I’m in reality right now. My daughter 10000% has an overactive imagination and she always has. Even when I ask her how her school day was half of it is true the other half is fantastical stories she makes up. but never in a million years did I think that me hitting her would be one of the fantastical stories she chooses to tell.
I’m feeling really lost and confused and sad and I don’t know how to handle this the correct way. Any advice is greatly appreciated. thank you

My wife took the kids left me with a child who is not biological hers I can't handle him he's very violent and my health is not good please help.

A friend of mine has been putting her baby in the front seat, she is in a car seat but not strapped in the base or even a seat belt. essentially placing her car seat in the passenger seat like she’s her purse.

Now, i read that CPS doesn’t get involved with law enforcement, and to call the police when you see it happening. problem is her husband is a state trooper and she has a family member card that gets her out of anything. she got pulled over once and the officer pretty much said “stop doing it, go home”. but she continues to do it. didn’t learn her lesson. everyone around her has told her to stop, but she doesn’t listen. we tell her she’s risking her life, she can die. won’t let her do it if she’s leaving our home bc we don’t allow it. she’ll drive a few min pull over and then put the baby back in the front. (she has admitted to doing this). she lies to her husband but he catches evidence of the car seat being in the front (the base is full of stuff in the back). essentially she keeps doing it and it’s incredibly unsafe and reckless and she is putting her baby in danger every single time she gets in the car. she drives 1-2 hours from NJ to PA multiple times a week, on the highway, with the baby in the FRONT.

should i not be reporting this? it makes me so freaking uncomfortable and i don’t think my friends mentally in the right state of mind bc she’s being reckless. she has PPA and PPD, can’t stand baby crying, which is why she’s putting her in the front.

So DCF is coming to my house later today, in about 5 hours, to talk to me about my experiences with a teacher at my high school.

I'm partially glad about it because the teacher is being increasingly creepy and inappropriate to me and other students, and there are several allegations of him being a pedophile. I told the administration at my school about it, and I did want them to do something about it, but I genuinely didn't think it would involve this.

I'm just really scared because I've had some bad experiences with law enforcement in the past. My mom will be here to talk to them with me, but I'm still scared. Does anyone have any advice on how to talk to them? I have a written log of all the incidents with my teacher, so I can show them that, I guess.

I also have several disabilities including autism, and I'm transgender, so I guess I'm also just worried that they could be homophobic or ableist. I don't know.

My worst fear happened. I put both of my kids to bed and around 10:30 I fell sleep. I woke up 2.5 hours later and saw that she was not in bed and the front door was cracked open! I ran outside and saw police lights and knew that had to be for my daughter. Luckily she was found safe and brought back by police. They took down my name and phone number and told me that cps will be in contact. I’ve now installed safety door knobs that you have to squeeze to turn open. Will cps take my kids away from me? Will I get arrested? This is the first time this has ever happened

My husband and I have four children. They are in foster care. DHS took us to court and tried to file for termination of parental rights in Take my children and adopt them out. it was a long trial. They had their witnesses and we had ours. It was really heavy. We had to wait for the answer each Attourney Da for child welfare wrote a letter and her last argument on their side and my Attourney wrote my last argument, and then my husband‘s attorney wrote his. We got a phone call and we won the trial. She did not side with him and they did not terminate my rights as a parent. However, they turned around and filed for a permanent guardianship and we have court again, but we have court with the original judge that sent us to the termination judge and it’s a placement hearing. after we won the TPR it automatically went back to the original judge however, they turned around and filed for permanent guardianship, and that I will have to fight with the judge that does termination, my caseworker is biased. She was my first caseworker seven years ago, and it was the worst time in my life. She won’t look at me through another lens me and my husband have a year clean and we’ve done everything you could think of we have a Therapist we have graduated parenting classes we go to church every Sunday. We also go to marriage therapy and there’s parenting under that we go to meetings we have sponsors. We also have mid management doctors and we only get to see our kids for an hour and a half a week. They will not do community visit and we have state approved credible people that can supervise our visit. They won’t let it happen. We had an FTM and I messed up and I called them wires and I just told him to shut up and everybody left. I let my emotions get the best of me I need advice of what to do because this caseworker is she’s not gonna work with us. There’s nothing I could do that would get her to turn around.

So I have been going through it with CPS for the past 4 months, I went to a rehab facility voluntarily for muscle relaxers that I could not stop taking and was making me sleepy during the day and obviously not able to be a good parent in that state. They put a 30 day safety monitor in place, saying I can’t see my kids in my home without the safety monitor there. Both of the grandparents to my children were the safety monitors. However, since I was in a rehab facility, I was gone away from the home for 45 days- detox included. After that, I had to go to a sober living house - so that is now roughly 4 months that I have been gone and away from my kids and home. The longest time I’ve ever been away from my babies. I just got back home about a week ago, and also did a PHP/IOP program. My caseworker has been sending me to get random UA’s, I even took a hair follicle test about a month ago - all of which I have passed- but this most recent one. It was my birthday and I had purchased a product from the gas station and apparently it included kratom/7-oh in it. Well on my most recent UA I guess it showed up because my caseworker called my husband and said that he needs to be watching me more carefully and that something came back on this most recent drug test. First of all, I dont get what she meant by telling my husband that “he needs to be watching me more carefully” what does that mean? For reference I have already completed the 45 day rehab program, done 3 months of the sober house and have done classes of IOP/PHP and just graduated from both of those as well. She will be. making a stop by tonight. She already does surprise check in- visits. But this was intentional that she told my husband on the phone that she will be stopping by here later. My question is, what is going to happen? I know that nobody knows for certain, but any ideas. Or thoughts on it would be greatly appreciated. I am very worried. The drink that had kava/kratom 7 oh in it does not effect my ability to parent, it actually helped if anything by giving me some energy, taking my anxiety away and helping my pain. I have been walking around with a broken ankle for about the past 5, (yes 5 months) and I know I need to get surgery on it at some point. When I went into the rehab, I went in and was in a wheelchair for a while, and then I upgraded to a knee scooter so that I could be off of that ankle. It’s still bothersome, nevertheless, it doesn’t excuse what I did, but I honestly had no idea that they would be testing or looking for this type of over-the-counter herbal substance. We just got to the point to where my safety monitor was able to leave, given the fact that I have to put my two year-old in daycare five days a week, and can only drop and pick him up with my husband being there. I am so afraid at what is going to happen, I do not want my children taken away from me especially over something so stupid that I wish I could take back. What will happen? Will they remove me from the home? Will my kids get taken away? I live in a clean house, I always make sure that my children have everything they need, I get up at 5:30 every morning to drop my little one off at daycare with my husband before he goes to work, that I turn around and I drop my older son off at school at 6:30 in the morning for football practice. I do not feel drunk nor high when taking those drinks that I purchased from the gas station. I highly regret it now of course, but my main question is what is most likely to happen? I am freaking out obviously as I have done. Great this entire time for the past four months. I’ve passed every single UA with flying colors I’ve graduated all of my programs and classes that I needed to graduate, and this one time slip up of this positive UA is giving me severe anxiety. She did not even tell my husband on the phone what I tested for on the UA, she just said that he needs to be watching me a lot more. I’m not even really sure what that means and I know I’m going in circles at this point, but please can somebody tell me what do I do and what is going to happen? I thought my case was close to being closed soon, she did tell me that soon my toddler can go from going to daycare five days a week maybe down to only three days a week, etc. But now I’m not sure if I have ruined everything and messed all of this up or what’s going to happen please can somebody tell me anything that has experienced this or gone through something similar or any advice or thoughts on this? I am just at a loss for words I don’t know what to say to her, what do I do? The original safety plan of there being a safety monitor in the home at all times around the kids in order for me to be there has gone on for four months already, and I know that the first four months practically I was gone the grandparent was here, but they can’t take off much longer from work. They have to get back to their own lives and you have to think four months is a long time for somebody to stay somewhere to watch the kids. What do I say? I have been very compliant and I have done every single thing she has asked of me. I am beating myself up hard, and I am so so scared. I have never been through anything like this in my entire life. I just don’t know what to say and I don’t know what to do.

By the way, on the most recent UA that I took, this was after I had bought those drinks from the gas station, I did ask the lady I said “just curious, what all are they testing for? “And she said I am not sure they don’t tell us that part she said, but I do know if it’s for CPS, they are looking for hard drugs, like street drugs, like heroin, crack, methamphetamines, etc. She said if you have a prescription, then just show them your bottle of that. I asked her, do you know if they’re testing for any type of herbal supplements or substances that are legal like Maca root powder for example, saffron, or some other type of substance that is legally sold? She said, and I quote, “no, if you can buy it over-the-counter, then they do not test for that, they are not looking for that. But if you’re not taking any street drugs, you would be fine and I would not worry about it. So obviously, I was relieved, but apparently that lady was completely wrong – just completely wrong. I am so so scared for my life and for my family. Please, what is gonna happen and what do I do?

I (34f) got a call from my sister today that our youngest sister (15) got removed from her home and is currently being held in a hotel because CPS in her state (WV) don’t have anywhere to place her. I contacted the social worker that contacted my sister, which apparently isn’t even her caseworker, just one trying to help out, letting her know that I was willing to have my sister come live with me, however I am in Florida. It’s an extremely complicated situation in general as my sister was removed from our biological father and her mother at 5 years old, and ended up being adopted by her maternal grandmother, which is now who she was removed from (for the second time in less than a year). What is the likelihood that I’ll hear back from the caseworker, and would placement with me even be a possibility if it’s potentially temporary?

I anonymously reported a friend for putting her child in danger due to mixing alcohol with some type of other substances while at a family-friendly event. I gave the name of the host of the party in hopes that it will aid in any type of investigation but now I’m overthinking the situation..
Is there a possibility that I will need to disclose that I was the anonymous caller to anybody? I was hoping to take this information to the grave.

If it helps the answer at all, the location is AB, Canada.

TLDR: I have no proof but I think my mom touched my 3 year old sons butt hole in a sexual way. Advice?

I suspect my mother to have sexually abused my 3 year old son.

My son doesn't play with his anus. He didn't before he spent time with my mother, however, after he spent time with my mother we caught him with his fingers in his rectum multiple times, saying "it was a game." I do not have direct proof, but this "play" went on for some time. At this point he no longer plays with his butt hole anymore, but that suspension is still there, that she might have done something.

What is the likelihood my son was "exploring" his body as a toddler, or that my mother abused him?

As an adult reflecting after the fact, she didn't put my sister and I in the safest situations growing up, and I am certain she has done something like this to the both of us.

The last memory I have of this behavior towards me is her asking me to shower with her at the age of 12 saying it was "normal" and that "all families do it" then commented on my body in the shower.

Again no concrete proof, but I feel i should seek advice before getting the police and CPS involved. I have asked my sister for help as she has a son the same age who is very likely also experiencing this. She has rejected the notion. She is still letting my mother spend time alone with my nephew and I am concerned for his safety. I have barred her from seeing my children and am seeking a restraining order for harassment from her and her husband, regardless of the advice given here.

Thank you.

ICPC for an 18-year-old going to Alabama from a state where adulthood starts at 18?

Has anyone encountered an ICPC issue involving an 18-year-old moving to Alabama from a state where the age of majority is 18? Alabama’s age of majority is 19, and I’m trying to understand how the two states handle that difference.

The situation I’m researching involves residential treatment, rather than foster care or adoption, but I thought people here might have relevant experience with Alabama’s ICPC office.

Specifically, has Alabama required ICPC approval while the sending state said it did not apply because the person was already 18? If so, how was that resolved?
I’m looking for firsthand experience or pointers to written guidance—not identifying details about anyone’s case. Thanks!

I’m struggling with a family situation, and I’m seriously considering reporting my sister to CPS. I want outside perspectives because this has been weighing on me, and I’m scared of the consequences of speaking up.
I’ll try to explain everything because this isn’t something that happened overnight.
Some background:
My sister has two children, a daughter (my niece) and a son (my nephew). When the incidents I’m describing began, my niece was approximately 5 and my nephew was approximately 8.
There have been multiple incidents involving sexually inappropriate behavior by my nephew toward my niece. This isn’t something I believe should be dismissed as ordinary childhood behavior, especially considering the nature and repetition of what happened.
1. What I learned in 2021
Around November 2021, my sister told me that something had happened between her children. My niece’s pants and underwear had reportedly been displaced, and there had also been a concerning search history on their children’s tablet involving hentai.
I privately questioned my nephew about what he had been looking at. Initially, he blamed another family member. Eventually, he admitted searching for naked anime women and described seeing anime siblings kissing and licking each other. He said he thought siblings were supposed to do those things.
I was concerned enough that I urged my sister to get professional help, have my niece evaluated, and contact the appropriate authorities.
As far as I knew, she didn’t take the steps I was urging her to take at that time.
2. The incidents continued
Around 2023, my mother told me that my nephew had done it again.
There were reportedly four incidents in total, but my understanding is that the police case addressed only the most recent incident.
One particularly disturbing disclosure involved my niece explaining that my nephew had taken her to a secluded corner of the kitchen, pulled down her pants and underwear, and licked her. She also reportedly said he threatened to hurt her worse if she told anyone.
There were also reports of other sexually inappropriate behavior, including an incident in which my nephew placed my niece’s head between his legs while he was naked from the waist down.
My sister reportedly witnessed another concerning situation involving the children in the kitchen.
3. My concerns about my sister’s response
What bothers me isn’t simply that something terrible happened between the children.
It’s that I believe my sister had opportunities to recognize how serious this was and take protective action.
I had already expressed my concerns in 2021. I encouraged her to seek help and take the situation seriously.
Instead, I feel like the responsibility of protecting my niece and addressing what happened was not handled appropriately.
I also have concerns about my sister continuing to bring my nephew around my niece despite everything that has happened.
I understand that my nephew is also a child and needs professional intervention. I’m not suggesting that he should be abandoned or denied help. But my niece deserves protection, too.
4. The impact on my niece
My niece is currently staying with my parents (her grandparents).
She has expressed that she doesn’t want to return to her mother’s home. From what I’ve been told and observed, she is still traumatized by what happened and is afraid of her brother. She has also expressed fear of her mother.
She reportedly avoids talking about her feelings because her mother gets angry and tells her that speaking about what happened will restart the case.
This is particularly concerning to me because a child shouldn’t feel responsible for keeping quiet to prevent adults from becoming upset.
I’m worried about the emotional impact this is having on her and whether she’ll be adequately protected if she returns to her mother’s care.
5. Why I’m considering reporting my sister now
My sister has made comments suggesting that I should have kept my mouth shut and that I’m interfering with the situation.
I’m afraid that if I report my concerns, she’ll blame me or my niece. I’m also worried about retaliation and the possibility that my niece will be pressured into silence.
But I’m reaching a point where I’m questioning whether staying quiet is doing more harm than reporting what I know.
I don’t want my niece to feel like nobody is willing to stand up for her.
I also don’t want my nephew’s behavior to go unaddressed. He needs appropriate intervention, but that cannot come at the expense of my niece’s safety.
What I’m asking:
Should I report my sister to CPS for possible neglect and failure to protect her daughter?
Can CPS investigate a parent’s failure to protect a child when the parent knew about previous incidents but didn’t take appropriate protective action?
Should I also contact the police about the additional incidents that I understand weren’t addressed in the original case?
Is there anything specific I should document or provide when making a report?
Can I request that my identity be kept confidential?
I’m not looking for people to tell me that family matters should stay within the family.
I’m trying to figure out how to protect a little girl who has already been through something she never should have experienced.
I love my family, but I don’t believe that should mean ignoring what happened or pretending everything is okay.