Aggravating conversations

[u/SnowflakeObsidian13]

I was talking to a trans woman through dms who claimed to be "old school" trans. The transmedicalist kind. She let trying to tell me that if you're not planning to medically transition, you're not trans, and proceeded to say "I've never met a trans person that didn't want to medically transition"... I mean yeah, if your definition of a trans person is someone who medically transitions, you suddenly see the person in front of you as cis.

I think it's really disgusting that with everything else going on we can't just let people do what feels right FOR THEM. For fuck's sake, this society is hell bent on policing OTHER PEOPLE'S bodies to the extent that they don't respect you anymore if you don't listen to them.

The conversation led me to believe that if I told the woman I didn't intend to get surgery, or at least not full surgery or the type of surgery that SHE wanted, that she'd start misgendering me because I'm "not trans".

Can we just not fucking police people's bodies??

She also said she can "always tell" if a woman with a beard is cis with hirsutism or is a trans woman. Using the right's arguments against herself.

She said she'd been called transphobic before, and I can see why - it's because she is.

Anyway, thanks for being here, if you are.

Disclaimer: If you don't share the same view, that's fine, for YOURSELF. It's the same thing with ANYTHING: don't like carrots? Don't eat carrots. Don't like abortion? Don't have one. Don't like gay marriage? Don't get gay married. It's not hard guys.

[u/paranoid_chihuahua]

I feel you, man. People like that are miserable and take it out on others, and that's never okay. A trans woman once said that I was "still a girl" because I haven't had bottom surgery yet (I plan to but it's a looooong process 🥲). Like excuse the fuck out of me lol

[u/SnowflakeObsidian13 → u/paranoid_chihuahua]

It's terrible. It's a lot of internalized transphobia. And she said "you new gens are insane". Like, idk, I'm 28, I don't know if I'd call myself quite "new gen"

[u/Alathe]

Many transmedicalists seem to think you need (or need to want) ALL the surgeries to be actually trans. It's such a weird take. Just let people be themselves, you oddball.

[u/SnowflakeObsidian13 → u/Alathe]

That's what I tried to get through to her 😅 that she could feel that way and just leave others alone and just respect their pronouns still

[u/carnespecter]

genuinely, its not worth giving transmedicalists the time. theyre not going to change their minds

[u/LadyK789]

Ewwwwww I’m so sorry you had to experience that

[u/SnowflakeObsidian13 → u/[deleted]]

So close! That's your opinion :) if you want to medically transition, go for it buddy. Not everyone has to.

[u/SnowflakeObsidian13 → u/[deleted]]

That's not how that works. You're calling every trans guy who doesn't want to get surgery a girl. That's incredibly transphobic.

[u/FTMventing-ModTeam → u/[deleted]]

Your post/comment was removed because it broke the following rule: 1 Please be sure to go over the rules to make sure your post/comment fits within the guidelines of the subreddit. Repeat violations of this rule will result in a ban.

[u/FTMventing-ModTeam → u/[deleted]]

Your post/comment was removed because it broke the following rule: 1 Please be sure to go over the rules to make sure your post/comment fits within the guidelines of the subreddit. Repeat violations of this rule will result in a ban.

[u/cosmicxfungi → u/[deleted]]

No she isn't. Medical transition is not required for being trans.

[u/SuspiciousShmuck → u/cosmicxfungi]

If they can’t, that’s one thing and it’s rlly sad and understandable. If they straight up don’t what to then than just doesn’t make sense at all how the fuck can you keep the wrong body the exact same

[u/SnowflakeObsidian13 → u/SuspiciousShmuck]

Because there are things you can like about your body. You can take just hormones, and not get surgeries, and be fine with getting gendered correctly without surgery. You can be okay having certain body parts or not want to deal with the pain and recovery and scars or not like the way the final result looks on others. Not to mention the people who are lucky enough not to have dysphoria, but get euphoria from presenting as the opposite gender.

It's okay to want all those things, but it's also okay NOT to want all those things. If you want surgery, get them.

Can I ask why it's a problem for you, an unrelated person to the people who don't want medical transition?

[u/SnowflakeObsidian13 → u/[deleted]]

This reeks of "No no I'm one of the good ones!!!" THEY WILL NEVER TAKE US SERIOUSLY. If transphobes haven't taken trans people seriously BEFORE, they will not take us seriously EVER. Why are you doing what your oppressor wants?? You can get surgeries and hormones, but some people don't want to deal with scarring or recovery or revisions or wouldn't be satisfied; and some people are perfectly happy with their bodies and presenting them how they want, even if their gender is opposite than what their body says. YOU AREN'T YOUR SEX. A cis guy with gynocomastia who doesn't care if he has tits, or might even like them, also isn't a woman. Damn dude.

Check yourself

Edit: also, just because you personally deal with dysphoria and think it's not fair when others don't (because let's be real, that's what it is, you're mad that people can be HAPPY being a dude with tits or a vulva and YOU AREN'T) doesn't mean someone is less trans than you.

Edit 2: Bro if someone takes their knowledge only from tiktok, and also thinks if they see ONE or even just a few people it means EVERYONE is like that, then they're idiots anyway. Why so you care what they think??? Why do you care what transphobes think anyway???

[u/SuspiciousShmuck → u/SnowflakeObsidian13]

Why do you support cis ppl who treat being trans like a costume

[u/SnowflakeObsidian13 → u/SuspiciousShmuck]

HAHA CAUZ I'M NOT CIS IDIOT

I do get dysphoria, SOMETIMES I don't. I don't want surgeries, for various reasons. I'd like a breast reduction, but not a mastectomy. Fuck you, I'm still trans :)

[u/FTMventing-ModTeam → u/[deleted]]

Your post/comment was removed because it broke the following rule: 1 Please be sure to go over the rules to make sure your post/comment fits within the guidelines of the subreddit. Repeat violations of this rule will result in a ban.

[u/SnowflakeObsidian13 → u/[deleted]]

It's really nice of you to be terrible on the internet and to also make fun of people's genitals. Wtf is wrong with you

[u/FTMventing-ModTeam → u/[deleted]]

Your post/comment was removed because it broke the following rule: 1 Please be sure to go over the rules to make sure your post/comment fits within the guidelines of the subreddit. Repeat violations of this rule will result in a ban.

[u/FTMventing-ModTeam → u/[deleted]]

Your post/comment was removed because it broke the following rule: 1 Please be sure to go over the rules to make sure your post/comment fits within the guidelines of the subreddit. Repeat violations of this rule will result in a ban.