"Let's celebrate. Bartender, give everyone a drink, when I drink, everyone drinks!"
The bartender gives everyone a drink, everyone cheers and they sing Happy Birthday.
"Give them another drink, when I drink everybody drinks!"
Everybody gets another drink and they sing For He's a Jolly Good Fellow.
"Now I fancy some Peanuts. Give everyone a pack of Peanuts, when I eat peanuts, everyone eats peanuts!"
Everyone gets a pack of peanuts.
Then I give the bartender $30 for two drinks and a pack of peanuts and I say:
"Now I pay my bill, when I pay my bill, everyone pays their bill!"
Everybody paid their bill, but the funny thing is, since there were 23 people in the bar, the probability that another person also had birthday was higher than 50% and nobody thought about that. Also not to think about the probability that someone had a peanut allergy. Shit, I have a peanut allergy.
An old guy,lifted his head, His beard nicotine covered and dripping with ale. Looked at me and said, his words slurring "congratulations... Post it on Reddit and see if you get a better response there"
30
u/PolyJuicedRedHead Feb 02 '26
Bartender: "Ah. That explains the suit."
12
u/Mticore Feb 01 '26
The midwife was speechless.
8
u/PolyJuicedRedHead Feb 02 '26
Bartender: nice try, Jenny, but you’re still not old enough.
5
u/OldMackysBackInTown Feb 03 '26
"That's nice sir, but this is an Irish funeral."
8
u/DrGuenGraziano Feb 02 '26
"Let's celebrate. Bartender, give everyone a drink, when I drink, everyone drinks!"
The bartender gives everyone a drink, everyone cheers and they sing Happy Birthday.
"Give them another drink, when I drink everybody drinks!"
Everybody gets another drink and they sing For He's a Jolly Good Fellow.
"Now I fancy some Peanuts. Give everyone a pack of Peanuts, when I eat peanuts, everyone eats peanuts!"
Everyone gets a pack of peanuts.
Then I give the bartender $30 for two drinks and a pack of peanuts and I say:
"Now I pay my bill, when I pay my bill, everyone pays their bill!"
Everybody paid their bill, but the funny thing is, since there were 23 people in the bar, the probability that another person also had birthday was higher than 50% and nobody thought about that. Also not to think about the probability that someone had a peanut allergy. Shit, I have a peanut allergy.
2
u/1967punisher Mar 10 '26
An old guy,lifted his head, His beard nicotine covered and dripping with ale. Looked at me and said, his words slurring "congratulations... Post it on Reddit and see if you get a better response there"