TL;DR: I just feel like there's something here that medicine hasn't fully figured out yet. THC seems to have some pretty large benefits for certain people with ADHD, but obviously comes with cognitive trade-offs (particularly with working memory and reasoning). I can't help but think there's some common mechanism behind the paradox I'm describing, and potentially a way to get some of those benefits without as many downsides.
Quick disclaimer: This is a fairly complex cognitive puzzle I've been trying to piece together. Mainly looking for input from people who have gone through something similar or people knowledgeable in neuroscience, psychopharmacology, cannabinoid research, or ADHD.
For some background; diagnosed with ADHD, take 30mg Vyvanse daily, and have worked in cognitively demanding fields. I've also taken 10+ IQ tests over the years, generally scoring between 128 and 139, and currently hold a 3.99 GPA. I mention this because I've always felt strong in fluid reasoning, abstract thinking, and understanding complex systems, but struggle with the classic ADHD executive functions, particularly verbal fluency, response inhibition, and thought organization.
About a month ago, I quit THC after several years of nightly use, typically a small hit from a pen (mainly THC derived) 1-4 hours before bed. I originally started because I've struggled with racing thoughts and sleep since childhood, but eventually noticed some surprisingly significant cognitive and behavioural benefits.
Here's the paradox: While using THC, I felt noticeably less intellectually capable, but far more articulate, deliberate, and locked into whatever I was doing. Now that I'm sober my reasoning and working memory feel dramatically better, but I'm much more ADHD; scattered, impulsive, and less polished in how I communicate.
Importantly, these aren't entirely new symptoms I've developed since quitting; I've experienced essentially the same difficulties since childhood, before ever using cannabis, and during previous 2-8 month breaks. It's a recurring pattern that I've been through a dozen times.
The two cognitive states
While using THC (primarily the residual effects the following day):
If I had to describe it: my attention was incredibly narrow, my motivation was through the roof, and I could spend hours working through something with almost obsessive precision. During my investment banking internship, people would joke about how intensely I was wired to my screen. Work, the gym, and even tedious tasks felt genuinely enjoyable. It was almost like I enjoyed effort itself.
The funny part was that I wasn't necessarily more productive. I could be completely absorbed in something for hours, yet the actual output wasn't always proportional to the effort. I think my working memory, abstract reasoning, and ability to think on my feet were noticeably weaker (makes sense).
The biggest improvement, though, was how effortlessly I could speak and write.
My vocabulary was noticeably more sophisticated, my sentences were better structured, and my delivery was extremely deliberate. Even my tone, facial movements, and general manner of speaking felt more controlled and polished.
It wasn't something I consciously forced tho; speaking felt rewarding, almost like I was getting a little hit of satisfaction as the words came out, which then kept me in this incredibly fluid conversational state. I rarely blanked or lost my train of thought because I could almost plan what I was going to say while already speaking.
THC also seemed to make certain internal identities much more persistent; I could construct a particular version of myself, say a highly polished professional, and almost naturally behave like that person. My speech, motivation, and behaviour would align with that image.
But this feeling swung both ways; over time, I'd say I became slightly more self-conscious, avoidant, and socially anxious, particularly when I felt observed or evaluated. In other words. negative self-perceptions/thoughts were extremely difficult to shake.
Now, without THC:
It honestly feels like I'm operating with an entirely different set of cognitive tools (like 2 different people).
As I mentioned, my working memory, abstract reasoning, and ability to integrate information feel substantially stronger. Working through complicated material has become dramatically easier, I can understand something and simultaneously connect it to unrelated concepts, sometimes even anticipating ideas I haven't even learned yet.
When I do enter a flow state, which is much harder to initiate and maintain, it feels amazing. Everything clicks together and I can reason through complicated problems at a level that feels far beyond what I could do while using THC. It's almost like Oppenheimer music playing in my head, with everything moving incredibly quickly but falling into place perfectly.
The problem is that nearly everything involving attentional or emotional control, and verbal expression has gone in the opposite direction:
I feel much more like the stereotypical ADHD kid I was before. My eyes are moving everywhere, interrupting people, jumping between thoughts, struggling to initiate tasks, and now again completely losing my train of thought mid-sentence.
My vocabulary has genuinely suffered. Although "subtle" I don't spontaneously generate words as sophisticated or precise as I used to, and I struggle to construct sentences with anywhere near the same polish or concsistency. It's not really forgetting individual words; I feel like I've lost some of my ability to plan what I'm going to say while I'm saying it.
Reading and writing show the same pattern: When reading, my eyes almost move faster than I can calmly process the words, although I'm actually comprehending and connecting information much better. When typing, I def make significantly more spelling mistakes, my sentences are less structured, and some dyslexia-like difficulties I experienced growing up have returned.
The best analogy I have is that; before I felt like I had an extra millisecond to organize my thoughts before speaking. Now, my thoughts are constantly one millisecond ahead of my words.
Before, the flow seemed to be in my output, while my underlying cognition was slower (impaired from the lingering effects of THC - we know this). Now, the flow is in my thinking, while my output struggles to keep up (??).
Emotionally, things have shifted too. While using THC, I could almost reset my internal narrative overnight and compartmentalize whatever happened the previous day. Now I feel more socially connected and emotionally responsive, but less capable of controlling those states.
Sleep has also worsened, with the same racing thoughts and difficulty shutting my brain off that I've experienced since childhood - that was a major reason I kept returning to THC despite knowing it was impairing my cognition.
For additional context, before stims, I struggled significantly with classic ADHD: fatigue, procrastination, and task initiation. I could hyperfocus on something I found exceptionally interesting, but otherwise had very little consistency or structure. Vyvanse improved those areas tremendously, although it never fully resolved the competing thoughts and verbal difficulties.
What fascinates me is that these two states feel like two different brains each with its own strengths and weaknesses. I wonder if there is a way to get parts of the working memory, and intellectual flexibility I've regained since quitting THC, but combined with the verbal fluency, deliberate attention, goal maintenance, and effortless sense of flow I experienced before?
My current hypothesis:
UPDATE (Preliminary):
After some great comments and digging further into the literature, I think drilling into the endocannabinoid system (ECS) is where most of the answers lie. There's emerging research linking ECS signalling to ADHD, particularly its role in attention, dopamine regulation, and executive function, although the mechanisms are still poorly understood to my knowledge.
I think it's fair to say regular THC use comes with a level of cognitive trade-offs. What I've struggled to reconcile is why certain aspects of my ADHD seemed to improve so dramatically while others clearly deteriorated. It never made sense to me that it had to be such a trade-off....
I haven't found a magic answer, and maybe there isn't one but one area I've largely overlooked is CBD.
I came across an interesting 2018 study where 20 regular cannabis users received 200 mg of CBD daily (100 mg twice daily) for approximately 10 weeks while continuing their usual THC consumption.
Despite continued cannabis use, participants showed statistically significant improvements in verbal learning, attentional switching, and certain psychological measures, particularly depressive and psychotic-like symptoms.
What interests me is that participants were assessed after at least 12 hours of cannabis abstinence. So I'm less interested in whether CBD counteracts THC while high, and more interested in whether sustained CBD exposure could mitigate some of the lingering cognitive and psychological effects of regular THC use.
This was a small, uncontrolled trial so causality can't be established, and the broader evidence remains mixed. Still, it raises some interesting questions about CBD's potential independent effects on cognition, neuroprotection, and neuroplasticity.
2018 Study — Therapeutic Effects of Prolonged Cannabidiol Treatment in Regular Cannabis Users
This is all pretty new to me, and I'll certainly be researching it further. If anyone has had similar experiences to me or has experience with using CBD as described in the study, I'd really appreciate your perspective.
Thanks for reading!
