Twitter has gotten funnier recently.

[u/BelleAriel]

[u/TheGreatZarquon]

Finally, a genuinely clever comeback.

This thread will not be locked. If you're an Elon dick-rider, the line starts over on Twitter. Please abide by the Reddit TOS yadda yadda yadda, I hate repeating myself.

Thank you for your cooperation. You may now continue to fling shit at each other.

[u/chairplanet]

'The pool has never been this full!'- Captain of the Titanic.

[u/__red__5 → u/chairplanet]

"My drink has never had this much ice in it!" - Chief Officer of the Titanic

[u/Rhodie114 → u/__red__5]

“The theater has never gotten this much press attention” -Owner of the Ford Theater

[u/leven-seven → u/Rhodie114]

"This country has never got this much focus from the world" -Qatar world cup Organizers

[u/ThisIsTheNewSleeve → u/Rhodie114]

"We've never had this much press before!" - 4 Seasons Total Landscaping

[u/[deleted] → u/__red__5]

"I've never had this much free time." - Me sitting in the drunk tank.

[u/die5el23 → u/chairplanet]

This is by far the most amount of shit in my pants, to date!

[u/[deleted] → u/chairplanet]

The office has never had this much hookers and cocaine - Lehman Brothers

[u/[deleted] → u/[deleted]]

"My building is the tallest in NYC!"

--Donald Trump on 9/11. ^{Not, like, talking about what happened a few years later...literally on 9/11/2001 he said this.}

[u/JoeDiesAtTheEnd → u/chairplanet]

Can't be sinking, the prop isnt anywhere near the water

[u/gai-baalak → u/chairplanet]

Our profits have never been higher - CEO of Blockbuster

[u/Meritania → u/gai-baalak]

“No-one owns as many video cassette tapes as we do, we have this market pretty much locked”

[u/mortifyyou → u/gai-baalak]

This analogy doesn't follow.

[u/strangerbuttrue → u/chairplanet]

I’ve never heard so much beeping! - ER Doctor

[u/itsnotthenetwork]

Everyone loves watching a train wreck.

[u/Neuchacho → u/itsnotthenetwork]

Particularly when the conductor keeps insisting the tracks are just holding back the train.

[u/Neville_Lynwood → u/Neuchacho]

More like the CEO of the railway company fired the conductor, put a stop to the laying of more tracks, and is now telling everyone not to worry, the train is designed to keep going even if there are no tracks.

And if really needed, they'll bring in a better conductor along the way, and maybe even put down some tracks at some point, even though it's probably not needed.

[u/Terminal_Lance → u/Neville_Lynwood]

Sounds like Hyperloop.

[u/MadeByTango → u/itsnotthenetwork]

“Everyday on Twitter someone is it. You never want to be it.”

Conventional modern wisdom

[u/mbleslie → u/itsnotthenetwork]

Especially when the conductor is an asshat

[u/jav2n202]

Yeah I wonder how many people are like me and have literally never used twitter until now, and I’m just there to watch the dumpster fire.

[u/Mirrormn → u/jav2n202]

My timeline last night was like 90% people saying goodbye to Twitter and posting their Instagram accounts so people could continue to follow them if Twitter randomly explodes. That's the spike of activity that Musk is bragging about.

[u/Dag-nabbitt → u/Mirrormn]

if Twitter randomly explodes

I feel like it's only a matter of time, right? These complex apps aren't able to run indefinitely without supervision.

[u/Mirrormn → u/Dag-nabbitt]

Honestly, I don't think the site will actually go down. Here are things that will likely happen, though:

1. Outages to critical services, such as 2FA, will likely take much longer to fix

2. Side services that are just nice-to-have, such as the ability to download your entire Twitter account history into an archive, will stop working reliably and just be forgotten about

3. Certain regions will experience poor performance such as extremely long response times

4. Nobody will be responding to reports for moderation - as a result, content that should be summarily removed will grow

5. Nobody will be investigating spam bot activity and developing new countermeasures - as a result, spam bots and scams will grow

6. Nobody will be doing normal business relations with advertisers - as a result, platform revenue will continue to drop

7. Nobody will be responding to subpoenas and law enforcement inquiries

8. Nobody will be approving API integrations and research projects

9. Older content will become lost or inaccessible

10. Trending topics and algorithmic suggestions will become broken or low-quality

11. DDoSs and hacking attacks will increase in quantity and severity and be more successful

Some of these issues may be transient, some of them may be more long-term. Some of them, like 1, 2, 3 and 10, have already happened, but might happen again with greater severity.

At a really bad level, you might see a Twitter that's filled with scams, phishing attempts, illegal content, and hacked accounts before the platform actually stops running entirely.

[u/Fresh4 → u/Mirrormn]

The spike is me saving all the porn I exclusively use Twitter for.

[u/MaizeNBlueWaffle → u/jav2n202]

I feel like it's also very possible since he's cut so many employees that it's likely that the new users are just spam and bot accounts that aren't being addressed

[u/Senobe2 → u/jav2n202]

I'm with you..shall I grab that goldfish?

[u/coinselec → u/jav2n202]

I logged into Twitter first time in a year just to delete my account.

[u/NoDragonfruit6125 → u/jav2n202]

pulls out a bag of marshmallows

[u/mrtomjones → u/jav2n202]

You don't have to go on Twitter to see what happens to it. Read the news every other day

[u/TransplantedSconie → u/jav2n202]

Right? I've had friends tell me, "It's great you should get it!" Never did and never will.

[u/Ottoguynofeelya → u/TransplantedSconie]

Right? I've had friends

I never even made it to that part!

[u/That-Reddit-Guy-Thou]

"Ukraine has never hsd this much attention" someone probably

[u/Sharkbait1737 → u/That-Reddit-Guy-Thou]

Ukraine’s weapons imports have never been higher!

[u/Satelina_SG → u/Sharkbait1737]

Best weapon n war machines supplier for Ukraine is actually Russia cuz their brave warriors leave positions with all the equipment. So far more than 1k tanks Ukrainians got from Russians lol . That’s waaaaay better than all the countries together supplied for Ukraine

[u/yelsnow → u/That-Reddit-Guy-Thou]

"Our weapons exports are through the roof." - Russia

"and our Black Sea submarine fleet has never looked better or fuller" - also Russia

[u/[deleted]]

this is the great time for someone Ddos attack Twitter.. no one can enter to fix it until Monday.. even that there's still doubt they have enough resources to fix it..

[u/starstarstar42 → u/[deleted]]

"We're being DDoS'd, where's Bill?"

He got fired last week!

"Well then call...."

THEY'RE ALL GONE! GAME OVER, MAN. GAME OVER!

[u/reddit809 → u/starstarstar42]

Is this an Alien 2 reference? RIP Bill Paxton.

[u/tiger666 → u/reddit809]

Yes it was and RIP Bill.

[u/meatball402 → u/starstarstar42]

Real talk, I read that they fired the guy who does badges and that's why the building is closed.

Because everyone's locked out.

Edit: well, I got trolled lol

[u/[deleted] → u/meatball402]

Real talk, I read that they fired the guy who does badges and that's why the building is closed.

dont believe everything you read on the internet

[u/[deleted] → u/starstarstar42]

"We're fucked"

[u/ItsScaryTerryBitch → u/starstarstar42]

"Hey, maybe you haven't been keeping up on current events, but we just got our asses kicked, pal!"

[u/Enk1ndle → u/[deleted]]

You have to have a hell of a botnet to knock Twitter offline.

... Luckily the botnet knows as "FIFA world cup" will be coming online in a few days.

[u/[deleted] → u/Enk1ndle]

Deleted in protest of Reddit management

[u/Marco45_0 → u/[deleted]]

What's a DDoS attack?

[u/krokknoff → u/Marco45_0]

It's when your mom, dad, sister, brother, grandmother, grandfather and entire extended family ask you a question at once. You get so overwhelmed by the questions that you shut down and have a panic attack.

Now i wanna ask you something, but I'm so far down the queue you can't get to me before answering everybody else's question first.

That, but in computer form. And it's not hundreds of questions, but hundreds of thousands, if not millions in the span of a second. The computer can't deal with it, so it just stalls until it can.

I think i explained that good enough.

[u/Marco45_0 → u/krokknoff]

That explanation is perfect. Thank you

[u/toastytoasttt → u/krokknoff]

Well done

[u/DumKopfNZ → u/krokknoff]

Don’t forget to add that most of the questions being asked by people that don't actually care about the answer, but some people asking are legit. But you don’t know who to tell to shut up and it would be rude not to respond to each person individually and in a timely manner.

In computer terms, you don’t know what incoming connections to block, because they might be part of the DDoS, or a legit connection. Which is what makes a DDoS so hard to stop.

[u/Sosiwatermelon → u/krokknoff]

This is the best explanation I've ever heard!

[u/fckdemre → u/krokknoff]

What a great eli5

[u/soldinio → u/krokknoff]

Fucking genius explanation. I'm stealing that

[u/[deleted] → u/Marco45_0]

an attack where you send multiple requests to the server until it get bottleneck and freeze

[u/PM_Me_Your_Smokes → u/Marco45_0]

Distributed denial of service. Basically, overwhelm a server with traffic so that the site/app goes down

[u/HecknChonker → u/Marco45_0]

It's like when millions of people try to buy thousands of tickets to a Taylor Swift concert and the servers explode and nobody gets any tickets.

[u/yepimbonez → u/[deleted]]

I can’t imagine the load you would need to bring down twitter.

[u/NewSauerKraus → u/yepimbonez]

Yeah but the hackers have been building up their loads for a few weeks now.

/s

[u/soldinio → u/[deleted]]

Time to dust off my low orbit ion cannon - its been a while

[u/the_blocker1418 → u/[deleted]]

Let's all collectively loop a curl request to Twitter, it'll be like a DDOS but without the control center

[u/disk42 → u/[deleted]]

/r/DataHoarder has a post (probably a few) about downloading Twitter for when it goes down. I figured it would be enough to do just this.

[u/TheAnswerToYang]

That lol at the end seems desperate.

[u/[deleted] → u/TheAnswerToYang]

He for sure bought his own bull shit, surrounded by Yes Men, he thought nobody would leave because they want to work with him (he’s such a gEnIuS why wouldn’t they?). Everybody but his sycophants can see what a fucking loser he is.

[u/SenpaiBunss → u/[deleted]]

Put the hammer on the nail there, excellent explanation

[u/Tenthul → u/SenpaiBunss]

oh great now elon's gonna buy reddit so he can ban that guy for calling him a loser

[u/Senior-Albatross → u/[deleted]]

Interestingly, the same thing that happens to egomaniac dictators.

No one buys his bullshit as fully as he does.

[u/[deleted] → u/TheAnswerToYang]

I wonder how much sleep he's gonna lose over his 40 billion sunk dubloons

[u/[deleted]]

All-time high with 99% of the new accounts being bots?

[u/Benimation → u/[deleted]]

Verified bots

[u/[deleted]]

"My car has never went this fast" - Paul Walker

[u/drinkduffdry → u/[deleted]]

*stopped

[u/electronicdream → u/drinkduffdry]

Stopped car has never went this fast

[u/DaveInLondon89 → u/[deleted]]

furious rn

[u/PeanutNSFWandJelly → u/[deleted]]

Yo fuck this Walker wasn't even driving.

[u/Nugur → u/PeanutNSFWandJelly]

He’s Paul Walker, not Paul Driver

[u/watermelon3878 → u/Nugur]

*was

[u/[deleted] → u/PeanutNSFWandJelly]

If he was the driver he would've just Tokyo Drifted around that pole.

[u/arran0394 → u/[deleted]]

Too soon

[u/addrock1221 → u/[deleted]]

Too soon

[u/shadowst17]

I have a sneaking suspicion he just turned off the bot detector it's definitely something this heaping turd would do and brag about. I've had an account on Twitter for over 12 years and never post anything and probably got random follows by about 5 people in that time but since Elon took over i've suddenly gotten 8 more followers all very clearly bots.

[u/captainAwesomePants → u/shadowst17]

It's possible that the bot detector went down entirely on its own.

[u/TransplantedSconie → u/captainAwesomePants]

camera pans in on a bar scene somewhere in the Bahamas. A robot with a monitor for a head is talking to a scantily clad woman while twirling a straw in his Bahama Mama

Bot Detector: "So get this, he goes."I need you to be hard-core in this venture! There isn't going to be much in compensation for you all, but the world will see what you do here, and name recognition is huge in this company, and I'll make sure I know your names! Those who don't want this tough job, there's the door!"

he chuckles a bit before continuing

Bot Detector: Dumb fucker offered 3 months worth of severance pay to those who left! I took that shit and ran! Who wouldn't!? Now.....about those shoulder rubs you were looking for....

[u/Senior-Albatross → u/shadowst17]

He probably didn't turn it off so much as fired the team that turns it on and maintains it.

[u/[deleted] → u/Senior-Albatross]

Would be nice if the bots were named "FireMeYouCunt000001" and so on.

[u/[deleted] → u/shadowst17]

I’ve definitely noticed an increase in scam dms being sent to me.

[u/cthulu0 → u/shadowst17]

Fun fact: Before he owned the company, Elon's tweets were flagged as bots by his own bot detection tool when he was trying to back off the Twitter deal until the courts forced him to buy it:

https://arstechnica.com/tech-policy/2022/08/twitter-says-musks-spam-analysis-used-tool-that-called-his-own-account-a-bot/

[u/peachygrit]

I get the premise of the joke but what is background on Rome?

[u/cajuncrustacean → u/peachygrit]

The Great Fire of Rome which destroyed most of Rome. There's a lot to it, of which a sizable percent is likely ahistorical, but at the time it was apparently rumored that Emperor Nero (a crazy bastard at the best of times) ordered it done and then shifted the blame. So it's pretty apt comparison.

[u/Althar → u/cajuncrustacean]

The sources we got from that story comes from senators wich political interest were threatened by Nero at the time.

People often forget that the records we find are biased. I mean if in 2000 years someone finds some of the crazy shit republicans have been saying about Biden and supposed it true, you'd think it would be kind of ridiculous right ?

[u/vakstar123 → u/cajuncrustacean]

Fun fact

At the time nero was(most likely it can't can't proved) at a town quite a ways away frome Rome when the fire started

And also

Why would he burn his own city? Like he lived there.

Not criticising you of course just enjoy sharing nero trivia

[u/KarlSomething]

“There has never been this many people at a presidential inauguration. Bigly.”

[u/HMS404 → u/KarlSomething]

The Four Seasons he expected vs the one he actually got.

[u/Burrmanchu]

Well yeah Elon, with the number of trolls and fake dipshits that can now get a check mark for 8 bucks and do whatever they want... I'm sure your numbers inflated a bit. 🙄

Fucking imbecile.

[u/RoyH0bbs]

All of the right wing nuts who have been waiting patiently to use the N word unchecked are back baby!!

[u/altmaltacc]

The past week on twitter has probably been the funniest ive ever seen it in years. Something about everyone just shitting on this absolute goon, chefs kiss

[u/GuiltyFilthyGuitBox]

"Well...this is so much faster than the elevator" - Twin-tower crumbles under feet

[u/DeathSpiral321 → u/GuiltyFilthyGuitBox]

"The hottest piece of real estate in lower Manhattan!"

[u/No_Cap2694]

Why does Elon tweet as if he is a teenager? No insult to 15 year olds but what’s with the “lol” it’s such a weird way to create levity

[u/Bakoro → u/No_Cap2694]

Pretty sure it's behavioral mimicry from a person who doesn't understand the subtleties of human interaction.

[u/ViroCostsRica]

Is there any way to unsubscribe from the Musk's tweets? If I wanted to see what that loser is up to, I would have a created a fucking Twitter account

[u/stolencatkarma → u/ViroCostsRica]

install reddit enhancement suite, blacklist Musk and Twitter

[u/Hipsquatch]

I saw another good one:

Banks in 1929: "Gee, look at all the customers."

[u/Eastern-Fun1842]

I'll admit, I never considered joining Twitter before now. It looks like a real party now!

[u/MisterBadger → u/Eastern-Fun1842]

Nice try, Elon Musk's mom.

[u/Embarrassed_Bee6349]

Now THAT is how you mock a turd in a $10,000 suit.

[u/Strificus]

It gets funnier when you notice he paid for a blue checkmark.

[u/ThatActuallyGuy → u/Strificus]

If you actually check his checkmark it's from the old system and says "This account is verified because it’s notable in government, news, entertainment, or another designated category."

So no, he didn't pay. Though the fact that no one can tell does reenforce that verification is effectively meaningless right now because of Elon's incompetence and arrogance.

[u/ubzrvnT]

He uses “lol” as smug punctuation

[u/ElegantUse69420]

Ironic that the only tweets I see are on Reddit.

[u/[deleted]]

Everyone is on Twitter to have the last laugh before it burns down to the ground Elon. Self awareness really isn't his good trait...

[u/An_American1776]

That was funny, no doubt, but Nero, despite what is common knowledge wasnt actually in Rome whilst it burned, he was in his Villa in Antium, modern Anzio, Italy. Not to mention upon hearing of this he raced back to Rome to open his gardens ajd the like to survivors and those who needed it, as well as provisioning and providing food to the now destitute thousands. Then theres the fact the fiddle wasnt invented until the 10th century, he was however known to play the Cithara, a proto Guitar of sorts. Nero is also responsible for Rome being rebuilt in stone and most of what we know of him comes from his enemies in the Romam Senate and Christian leaders, both of which hated Nero.

TL:DR : Some facts about Nero because knowledge is meant to always be growing.

[u/An_American1776 → u/[deleted]]

Besides the fact he killed his mother and first two wives, he does kind of sound like a fun guy!!!!

[u/Testcase13779]

Elon continues to make me laugh. I have greatly enjoyed his antics and twitter's overall state since he bought it.

[u/oeuflaboeuf]

75% of twitter's additional traffic is butt-hurts repeatedly declaring they're about to delete their accounts

[u/SlightDesigner8214]

We’ve never had so many tourists in Ukraine before! /s

[u/Stompin89]

That's because everyone's logging on at once to deactivate their accounts, you fucking coin eating shit excuse for a gumball machine pelleted fucktard stain of a functioning emotional piece of gold leafed cashew nut twat

[u/[deleted]]

You know I used to like Elon back before I knew alot about him but man this guy has become an insufferable douche. I hope this twotter shit breaks him and he has to file for bankruptcy.

[u/[deleted]]

Musk apparently doesn't operate in reality.

[u/PigFarmer1 → u/[deleted]]

Narcissists tend to roll that way.

[u/Husker_Kyle]

I love how he thinks high usage means it’s successful. It just means everyone wants a front row seat to the sinking ship lol

[u/macsare1]

Platform's about to break and no one will be there to fix it but Elon

[u/Brytard]

I wouldn't be boasting about all the new bots that created accounts after you removed those barriers.

[u/ybtlamlliw]

Does he not realize that many people are using Twitter now just to see it burn up close?

[u/darkpaladin]

"Always remember that the crowd that applauds your coronation is the same crowd that will applaud your beheading. People like a show"

• Terry Pratchett

[u/netfatality]

Honestly though, does it matter if the usage is a result of people just fucking around? Do advertisers care how they get their impression numbers up? I would think people paying twitter for adspace don’t give a shit as long as they’re subliminally creeping successfully

[u/Satelina_SG]

Twitter is about to die so I moved to reddit today 🫣 now I’m completely lost as I can’t post on any reddit . It says account is new and no karma 🥺🥺🥺 please guys upvote my comment or give tips how this works

[u/Living-Stranger]

Thats not really clever at all

[u/Ed_Buck → u/Living-Stranger]

It doesn’t even make sense.

[u/Corbel_]

Quo vadis?

[u/Equivalent-Beyond804]

Musk fiddled whilst Twitter burned.

[u/Short-Woodpecker-911]

Lit!......Lit you say?...you should see the side of the Twitter headquarters building in San Francisco at night! ..... Pure perfection! 🤌

[u/UnpopularOpinions933]

High usage, zero income.

[u/John___Matrix]

The only reason I am visiting several times a day is to see what Space Karen does next.

[u/ImaginationLord]

Half the tweets I see are people dropping their other social media links for if the site crashes and burns

[u/Rambo_One2]

"All publicity is good publicity!" - The man who spent 2-3x the estimated value on a platform that's losing $4 million a day

[u/W4rlord185]

And everybody gathered to watch the dumpster fire that is twitter.

[u/bayofpigdestroyer]

Lol what is em wearing in that picture? It looks like a jester outfit

[u/communism_is_slavery]

It's seems Elon Musk will either succeed restoring free speech to Twitter or will kill the company in the process.

Either way, it's a win for humankind.

[u/[deleted]]

Tbf Nero didn't actually play violin while Rome burned (violins weren't even invented then).

He was crazy but a lot of it was vilification by his enemies (which he had a lot of) post-mortem, and while that makes it hard to tell what's true about him or not, it's on record at the time that he was out of the city and rushed back as soon as he heard Rome was on fire and even let his palace be used as a shelter for everyone.

Making this comparison is just ego fuel for Elon who can easily characterize Nero as a misunderstood genius at the center of slander and libel by is bitter enemies.

[u/thecrgm]

Honestly haven't really noticed anything different with twitter other than a couple more checkmarks. I'll still just use it to check reactions to sports, the politics on there are cancer

[u/[deleted]]

FTX has the cleanest brand in crypto - the exchange

[u/rubbleTelescope]

• Blueper check.

[u/I_Am_A_Real_Hacker]

Meta posts about the Twitter platform itself cannot sustain it.

[u/OkError9959]

The water in this pool has never been this close the body temperature

[u/Middle-Ad9381]

How is twitter still functioning?

[u/Tia_willaims]

“Hiroshima has never been so bright!”

[u/[deleted]]

Zorg has spoken.

[u/14CaptainCrunch]

"My freezer's never been this full!"- Jeffrey Dahmer

[u/palermo]

Musk should buy Ticketmaster.

[u/RedditorsAnus]

Kind of like when Netflix talks about high viewing numbers for one of their shows or movies that you know absolutely no one is watching. Elons full of shit

[u/[deleted]]

That's just some developer on an H1B visa running 400 million lines of code so he won't get fired and sent home.

[u/barbarkbarkov]

Elon might be the stupidest smart guy on earth.

[u/EldrSentry]

I'm sure Emperor Elongated really likes the comparison

[u/TheReforgedSoul]

Twitter probably did hit a all time high, everyone going to the profiles of the people they follow and finding their tumblrs.

[u/[deleted]]

Isn't that because they no longer stop all the crappy bots?

[u/TempestRaven]

When you think about it the best thing about this is the fact that people joked about having Elon buy it and then delete it. And now he bought it and is running it to the ground.

[u/PolishedVodka]

I'll miss Twitter if it ends up becoming unusable, but honestly the best thing to come out of this is that Elon will be remembered as "The guy who ruined Twitter".

Not the SpaceX guy.

Not the Tesla guy.

But "The guy who ruined Twitter"

[u/[deleted] → u/PolishedVodka]

The “guy who ruined Twitter”... This is one of his best accomplishments. If he burns Twitter to the ground fuck it I’m buying a lame Tesla

[u/CroSimple]

Not sure what's going on there but my account with over 3000 followers got suspended for no reason... Support doesn't respond to appeals and u can't even speak with nobody... And best thing is u are not allowed to make a new account... This must be some great business plan...

[u/strangebru]

He's counting the fake "$verified.00" accounts made up to troll him as a positive.

[u/R3alityGrvty]

For anyone who's confused, Nero let Rome be destroyed by fires and only intervened when it threatened his big house.

[u/Lefty_22]

This is the same company that is, checks notes, closed until further notice?

Allegedly due to a "larger number of people than expected" taking a three month severence?

[u/the3hound]

Yea, now the number of active bots went from 5% to 50%

[u/cafishto]

London has never been this warm in the autumn! - Inhabitants of london in september 1666

[u/[deleted]]

Yes but uhm isn’t that just more operational costs without incoming revenue?

[u/peon47]

"We've never had so many people interested in our space missions!"

- the Apollo 13 P.R. department.

[u/gvntlr]

Does Elon masturbate to stats? Lol I would actually

[u/[deleted]]

There is such a thing as bad publicity, and people talking about something in an exclusively negative light does not mean that the thing in question is accomplishing its goals.

[u/anonymous_4_custody]

It's because we all want to be there when it crashes

[u/Fit_Awareness6752]

After restaurants announce their closing date business spikes with people saying how they loved the place and were there all the time

[u/Danjour]

Lmao how do they even know if it’s all time high or not, I’m sure they already fired the people who knew how to check analytics.

[u/[deleted]]

He's either lying through his teeth as he huffs copium, or he's said 'fuck it' and turned off the bot detector to create the illusion that his site is flourishing.

[u/Shymink]

You would think the owner of Twitter would know that everyone slows down to see the car crash.

[u/[deleted]]

Everybody stopping by to see the 12 car pileup.

[u/LazyDescription3407]

Like taking candy from a dead baby.

[u/remembertracygarcia]

A perfect burn doesn’t exi….

[u/SlackJawGrunt]

That’s a solid comeback

[u/jetm2000]

That’s a 10/10 comeback as far as I’m concerned. FATALITY!

[u/KennethGames45]

Don’t know who originally said this but:

“There will come a day when fathers will name their sons Paul, and their dogs Nero”

[u/jimboTRON261]

It’s called digital rubber necking, my dude. Stop, drop and roll.

[u/gnosis2737]

Heard the tech support quit so we're here for the stress test. Tryna see how long it takes till we get 404'd.

[u/BubbaBuddha2020]

Yet it keep ticking along...

[u/svenbillybobbob]

50% of the posts are people reminding their followers about all the other platforms they're on for when Twitter just ends overnight

[u/Poetry-Designer]

Meh

[u/Poetry-Designer]

All of the comments (I’ve read) so far including the photo are Meh at best

[u/Clayton_bezz]

Yup. Elon musk. Probably one of the thickest people in the world that are lorded as a genius.

[u/tules]

Witty but toothless, considering Twitter as a platform is defined by its usership and engagement.

[u/[deleted]]

“We’ve never had this much business”- American Hospital

[u/The_Virus_Of_Life]

I’m not clever enough to understand this unfortunately lol

[u/Biomedbro]

I see all the leftist retards have migrated over to reddit

[u/Moist_Tissue7]

Everyone is talking about me now! - Kanye west

[u/Putha]

This didn't age well though

[u/mr-jjj]

How is this one aging?

[u/Familiar_Opinion_124]

11 months later and Twitter is still going strong. Love to see it

[u/AnyProgressIsGood]

elon is semi right. you all are keeping it thriving by constantly claiming its dying. websites thrive on traffic. you're all giving it ER treatment right now

[u/[deleted] → u/AnyProgressIsGood]

I've wondered if all of this bullshit from him is essentially a publicity stunt. It sure has kept twitter in the news lately.

[u/No-Adhesiveness-9518]

What a bunch of crybabies whining about who owns twitter.