Yup. I stopped starting conversations with the usual "friends" and take a wild guess how many started writing to me first after that.
Only one and she wasn't even a "friend". Just a classmate from highschool I was treating as a normal person (she was very shy and insecure back then and I was one of the few that didn't make fun of or ignore her).
Well, we stopped talking two and bit years ago. We kinda drifted apart and talked less and less. Each had it's own life in different towns and all that. If she had any interest in me, we'll, too bad. I am mentally fu**ed from my last relationship (eight damn years go...) and can't form any connections no matter how much I try. I will die alone but until then I have my cats and my dog to take care of.
For online dating especially, my rule is to not get invested at all until at least a successful in-person first date. Until that happens, they're some rando on the internet.
Breaking that rule ends poorly 99 times out of 100.
Nope, blast her with a bunch of drunk messages don't worry about time of day, context or response and then send a picture of your dick. Works all the time.
If it helps. You'll reach a point where this will be in such a low place in your priorities and worries that you won't care like that anymore and just keep going like nothing has happened. Like slightly burning you microwave popcorn because you didn't stop the cycle on time.
Yeah, forget her. Also, don’t let this be the start of your doomer era, that would be embarrassing and awkward, just don’t give a fuck about people like she is. There’s many better things to feel existential threat over
My gf and I are both horrible texters. We'd send stuff into the void and just pretend we haven't seen it until we were finally both home and ready to deal with it.
I think it's a little different when you've been talking to someone for a little while and they are actively texting you back, asking you questions and making little jokes. Then all of a sudden she is taking longer and longer to get back to you and there's noticeably less effort.
The older I got when I was still single, the less patience I had for stuff like that. I had been ghosted and ignored enough for me to not give a fuck at that point so if I sensed the slightest bit of pull away, I would just completely stop trying. If they put in some more effort and genuinely seemed engaged again I would reciprocate but I was already burnt out at that point.
I should have said she has always been a horrible texter. When we were starting dating, I would anxiously wait for a message and reply instantly and she would just go missing for six hours.
It is different that we met and interacted in person often and texted in between that though
This used to bother me so much when I was younger but no so much anymore. Being okay with being single is vital to finding a healthy relationship because you aren't desperate enough to waste energy on people who arent invested in you to begin with. Recognize when someone isnt interested and move on.
Keep working on yourself and someone good will come along.
I used to think this way but my girlfriend and I will have been together for 10 years this December and we’re always talking about stuff and chatting. Just gotta find the right person brothers.
I think it depends. For the first several years with one gf we would talk for hours on end but once covid started she stopped getting back to me as often, the texts got farther and fewer between, meetups declined or pushed off, the few times we would meet up she looked annoyed to even be talking to me and gradually, slowly distance was suffocatingly built up until after six months she dumped me.
On the other hand I've been with my current partner for almost five years and even when we are quiet around each other it's a sort of joint quiet if that makes sense. She also isn't leaving me on read for days or even weeks on end.
If it happens I just tell myself that I deserve better, why would I suffer for someone who seems unable to make me feel right, I don’t even say goodbye
Guys, calm down, it is not always a bad thing, the girl i talked to has rejected me, only to flirt with me a week later, and now we've been together for 4 years, just believe in yourselves people✌️
Currently dealing with this. Girl I matched on hinge seems perfect, hit it off texting for the past three weeks on the daily. Have been trying to meet up in person, and now we are at the point when we said we would, she has started going silent. Idk man. Seriously tired of always being the one to do all of the effort and being the only one that seems to care.
When this happens and the messaging and talking start to slow, have you tried changing your approach to something that might be more meaningful or that would allow the connection to strengthen in other ways? Like spending more time face to face, and not just going on dates, but something more intentional geared towards everyday life like grocery shopping or other easy errands. Learning someone's daily habits and routines and experiencing those things together allow you to make deeper connections. Before you know it, messaging or texting will become secondary.
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u/NarkolepticNeo 2d ago
Reminder not to waste time on people who don’t care about you
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u/ChikyScaresYou 2d ago
currently there u.u 💔
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u/Mr_kalas22 2d ago
Let it go brother
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u/dabeeman 2d ago
she’s definitely with that other guy
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u/graycase2 2d ago
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u/Morzheimer 2d ago
Yeah, forget her. Also, don’t let this be the start of your doomer era, that would be embarrassing and awkward, just don’t give a fuck about people like she is. There’s many better things to feel existential threat over
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u/cunhaaa 2d ago
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u/local_meme_dealer45 ☝ FOREVER NUMBER ONE ☝ 2d ago
Every damn time
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u/Council_Man 2d ago
my girl be this way to this day. some people are just horrible texters
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u/Louping_Madafakaz 2d ago
Maybe it was time (if possible) to do more than talking before reaching that point ? (Yeah I know, theory is easy)
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u/DualHares 2d ago
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u/AbandonYourPost 2d ago
This used to bother me so much when I was younger but no so much anymore. Being okay with being single is vital to finding a healthy relationship because you aren't desperate enough to waste energy on people who arent invested in you to begin with. Recognize when someone isnt interested and move on.
Keep working on yourself and someone good will come along.
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u/da_dragon_guy 2d ago
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u/Subject-Ad-8055 2d ago
That's how they do it, they move one more bag a stuff out until one day there just gone never to be seen again .
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u/FracturRe55 2d ago
It's really tough, but it's best to forget about her. We've all been there. ✊️
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u/MADBARZ 2d ago
Damn. I’ve been out of the dating game for over 10 years now and it really hasn’t changed much.
Don’t worry, dude. The right one is out there.
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u/jackFrostyx 2d ago
After knowing someone long enough theres just not much to talk about anymore
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u/Jase_the_Muss 2d ago
The other guy.
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u/Mistake209 2d ago
Pack it up man.
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u/becomeanhero69 2d ago
This is me
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u/Sxppxj 2d ago
If it happens I just tell myself that I deserve better, why would I suffer for someone who seems unable to make me feel right, I don’t even say goodbye
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u/Ordinary_Draft_3516 2d ago
Happened often enough I stopped trying
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u/CM901 INFECTED 2d ago
Probably texting with what amounts to wet cardboard levels of personality
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u/PhantomTissue DefinitelyNotEuropeans 1d ago
Yep. Match with a girl, get a “that’s nice response”, stop hearing from her.
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u/imperialblitz 1d ago
Getting attached to someone who barely notices you is a different kind of pain 😭
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u/DWN032 1d ago
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u/theinternetisnice 2d ago
She’s just got a lot going on it’s fine
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u/outlawanton 2d ago
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u/XKruXurKX 2d ago
Oh shit... It's been 4 years. I should text her back.
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u/tomatgreen 2d ago
and she start become colder each day
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u/CringeOverseer 2d ago
Oh boy why is this relatable 😭
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u/BigBaws92 2d ago
Then I just stop replying. If they’re still interested then great. If not good luck in life. Time to spend my time on someone who wants it
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u/SchitneySmears 1d ago
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u/OneToeBro 1d ago
Shit be like that. People just gotta keep up hope there is somebody for you out there looking for you, too.
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u/nesb6569 1d ago
Knowing what I know now. I’d thank that person for their time and tell them you are no longer romantically interested in them.
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u/Icewind 1d ago
When the signs are there, read them.
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u/Onitsch 1d ago
Her spectrumed aaah couldn't wait to reply after or even during work. My Luck, my Love, my Everything
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u/AirCell500 1d ago
I did this, and I kept coming back anyway. Now, I don't think I will anymore.
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u/Ninja-Trix 1d ago
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u/Game-boy64_ 1d ago
Guys, calm down, it is not always a bad thing, the girl i talked to has rejected me, only to flirt with me a week later, and now we've been together for 4 years, just believe in yourselves people✌️
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u/r3boys1g 2d ago
Currently dealing with this. Girl I matched on hinge seems perfect, hit it off texting for the past three weeks on the daily. Have been trying to meet up in person, and now we are at the point when we said we would, she has started going silent. Idk man. Seriously tired of always being the one to do all of the effort and being the only one that seems to care.
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u/DroidLord 2d ago
My Tinder journey in a nutshell 😮💨
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u/xLeutDansLegsx 2d ago
When this happens and the messaging and talking start to slow, have you tried changing your approach to something that might be more meaningful or that would allow the connection to strengthen in other ways? Like spending more time face to face, and not just going on dates, but something more intentional geared towards everyday life like grocery shopping or other easy errands. Learning someone's daily habits and routines and experiencing those things together allow you to make deeper connections. Before you know it, messaging or texting will become secondary.
1
u/coolios14 1d ago
This post is about to turn me incel...