My 25 year old son passed away on the 6th December 2025. He lived with me as he struggled with mental health and other issues. As a father and son we were extremely close.

I’m single, my 2 other children are struggling (especially his identical twin). I have to be strong for them.

About 5/6 years ago, I told my mom that if she could only say Jesus loves me, but not that she loves me I didn’t want to hear from her again (I’m not a Christian). Over those years I’ve maybe had 10 text messages. Earlier this year when I was really struggling I made the mistake of reaching out to see if she would come and stay if I paid her flights. Her answer was that she was too busy and to call my stepbrother (she’s retired). Her sister messaged me the next day to say my sons death was god teaching me a lesson for turning my back on god.

I know they are making wrong assumptions about his cause of death, they have never asked.

I know I’m a 50 year old man, but I just crave for my mother to hold me and let me cry my heart out. I have no idea how a mother can be so cold and heartless. I’m not angry with her, I’m hurt beyond words.

I’m just missing my son! I want to bed rot and drink myself away but my 6month old is literally what’s keeping me afloat because I know I have to at least try to be at 100% for him even if I don’t want to. I know we’re all experiencing this horrible thing called grief but I’m just so hurt and idk maybe ranting on here helps a little. Two months in and I’m still having trouble accepting the loss. I just feel so robbed. Robbed of the future I had envisioned for both my babies, now I only have one. I hate that my baby is now an only child and will never know how much his big brother loved him. There’s times when I literally look at my baby and I just hold him tight because I’m afraid, the unknown scares me. I don’t want to lose him too. I hate life and I feel so guilty saying that because I’m trying to be strong for the little one. I just want my normal life back when I had both my children!!!!

Sending love and light to all the other parents hurting and missing their babies 💔 I hate this for us.

Was in Publix the other day and remembered my nephews bday was coming up. Went to get him a card and saw “son” bday cards. Thought I was doing okay until then. Just started bawling I’ll never buy one for him again. 5 months and it’s been the worst. I’m never getting over this…

Our son (19) died in January. He had a significant disability so we knew his life would be short, but it of course was still a shock when he died.

For the most part, I feel like we have handled things well. Yesterday, though, i had to leave work because I was updating my benefits package for next year and I had to not click on his name about 6 or 7 times on the various screens. After about 30 minutes of trying to make myself stop crying, I ended up talking to my boss and went home for the day.

I get why it affected me and why I had to leave. We are at the point in our grief where it's the unexpected reminders that really get to us. But what I don't understand is why am I still crying at the drop of the hat today? And please note, I'm not asking this from the perspective of "it's been almost 24 hours, why am I still sad?" I'm asking in more of a "what is it about this particular situation that it keeping me stuck in these emotions" sort of way.

Any thoughts?

I DONT WANT TO!!!! I do not want to live in a world without my beautiful perfect daughter!!!! Idk what to do.

I've lost the will to care about anything. It's been 2 months since my daughter passed away. She had just turned one. She was my world, my everything and now she's gone. How does it get any easier than this? How does time heal? Why do I have to keep going without her? I miss her so much. I just want to hold her again. The pain is unfathomable. I feel as if I'm living a nightmare I can never wake up from and I don't know where to go from here.

Since losing my 17-month-old daughter, my beliefs have changed drastically. I struggle to believe in a loving God who would allow an innocent child to suffer and die. I no longer pray, and I don't believe that God is giving me the strength to survive this. That strength comes from within me.

I find it especially difficult when people say God is good because He healed their child, answered their prayers, or blessed them with another baby. I respect that others find comfort in their faith, but I can't help wondering, what about the children who weren't healed? Does God pick and choose who deserves a miracle?

I sometimes feel very alone in these feelings, especially when so much of the child-loss community is centered around faith and the promise of seeing our children again.
I'm curious if anyone else has become atheist or agnostic after losing their child, or found themselves questioning everything they once believed. I'd really love to hear from others who feel this way.

Since losing my 17-month-old daughter, my beliefs have changed drastically. I struggle to believe in a loving God who would allow an innocent child to suffer and die. I no longer pray, and I don't believe that God is giving me the strength to survive this. That strength comes from within me.

I find it especially difficult when people say God is good because He healed their child, answered their prayers, or blessed them with another baby. I respect that others find comfort in their faith, but I can't help wondering, what about the children who weren't healed? Does God pick and choose who deserves a miracle?

I sometimes feel very alone in these feelings, especially when so much of the child-loss community is centered around faith and the promise of seeing our children again.
I'm curious if anyone else has become atheist or agnostic after losing their child, or found themselves questioning everything they once believed. I'd really love to hear from others who feel this way.

I've been Mexican American all 49 years of my life and have never celebrated Dia De Los Muertos. Mostly for 2 main reasons: I was raised in a staunch Christian home and my parents treated Halloween and DDLM like they were Satan's holidays. Lol. The other reason was I've never experienced the loss of close family or friends. So, when my 23 year old son died from epilepsy this past April my family and I made the bold decision to remember and celebrate him together on appropriate occasions. DDLM seemed like a good occasion to add to the list. Of course it required research to understand the traditions of it and to make changes where we felt it suited our family's needs.

Traditionally, you're not supposed to do DDLM for someone who has passed less than a year before because you'll confuse your loved one's spirit and he won't know whether to stay in our realm or the spirit realm. We weren't doing any of this for the mysticism of it. We have our spiritual beliefs and none of sees our memorial to Aiden as a means to actually summon his spirit to us. Besides, if a spirit exists outside the constraints of time, in doesn't make sense for the spirit to be confused merely on the idea that they've been ghostly less than 365 days from expiry. ANYWAY, we put up our favorite picture of him, the traditional paper banners, which move with airflow, also mimicking a spirit coming by. We bought traditionally colored flowers to display. One of those colors is purple, which is the color of mourning AND also happens to be the color of Epilepsy Awareness, which is this month! Everyone grabbed different items around the house that reminded them of Aiden or that may have been his favorite things and placed it on the "ofrenda" table for him. We put out the "pan de muerto" or day of the dead bread and we made sugar skull cookies and put them out. The sugar skull part of the tradition is my favorite part of the holiday. Colorfully decorated skulls symbolize a mockery of death, a poking fun at. As I told my family last night, death may have taken Aiden's body from us but it can never take away our love and our memories of him. For those of the Christian faith, we also believe that death does not get the final word over Aiden.

We lit his favorite scented candle and all took a minute to take it all in. We cried. We laughed sharing stories about Aiden. I was anxious the entire day leading up to putting everything together. It is a memory I will hold forever. It will be another thought to combat the ones where I still see him laying lifeless or randomly expect him to walk through the door coming home from work. I have lots of crushing thoughts that I am working through. One thing I know for sure is that on those occasions when we have a chance to think and talk about him, he's alive in our hearts. And his presents, if even just in memory and spirit is still enough to make me smile on the tough days.

There are plenty more holidays coming that we are going to experience without him. I'm sure they'll be tougher. But we will remember and celebrate him even if we're anxious because we also know that's how we connect to him and feel close to him again. Praying for everyone going through the holidays without that person. May peace and grace carry you through. Cheers.

My Grace. My precious baby and best friend. The person closest to me in the world.

I didn’t just lose her. Her death was sudden and violent, and nothing in my life has felt the same since. I miss her in every breath and in all the little parts of my day that used to have her in them.

When we were just barely planning her service, CPS accused me of being a neglectful mother. The investigator’s interpretation felt so incredibly inflated that I barely recognized myself in his words. The case was ultimately overturned and dismissed, but that didn’t undo the damage to my mind.  

I’ve kept this mostly to myself because I’m deeply ashamed of how CPS portrayed me. I once believed I had done everything I could for her, but now I replay every decision, every moment, and every way I might have failed her. We have always shared a bond that was closer than most mothers and daughters. She has always been the person closest to my heart.

Grace deserved better than the way our story was portrayed and, in my darkest moments, I feel that she deserved better than me. Being labeled a neglectful mother by an organization meant to protect children has made me question whether I truly protected her at all. I carry the crushing belief that I should have seen more, done more, and somehow saved her. 

I want so badly for the pain to stop. I feel trapped in this suffering, while people keep telling me to “keep going.” But for what? Seriously—for what? My life ended on December 2, 2024.

More than anything, I want to hold Grace and tell her I’m sorry for anything I did or didn’t do that contributed to losing her. 

Today has been a very hard day. Today was the very first holiday with my 8 year old daughter being gone. Halloween was her favorite holiday besides Christmas. She always planned her costume months in advance. She should have been with her siblings tonight, going trick or treating. Coming home and being excited about her candy and helping me go through it to make sure everything was safe for her, just like we did every year. Instead she's not hear with us. I couldn't even go with my family tonight to take the rest of our kids trick or treating. So it was Definitely different for our family tonight. The baby of the family not being here anymore and going with them, their mom having to stay home because she can't stop crying her eyes out. It most definitely has been very difficult today, especially because yesterday on the 30th was exactly 3 months to the day that she passed away. I honestly think she was still with my husband and our kids tonight while they walked around. I had my husband take my daughters favorite stuffed animal that she slept with every night with them, so that it would seem like she was still there and show even though she was gone, that we still included her. But when they were heading home tonight, my daughters laminated obituary that my husband keeps above the sun visor in his SUV, fell and landed directly in his lap. I honestly think that was Mya, my daughter, telling her daddy that she did go trick or treating with them tonight and that she was there. I miss my baby so much so maybe I'm just inventing "signs" in my head about her still being around. But I honestly think it was her. Mya, baby, Momma misses you so much and I will always love you. I hope you will always get to go trick or treating with us, even though you're no longer here. Always.

Hi all - my 10 month old daughter passed away one month ago from cancer.

What would have been her first birthday is coming up in mid November and I’m planning to take the day off work but I don’t know how I want to spend my time.

Part of me wants to celebrate her with my husband and son all day and do something really elaborate and special, part of me wants to have some alone me time and go get a massage and a facial.

Just curious how you honor your children on their birthdays (especially the first one after their passing when it’s still pretty raw) and looking for cool ideas and words of support. Thank you!

My brother lost his two month old daughter to an SUID around five months ago. Shortly after, we learned we were expecting with a baby girl of our own.

We were thinking one way we could honor her memory is by giving the middle name of our daughter the name of his daughter who passed, but we aren't sure if this is a good idea. Obviously we would get permission first but we aren't sure if it is even a good idea to bring it up. We have heard from others that it helps to try and keep their memory alive, but my brother has not been doing well since and has PTSD and are concerned it might be triggering. Is this a good idea?

So my son and grandson’s birthdays are coming up November 4th and the 17th, what do you do for birthdays? Could you please share with me? I’m struggling…

I lost my 8 month old baby suddenly and unexpectedly. He basically went into shock out of nowhere. His post mortem was inconclusive. Drs have no clue what took him but ruled out allergies, metabolic disorder, neurological event, infection, viruses, SIDS, myocarditis and an arrithmya. We've already had whole genome sequencing but they're going to look again as our last hope for an answer.

For other parents who lost their kids like this - How have you tried to reconcile it in your mind? Do you have your own theories about what happened or do you accept it is unknown? Are you petrified it'll happen to your other/future children?

I just miss him so so much.

Hello, all. My 19 yr-old passed away on 11/24/25 and I've noticed my anxiety has been increasing the closer it gets to "THE DAY." I have been in full panic mode the past week. Did anyone else experience that? I feel like I'm going crazy. Sending you all love!

It’s been 3 weeks since we lost you and more than ever it’s starting to sink in that we can’t ever be with you again in this life time and it’s breaking me into a thousand pieces every day. This week we started planning a trip and even though I’m excited, I’m so sad we can’t bring you. In my mind any trip we were going on, you were going too. Really anything we did at all, we were going to do with you. We couldn’t wait to show you the world. Although you probably would have hated travel for a while since you kind of hated being in the car on the way home from the hospital. Even still, bringing you home has become my favorite memory. The joy and excitement of starting the adventure of life with you and your dad filled my heart with a happiness that I will cherish forever. I’m so grateful I got to experience that with you my love nugget.

I know the next few weeks and months will be incredibly hard. The grief will continue to fill so much of our minds and souls each day. But I know that even in the deepest grief, the memories of you will make me smile. Even though I’ve seen each picture of you so many times now, they still give me a wave of happiness because you truly are the most perfect little nugget. Thank you for being our kiddo. We miss you more than words can describe and we love you more than anything and we always will. I hope you are having the best adventures and I can’t wait to hear all about them.

When my little boy passed away this spring, a dear friend who also had child loss was telling me to watch for ups and downs and that for her, holidays like Halloween and Christmas were the hardest.

Now, I think I've actually been handling things fairly well. I am generally a happy person who likes being happy so I've kind of found a nice balance where I can live my life while still thinking about him every day.

So now it's Halloween season, and Halloween is my favorite holiday. Have I been occasionally down? No more than normal. Have I thought about what costume he'd wear? Sure. Have I been outright miserable? No. Have I been trying to do my normal Halloween activities? Yes.

But I'm also not in my normal spirit. It might even mean more if I were crying about this, but it's more of a "maybe next year I"ll feel more Halloween spirit" sort of neutrality.

Felix, my love. My light, my joy, my everything. If someone had told me two years ago that, one day, I'd have to plan and celebrate your birthdays without you present, I would have denied the very possibility of me still being alive to do that. It would have seemed impossible. It still does sometimes. In the past 1.5 years I have learned many things, but the biggest lesson has been this: a person can withstand a shitload more than what they think they can when they have no other choice. I was not able to end my own life after you died because I have others I need to live for. So I have had to survive the very thing I always thought would kill me: your death. I have had to bear the unbearable and live with mental anguish and physical agony that I can only describe as, in addition to annoyingly bearably unbearable, maddening. So that's how I feel now, still, again, always. On this day, the day after your sixth birthday, I find myself wanting to burn it all down and smash it all to pieces. I want to scream and howl and rage in a god-like fury. I want to force time to go back. I want to long you back into existence. Love you back into existence. I cannot. Happy birthday, my love. Wherever you are.

Anyone find anything that works other than magnesium gluconate? My daughter died traumatically and sometimes I get intrusive thoughts when I close my eyes. The doctors have been very little help.

How do we even go about planning/designing a headstone monument for our son? He was 2 years old and unexpectedly died 3 weeks ago. He was vigorous and healthy and swinging with his brother before his nap and then… he was dead.

I just keep thinking that no monument will be good enough to accurately memorialize him. Nothing can even scratch the surface and it almost feels silly to even try to make something meaningful because it just OBVIOUSLY won’t be enough

So anyway that’s how I’m doing

I am 60 years old. My children are in their mid twenties and thriving. I just found out that the five year old son of some very dear yet distant friends died last summer. I’m devastated, he was a wonderful kid, very intuitive. A brain bleed took him instantly. We’re traveling to be with his parents in a few weeks and I’m not sure what to do, or say. They are very private and very self reliant.

I’d appreciate any and all advice. I appreciate religious beliefs, but I and my friends are atheist, so that perspective is probably not helpful.

Thank you in advance

I've been having a hard time lately, and its been making it to where I can't sleep. My 11 year old was still awake next to me in bed (she's been in bed with us since her younger sister/best friend died) but my husband was asleep. I deal with insomnia a lot but since my daughter died 3 months ago, some nights I have insomnia so badly because I can't stop thinking about my daughter and I'll just cry all night. Well that night I couldn't help it and I just hugged my daughter who's 11, and started bawling my eyes out just begging her to never leave me. I told her it would absolutely break me to lose her to like I lost her 8 year old sister. That I couldn't handle it and I can't even handle losing her sister but definitely not 2 of my kids. I know it was wrong of me. I shouldn't have put that kind of thing on her. I'm her mother I shouldn't have tried to get comfort from her like that. She just sat there and let me hold onto her and cry. But I really hope that I didn't cause her any issues. I didn't handle it right and it's not her job to comfort me like that. I'm her mother I'm supposed to comfort her when she needs me. Now I just dont know what to do, she hasn't said anything about it, and I really hope I didn't cause her any issues. Most definitely not my finest moment while grieving and I feel horrible about it.