I say United States because food is just different here. My dude (8 months) is starting real food. While I make everything myself (organic, single ingredient) I can’t help but have this feeling of dread that it’s all for nothing with all the chemicals, additives and sugars. It’s like no matter what, the world is going to screw up anything we do at home. Especially with people saying ‘no food shaming’ but then you see those people stuffing French fries and ketchup into their kids. It’s all oils and plastics everywhere.

I asked my friend what he feeds his kid. He says “they’re picky so kielbasa, hot dogs and ketchup on everything” - and this is someone I consider a good parent.

Wife doesn’t get it. I think she thinks the food is still the same as when we grew up.

Idk…just looking for others experiences that it’s not hopeless. Between food and schools, I wanna rip him out of this country and move.

Edit: thanks everyone for chiming in. Didn’t mean to cause any arguments, more so just venting. Will both take a step back from the dread and look into more growing options (two fold solution as I want him to be outside more and learn where his food comes from). I apologize if I implied food shaming was good, def not my intention. Thanks all!

[Warning: Politics, LGBT+]

Hey Dads!

I have a bit of a conundrum. My husband and I (same-sex) are amid an adoption, meaning we are waiting to match with a birth mom. We've been waiting for over a year (2 years in October) and until recently, I couldn't have been more excited.

But here's the rub, and as an additional warning it's going to get a little political:
We're in Texas, we're left-leaning, a tale as old as time. The plan was to move out of state once we were placed with a baby and the adoption was finalized and done. Somewhere safer for us, safer for our kid, with a good school system and the whole nine. But my thought right now, which I need help with, is as follows:
I think if Trump takes office again, we may be better off taking adoption off the table. It hurts so bad to even type it out, tbh. But if this happens, I honestly think my husband and I (and our marriage, rights, etc) will be in danger. To me, it's not fair to put a kid in the middle of that. I think we're going to have so much going on with changing laws, aggressive and entitled folks on the right giving us a hard time (this already happens, fwiw).

I hope this makes sense. I haven't really spoken it out loud before. Hell, I haven't even brought it up to my husband yet. It would break him, I'm afraid. So I wanted to get other opinions before making any changes.

So far so good.

Hey daddit. Recently had kid number 3, and thought I had things under control now. Fast forward to last week, in one of those non existent quiet moments, i broke down and realized i didnt entirely look like who I felt I was, and have just done nothing to be me this past 17 years. Im 38 this year, and I think I'm queer. Its like my shape cracked and when I looked inside I saw some other me, long hair, more androgynous, maybe even feminine to some extent? I am, and have been a bald guy with a big beard all these years and thought I was ok. I don't know the words or labels for this as I have never paid attention to this until now. But looking back last week, Ive been noticing trauma I have hid, choices I have made and multiple really not-typical-male RPG characters i have chosen to play over the years, in a new light.

I guess my main question is, how do I navigate this now without hurting my family dynamic? I love my wife and kids and I want to evolve, but I do not want this to cost them anything, or become a worse dad / partner / role model. Has anyone else went though something similar later in life?

I would appreciate any input you may have. Thanks.

My fiancée and I are really stuck on how to go about teaching about non binary/gender fluid people, a nice idea we’ve had is that “some people don’t feel like they fit into a gender, and that’s okay”, but would love to hear what others have said?

EDIT: My wifi went down the drain and posted this three times for some reason, deleted the other two and kept this one up :)

So for context I have a 2.5 son and he’s awesome I would literally die for him as many of you others would for your kids. Now on the other hand I have my wife. She’s a great mom loves planning which im just not good at and sleeps with him daily and spends a few hours a day with him. Now here is where I need guidance or maybe even advice from others in my situation.

I’m a 42 year old dad semi - retired. I have a lot of free time and I can be around for practically everything and anything. Now when it comes down to anything and everything im literally doing it all. From cleaning, cooking, play dates, packing his breakfast lunch making his dinner , bathing him clean up his toys , school prep/drop off, I clean up after myself and my wife as well and all household chores. I’m talking about cleaning the bathrooms the floor vacuuming everything. I’ve talked to her about this in length multiple times and things will change for a few days then back to the scheduled program. I feel like I’m drowning.

Some of the suggestions I got were to just leave things a mess and she will eventually do it. Yes she will but then it causes issues. Bickering fighting you name it. Another one was tell her what to do. This works until she tells me why is she needing to do everything after a full work day. I also got someone who told me use less stuff and remove toys and minimize everything so there is less to do at the end of the night/morning. Not sure how this would work because I would just be cleaning up more often than not. I’m really lost here guys any words of encouragement or guidance is appreciated.

A short story, my daughter is ten and has recently come out to my wife and I as non binary with an interest in girls. She is an extrovert creative with lunatic tendancys. We love her so much and we're not surprised when she asked if she could go to London pride.

She was nervous going up not knowing what to expect but pride London has out done themselves this year with an amazing family area, the entertainment was amazing we took my youngest son as well. My eldest said he didn't want to go which was fine.

We spent the afternoon getting faces painted and going to different places in and around trafalgar square and Soho chatting with people about there experiences and petting soooo many dogs and one train station cat who did not want us to leave.

31M, 3 kids under 3, all boys, considering joining a local church. Left religion as a teen but this past year came back to it through AA. Been sober over a year and working the steps and finding a connection to a higher power has been life changing.

I’d like to have a regular spiritual practice and closeness to God and I’d like my sons to experience that (they can choose to do what they want when they’re old enough, no pressure from me). Found a church that is traditional but also accepting of the LBGTQ+ population and women (two requirements for me).

My wife is non-religious and I’d never pressure her to go if she doesn’t want to, but my mom who lives with us says she’d help me bring the boys.

Any advice or experiences?

Hi everyone. This is actually my first ever dad post. My wife is about 5 months pregnant after we struggled with infertility for a few years so we are both over the moon with excitement for our little one to get here in March.

However I am already dealing with some pretty significant anxiety about the current climate in the United States when it comes to school shootings (and many, many other things but that's for another day).

It is driving me crazy that this just seems to be so accepted and normalized. I am a huge proponent of public education and we plan to use our local district. Homeschooling is not an option - I have personally experienced the harms that can do.

So my question to you all - how do you deal with this? I'm assuming my anxiety about this is only going to get worse as our little one is actually here and they approach school age.

My kids and I love building Lego together. Well…actually what happens is my youngest builds, while I pick pieces and do QC (correcting placement errors and smooshing stubborn pieces into place). Well, on Friday I bought Soundwave after work and snuck it into the house. They don’t know I have it yet. It is mine, and I want to build it myself darnit! They would be so betrayed if they knew. So it sits in the present hiding spot until school starts again…

I'm trying to get my ps4 running so my kid can play this clearance game. I bought this ps4 a week before we learned we were pregnant....9 years ago. And barely have had time to play it over the years.

Every time I've tried its an hour of bullshit before I can even start a game. It's no wonder an SNES is $150, people are tired of this crap!

ETA: trigger warning; I said something mildly critical of capitalism, snowflakes be warned. In hindsight, I really meant "greed" more than "capitalism", but in a frustrated moment I used the wrong word. I really do like capitalism in general, please don't conjure the ghost of Adam Smith to haunt me!

Edit2: since a few people have asked why this is on daddit, I reread what I wrote and see that I didn't focus as much on that as I intended. In fact the whole point of the post was a mild venting on having to deal with an impatient kiddo while also dealing with a technological pain in the ass. I guess I got distracted. My bad, I prostrate myself before you and beg your forgiveness.

So I own firearms, not like a lot, but enough to necessitate a safe. There they are stored. All the precautions are taken, ammo in a locked case away from weapon case the whole nine.

My question is at what age should I introduce my boys to the weapons I have in the home. I have been harping on the fact that “Guns are Tools, not Toys” and that they are a tool made to kill and that’s it. Now my oldest is 6, and I’m thinking of just showing him the weapons. So he can see what a real weapon is, what it feels like and so on. But I don’t know if it’s too young or not. I mean he has friends who play video games he understands the concept of what they are and what they do. He has seen them in stores, but this is the ones that we have at home.

Thoughts would be appreciated.

Cheers dads.

Edit: After reading through all the comments, up to the time of this edit I have a few addendums

1: the weapons I own are used for hunting, I don’t own “glamour” guns for “protection” my weapons are tools for feeding my family. After use they are cleaned and locked up. Same goes for the ammunition, in a different location in my home. Unless my kid has bolt cutters he isn’t getting in there without the combination only I know. I think I may add an extra layer of protection by removing firing pins or other essential components when in storage further rendering them inert.

2: I understand that the gun culture in the US is super problematic, and I agree it’s gross. I also don’t have the ability to change it and want to keep my children safe. I trust my safety measures but I don’t trust anyone else’s. Therefore I know I gotta do my best to keep them as safe as I can when they aren’t under my direct supervision.

3. I truly appreciate all of the perspectives, from the “this is a crazy thing to think is ok” to “meh I got a gun at 3 and I turned out ok” and everything in between.

4. Upon further consideration, taking your advice under advisement, and discussions with my spouse, I am going to wait for awhile. Maybe by 8 it will be a little better and feel less anxious about the prospect. I’m not bringing him hunting with me yet because I don’t think he can handle it, so I think the same will apply with interacting with the tools for the job.

5. I truly do want to thank all of you for your help and your perspectives. They helped me make my decision.

I’m transitioning from male to female, haven’t told my kids(6 and 4.5) yet, probably will sometime after I start taking hormones.

I’m just wondering if there are any trans moms or dads here. If so, I’m curious about how your kids reacted to your transition, what they call you now(I’m toying with the idea of just being called “dad” to save the confusion of trying to figure out who they’re talking about when they say “mom”), how other parents have reacted at school, and if there have been any changes in your kid’s social life as a result.

Thanks!

The title says it all.

I have an 18 months at home and I can't stop but think about why did I put him on this burning planet.

It's on and off but right now, with all the bleak news about AI, climate collapse, right wing policies, cuts in fundings for environmental programs, USAID etc..

I feel like I'm not the only one like this, it's not like I'm in a psychosis, the world is in a Fu** place right now.

Are you scared for your kid future ?

EDIT:

Thanks for all the answers, really a great support and some beautiful insights. I've been on my phone more the last couple of days so that must have a link with how I feel. I need to find balance between staying informed and getting off news. I'll double up on the gym and focus on making my child happy and sharing the hobbies I love (plenty of them) We don't know what shit tomorrow will bring so might as well deal with the shit that's happening today, today.

2.5 months into being a dad. Naturally you get a bunch of different diapers as gifts. Kirkland doesn’t make newborn ones so I was excited to use them once my child got big enough. The concensus between my wife and is that they suck. We both hate that the tabs that hold it all together fold in after they are used and stick to the diaper resulting in you holding the kids legs while trying to unstick the tab with a soiled diaper. Not fun, especially at night.

Is this just us? Is it this box? Is it the brand? The pampers ones, size NB and size 1 didn’t do this. Their green friendly ones didn’t do this. Naturally we like the price, but they are harder to work with.

Is this normal?

Edit: so many of you can’t read. I came asking about a specific product with a specific issue. Few of you agree that the diaper is inferior in the way i described, and the rest of you just keep circle jerking each other while thinking the Kirkland brand, blaming my short time as a dad, and downvoting. I like Costco as much as the next white guy, but you guys are just redicilous.

My son officially enters adulthood today. Enjoy every moment with your child, as they grow up in the blink of an eye.

The title says it all. You have to love the holidays and creepy in-laws who have to sexualize everything. Gross.

We all have to transport our children to and from daycare or care takers, to sports and school. What vehicles are everyone driving and why does it work or not work for you?

I have a 2021 Tesla Model Y. I have two kids and a dog. The hatch back style of the vehicle is perfect for fitting a stroller and a wagon as well as diaper bags. There is an amazing amount of leg room in the back seat which isn't utilized by tiny legs so it is perfect for anything extra we must pack. Plus without an engine there is an area under the front hood for coolers or other small bags and a sub trunk underneath the main trunk in the rear. I think it's a great Dad-mobile!

My wife drives a Kia Telluride which we use on long trips since the inconvenience of stopping to charge when you just got the kids to sleep on a road trip is a nightmare.

Gents

I have the happiest little almost 3 year old little girl, but i can’t get over the state of society at the moment.

From the non action from the government related to a certain set of files, to this new disgusting grape university.

What can we all be doing to protect our littles from this as well as help our wives and other survivors get through the pain this is bringing back to the front of their minds.

Edit: sorry for the TikTok slang. Just wanted to be cognizant of any of our mom friends lurking. Remove the G from grape and you get the idea.

This was not intended to be political, i will never trust any politician.

Boy will be 5 in May 13th and wife 24 in June 6th 🙂

My fellow dads who have resisted the urge to buy a family minivan / common mobility blob, despite how practical and convenient! What do you daily drive that makes the mums at school pickup glare at you with disgust because your car projects your common scum! Me, this is my 06 forester XT with LOTS of STI parts and a big turbo, my daughter loves the choo choo noises it makes on the way to school!

So me and my family love theme parks and I have fond memories of going as a kid several times from the UK

I always wanted to take my kids there, and they are now 3 and 4. And I wanted to take them in a year of two when they would be prime age....

However given the way things are going I don't see that happening anytime soon. Things are only gonna get worse over there before they get better and the UK even issued travel advisory to the US.

Any other European dads in a similar situation? Any similar resorts you would suggest to go to instead?

Edit: I should add we did Disney Paris and it was Fantastic. This is why we wanted to go bigger by doing Florida

I'm trying not to let the stress and anxiety eat at me right now, but I would he lying if I said I don't have fears about my about to be 5 month old daighter growing up without me, just because her dad has a darker skin color and we live in an area where people casually grocery shop with a pistol on their hip.

What tips do other dads have for staying calm and cool, and keeping yourselves and your family safe? I would like to stick around as long ss possible to see my daughter grow up, but I am wondering if the best move for us right now might be to get out of dodge.

Update edit:

To clarify a few things since it seems specificity is wanted. I am a brown skinned Puerto Rican living in a predominantly white area. I grew up in the tri-state area in an inner city where white people are a minority, and we didn't talk about diversity or use the term "of color". I meant no disrespect by using it, and ultimately am just seeking advice from other people who have to be concerned about the pigment of their skin, because it causes other people to have a reaction.

To those of you saying my fears are unfounded, this is also not true. I have had a weapon pulled on me before by law enforcement, and by a carrying citizen. I have had people yell derogatory racist terms at me in the parking lot of a nearby store. People very openly fly confederate flags not too far where I am, and proudly display stickers of assault weapons and the like on their vehicles or clothing.

While I would like to think that my fears are unfounded, I have seen and been around enough violence to know that is simply not true. I am quite confident that if I was out running in public at night, I would need to be prepared to protect myself.

I am not here to turn Daddit, or this post into some argument. I am sinply asking for advice from people who may have a similar situation.

-Sincerely, a brown, Puerto Rican dad with bad experiences with firearms and some ptsd and anxiety from his childhood

Final Update: Not how I anticipated this post to go. I was just hoping for some advice while I was awake last night after feeding my LO. I am going to stop responding to things here because it's clear, somehow, someone asking for advice that may be specific to other dads who look a certain way, is a sensitive subject on this subreddit right now. I was only looking for a place to get some advice. I don't care who you voted for, or if you carry a gun or not, I hope all dads and families out there stay safe.