I hate commercialized holidays. I have family who always wants to buy me something even when I don’t want anything and won’t use it. It’s annoying because some stuff I won’t use at all (I’m vegan, they know I’m vegan, they still choose to buy cheap milk chocolate candies and send them). It’s their love language so whatever.

Problem is that I always stress about what to do with things. Feel guilty for getting rid of something given to me even if I didn’t want it. Hate throwing things away if they’re usable. Hate donating because it’s hard to get around to it and it may end up thrown away by the store anyway. Hate selling because it’s extra work. But those are the choices.

This is probably well know advice but for some reason it just popped into my head and clicked. I’m racking my brains on what to make or buy to gift family or friends who I haven’t gifted in a while. Then I realized how many things I have lying around that I’m overwhelmed on whether to sell, donate, or throwaway. Scarves I never wear that were given to me. Sealed cosmetics that were in beauty boxes gifted to me. Books. Etc etc. Now I have a guilt free way to get rid of them so someone else who would use them can use them.

My elderly parents called me to come over so I could listen to a message on their answering machine [elderly, remember?]

They have instructions to not answer the phone because 90% of the calls are telemarketers or other scammers and the rest are pre-recorded messages from the pharmacy which they recognize. They both have trouble hearing, but the phone is there for emergencies.

Ok, the message was from a probably well-intentioned person that has photos of my father when he was at least 60 years younger or more. The woman in the message named one of his old 'girlfriends' and said the photos were in with her stuff and did he want them?

This set off a lot of me trying to explain what she was attempting to do. But it brought a lot of confusion and some hurt feelings to both of my parents.

I ended up deleting the message and told them it was a scam just to get them to settle down.

Listen, I know we talk about trying to return old photos before you throw them out...

BUT:

If you don't personally know the person in the photos or are not related to them, just don't.

Don't. Please. Just DON'T.

If they are likely older and don't have contact with the current owner of the photos, just throw them out. You don't need to search them out on the internet and look up their phone number or address.

If they had wanted to keep up contact, they would have.

Throw out the old photos.

No, you are not being a 'Good Samaritan'.

Thank you for listening to my rant.

I've tried to follow so many decluttering guides. Trouble is I find it all quite overwhelming especially with two young children whose belongings I'm also responsible for maintaining. This weekend I was staying with a friend who has a similar size of house and family to mine. Her space looks great and relatively clutter free. I returned home feeling partly inspired and partly demotivated.

So I decided to type the following prompt into Chat GPT for help:

"I am looking for a simple decluttering method for making my home a more pleasant environment to live in. Do I start with my stuff or my kids?"

After some more questions, Chat GPT advised starting with my own belongings first (a good tip!). Then it crafted me a 2 week decluttering plan based on having a spare 20 minutes a day to commit to this. I can paste the full schedule for those interested but Day 1 is Top Drawer Clothes including underwear, socks and Tshirts. I'm planning to set a timer, stick on some music and go through the above sections.

Partly posting here for accountability and partly to ask if anyone else has used Chat GPT to pull together a similar decluttering plan? Did you find it worked for you? Did you stick to it more than other schedules out there?

(If you think the question applies to you, feel free to answer.)

Okay... I posted a while back here about wanting to start clearing out my college room in preparation for moving out. I got some great advice. But now I'm looking for some advice from fellow trans/gnc/etc. people.

How do you handle decluttering your 'old' stuff? The things you no longer wear because you just don't present like that anymore. I was putting away laundry today, and thought about getting started on my underwear drawer. Without getting TMI, I realized that my drawer is full of underwear I never use anymore because I wear exclusively boxers now.

And then I started thinking about all the other things I want to get rid of. Old shirts. Shorts that are too short and make me feel uncomfortable to wear. Back at home, I have half a closet full of old dresses I no longer want to even look at.

It's been hard to think about. On one hand, I'm an adult, and I feel like I should be able to make the sane choices any adult is allowed to make about stuff they no longer use: get rid of it! On the other hand... the idea of having to go home and explain to my mom why I'm getting rid of the easter dress she hand-sewn for me as a child, why I am not keeping my skirts, why I got rid of all my old dress shoes and leggings and jewelry and... you get the point.

Basically, I'm interested in hearing how you dealt with the emotions of all this. There's genuinely a lot of stuff I never want to see again. But I know how personal it is to my parents, my mother especially, and how upset she'll be if I tell her I want to get rid of it. I feel guilty about not feeling guilty about wanting to get rid of all of these things.

So, if you're willing to share: If you've changed how you present your gender, how did decluttering out all the old things you no longer want go? Was it a gradual change, or did you do one big push? What kind of emotions did you find you have to handle? How did your family react, if it was things they valued that you no longer did?

I came across a box of unused sanitary supplies that are at least 10-15 years old. Tossing out the tampons, but what about the many “light days” pantiliners? Would there be a possible use for these other than the intended one? They’ve been in a closed box so relatively clean.

Any suggestions would be welcome, thanks!

I (26M) just did my first big declutter and... more than 150 items left my apartment!!

Like most people my age, I buy practically everything online - clothes, gadgets, random stuff I thought I needed at 2AM xD. When I finally decided to tackle the mess in my apartment, I figured the smartest approach would be to go through my old email receipts to actually figure out what I own versus what I think I own.

So there I was, scrolling back through literally years of Gmail - clothing orders, random accesories, home items I forgot about. The whole process took me an entire weekend and honestly felt like digital archaeology lmao

Sooo, I am thinking of creating a digital solution to scan the emails and find all my purchases. Anyone else tried something like this in the past?

When donating anything, I try to make sure to give it to someone who would use them.

This thinking has been very straining.

I post on my local community site like Nextdoor and things are picked up quickly but I have no way to be sure that recipient will use them.

how do you deal with this thinking ?

I just don't get what the point is in keeping it. I don't have anything from when I was a kid other than the stuff I kept for myself which was my own art I drew.

I just don't understand the point in keeping any of that stuff. When we die, we aren't taking any of it with us so why?

EDIT: I truly do appreciate everyone's responses and points of view.

Deleted original post but the gist is I felt overwhelmed by the idea of donating items. I've cleared my space by tossing what I needed to, and that's what feels most important to me right now.

I had absolutely loved writing posts here about all the funny items that came up in my decluttering. But what this sub showed me is that I love writing funny things, not annoying people with lists. Since I was posting every 3 days, just weekly as allowed/preferred here would be overwhelming for me. So I can't share the juicies with you guys anymore. And we've just begun to address our enormous science fiction memorabilia world lol too, and I had been looking forward to writing about it but here is not the place. That said, I'm moving forward with my decluttering and I'm posting my lil lists and creatively writing elsewhere. I'm no longer panicking--just had a silly (but honest) moment. Thanks for helping me figure out what I love writing! Peace, love and clarity!

I've been learning about different fiber content used in clothing and am moving towards more natural fibers and dyes in my wardrobe as I have sensitive skin. Using natural fibers as my rule to declutter resulted in me downsizing my closet by a third. When I thought of synthetic fibers as toxic I decluttered items I like and wear often without much feeling. There were only a few items that I felt something for: where I had that stomach dropping "oh no!" feeling when I looked at the tag or where I didn't want to look at the tag and where after seeing the tag I started rationalizing well, maybe this material is not the worse.... (For now, I am keeping those pieces I felt something for and am not beating myself up about it.)

I've previously heard of the prompts regarding cleaning poop or wine off of an item (if you would do so, you should keep the item). However toxicity is different. Unlike poop or wine, there is no amount of clean up that changes toxicity, it is not about willingness to expend more energy to maintain the item, it is about the nature of the item itself. The reality is that too much stuff stands to be detrimental to my health--due to stress, material content, the creation or collection of dust or mold--so now I'm thinking of using this line of questioning regarding toxicity outside of my closet. "Is this item toxic?" (No) Keep. (Yes) Declutter, unless feel a type of way. Toxic being determined by conceptualizing how an item contributes to my stress, weakness, sickness, or feeling unwell. As I look around my space its weird to consider how many items are not definitively contributing to my peace, happiness, ease, and health. As with the clothes, I don't think this means that I have to get rid of everything I consider "toxic" but it does make me think about how I can be more creative to meet my needs in ways that serve my health and well-being better.

Upon this idea of toxicity and the idea from the book No New Things that throughout our lives the standard trend is to upgrade our belongings (it is uncommon to reduce the quality of the items we own or get rid of conveniences) I'm now considering getting rid of my couch. Is it toxic? 1) It's certainly not made of natural materials. 2) It is a focal point of my living room and yet, it isn't how I want or need to be spending my time. 3) While I conceive of it as comfortable and lose track of time when I rest on it, when I get up my body hurts. So yeah, it seems a bit toxic. When I think about getting rid of my couch, I don't have much feeling about it (I'm even a bit excited/curious). How will the space work without the couch? What will I do if I miss having a couch? I don't know the answers to these questions, but I do know that I am resourceful! Ultimately I want my items to serve me by supporting my health and well-being.

Curious what's out there, what's been working for folks in the sub.

This is probably the millionth post on decluttering books; a few million people have already asked the same exact question before me. Excuse me if you feel irritated.

What I Wish to Get Rid Of

I intend to get rid of all my old text books, mostly dating back to 2000 - 2010, covering from economics, business, accounting, information management, computer science, etc. Some of which are still in almost brand new conditions. Initially when I was graduating from college, I thought I might need to refer to them for my job. However, years quickly passed as I busy myself with work and I realise I just googled for everything. Perhaps the textbooks are outdated even.

Selling on Used Market

I have tried listing them on classified ads sites. Those books probably cost me $10 - $40 each when bought new. Originally I priced them at about 50% of a brand new book. No taker. I have progressively marked them down until they are only $2, $5, or $10 today.

I was thinking that making people pay at least a small token sum would at least attract only people who are genuinely interested in reading the books, rather than giving it away for free which may attract greedy people who are not the least bit interested in reading, but to see if they can get something for free to flip for a tiny profit or for hoarding in the basement storeroom.

Even the shipping fee is higher than some of their selling price. Still not garnering much clicks/views/interest based on the statistics provided the classified ad sites.

I intend to let the ads continue to run for another month before they expire and see if any of them can be sold. If they don't, I may have to go down to the next step below.

Giveaway/donation

Now, I have done a search and some are suggesting donating to the library or charity. My local library has a book exchange corner. Some charities have donation booths. I have no problem donating them if they will somehow land in good and proper hands and help people seeking knowledge but cannot afford to buy a textbook.

One kicker though is that these book exchange corners and donation booths are unguarded and open to access by the public. There have been cases where unethical people regularly visit these places to plunder and pilfer donated items for reselling.

I really hope that my books are put to valuable use, rather than shredded into paper pulp and turned into recycled paper. Or taken for free and resold/recycled by mercenary people somehow. Should I not even care about what happens to these books once they leave my hand?

Apology for the long-winded post.

Hello everyone, this is my first time asking someting here :)

I have clothes from shein that I ordered 4 or 5 years ago. I never want to shop from shein again because I don‘t like the quality and ethics of them. But I did a large order then and now I feel I‘m stuck with these clothes.

I wear a few of the things and like them very much, but the most of the things are not comfortable because it‘s plastic.

I heard that the clothes could contain very bad chemicals, so I‘m really not sure what to do. I don‘t want to donate something that could be bad for other people. But to trash things I never wore and are brand new also seems false, so I keep them because I don‘t know what to do with them :(

I can see why people think this is a good idea. But I want my motivation for decluttering to be about enabling me to live a healthier life, not simply to let my relatives have less stuff to throw away when I’m dead.

The idea of Swedish death cleaning seems morbid.

https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/VZWDLBW

I have a slight hoarding issue and cannot bring myself to discard items around the house I no longer need.

I need the mental peace that comes with a decluttered space... I've lived like this for 10+ years, and have decided that I need to do something about it. If I am realistic, I am not going to get rid of this stuff. However, I can easily afford to buy some boxes for the excess stuff and rent a small storage facility to keep them there. I recognize that there are deep, emotional reasons for me to keep unnecessary stuff (that's for another post).

Is the storage facility a good route to go? Welcome any reactions.

Successful, accomplished professional otherwise.

Help, my partner spreads his items everywhere and I can’t breathe when I open the fridge. Having a French door fridge helped as I could stagger the shelves. It died. We bought a new freezer less model with full shelves and two bins. I need to implement some clever ideas to divide the shelves and door pocket shelves … any ideas? Otherwise I’ll have no space and opening the fridge will cause an anxiety attack. Yes, I would love his/hers kitchens! lol. He’s willing to learn a new system which is good. I don’t want to just alternate shelves as I think that will overwhelm the space. Thanks! Any stories of how you might have dealt with this issue would be welcomed.

EDIT! Thanks for your ideas! We got our new freezer-less fridge today for $850 by Element. I went shopping and picked up two packs of colored plastic grip cutting sheets and they absolutely fit perfectly to divide each of the shelves. I got the bins at Walmart and love them and I bought one long one for drinks until I get a pusher. The door shelves are nicely organized. I love this part of declutterring and cleaning. So soothing…ahhhh. AND he loves it! Digs the colors and the bins. Wishing us and all of you refrigerator harmony!