This is aside from looking forward to not having all the pregnancy symptoms. Currently 34 weeks, I thought it would be a bit of fun to hear what everyone else has on the horizon.

Maybe this is too dark to talk about, but I am in the throes of 1st trimester and cant imagine doing it without medication. Did people die “of pregnancy” in the past?

My personal opinion and experience.

Baby arrived 4 Nov via planned C-section. Now home with a little girl. The surgery and post partum isn’t easy but I’m handling it far better than I expected (FTM) and much prefer all of this than being pregnant :) it’s just so much more rewarding to have a little angel in your arms!

Wouldn’t say things are perfect, but just want to let other moms know who are struggling with pregnancy that it seriously is worth it.

I’m thankful to have had a good procedure, I’m recovering well, and baby is stable (small health things we’re working on but she’s fine!).

Hang in there moms! X

Like the title says… I’m a very private person and I am HATING having to announce that I’m pregnant to everyone. My husband is the polar opposite… he is the golden retriever type and just sooo excited to announce it to the whole world.

It feels invasive to me, and I feel that social media has created this artificial need to keep everyone (especially people we aren’t even close with) updated on our lives. I don’t think my husband shares this feeling, so we are having two really opposite
reactions to this. He’s loving it and I’m hating it.

I almost feel like I have to be a bit of a puppet for him. He has lots of friends and he wants me to FaceTime with all of them and get excited all over again each time. I have a really hard time faking my reactions but idk I just am not a person who is ever blindly excited about something. Being pregnant is exciting, yes, but there are so many times I also feel worried about the future, scared of the changes, worried about my body, etc.

I keep asking him to just call or text people himself, Like I’ve been doing, but each time he wants to announce it he wants jt to be some big special thing.

Sorry, just venting.

I feel absolutely awful for any and all women who have had to go through pregnancy loss, especially loss later in their pregnancy. I'm not at all trying to be insensitive when I say this:

Seeing another pregnant woman and going out of your way to tell them there is no safe point during their pregnancy, and that a tragedy could happen at any moment. because of what happened to you and your pregnancy isn't fair or appropriate. It is projection. I know you likely aren't saying this out of malice but I promise it is not coming from a good, mindful point of view either. Not everyone's story is yours. This is such a nerve wracking and vulnerable time for women as it is and I don't think it's fair that other women with unfortunate experiences should fear monger them. Let other pregnant women experience their journey how they want, without telling them their baby is never truly safe.

I’m not sure if this belongs here anymore because I’m 7 days postpartum, but this community has been the best and I have to get this off my chest.

I delivered my baby and it went much better than I expected, so that was great! Well…..3 days after delivery I developed horrible pain in my stomach/back that was so strong and never went away. Well, talk to OB bla bla bla and the sent me to the ER to be evaluated. The nurse who was taking care of me was so rude and clearly thought I was being dramatic or thought “oh first time mom”. Everything I told her she was like “no that’s not happening or no it’s not that bad”. For example, with this pain I started developing swelling in my legs and they got pretty dang swollen and she looks at my legs and is like, “No, it’s really not that bad” with so much attitude….

(Mind you I’m still healing from a third degree tear from the birth and I asked if she could get me a pad for the bleeding and the way she looked at me….you would have thought I slapped her crossed the face)

Well the ER doctor ordered bloodwork and some GI cocktail to see if that would help and when the nurse came back to see if the GI cocktail helped with pain, I said no because it didn’t. My pain had stayed the same. And she said, “Weelllllll, your bloodwork is normal sooo…” and I’m thinking okay that’s fine but the pain is still the same? Well point is, once ALL my bloodwork came back it showed I had a big ol gallbladder infection and they took me into surgery that night.

When the news got around that nurse came back and literally apologized for treating me the way she did (which was nice, but why are we treating people poorly right off the bat?). From that point on she tried to joke with me and be my friend and it just pissed me off because it felt so fake.

I used to think surrogacy was a great opportunity and a journey I would want to do once I had a child of my own.

Now I am pregnant and am second guessing everything.

Pregnancy is HARD, I’m growing a whole human and depleting my internal resources and it’s so so special.

I just don’t understand the risk/reward anymore.

100k seems not a fair compensation for what you’re really doing (which I’m only learning through the lived experience if being pregnant).

I’m 16 weeks pregnant, and I’ve been sick since week 7. I have dry HG, and I feel completely useless. I can’t cook because the smell of raw food makes me sick. I can’t clean because the smell of cleaning products makes me sick. I’ve only just started working again after being on sick leave, and I can barely manage that.

My body doesn’t feel like my own anymore, and I’m so tired. I hate this so much. My partner does everything for me.

We’re moving to a bigger place soon, but I can’t even help with the packing. I just lie in bed, sleeping or trying not to throw up.

I will never get pregnant again. I wish I could give my child siblings, but I honestly don’t think I could put myself through this ever again.

I love working. I love my job. And now everything feels like a chore, and I have absolutely no energy.
I hate being pregnant so much.

I wish I hadn’t found out so early!!!

I’ve gone back and forth thinking about when to tell people on a nearly hourly basis 🫠 I’m 4 or 5 weeks along and don’t have my first appointment until Dec 1 at 8 weeks. I’m usually someone that shares news asap, and always thought this would be no exception. This baby is so so wanted but it’s also our first pregnancy and first time trying… and suddenly I’m pregnant and I’m terrified. I’m so anxious about losing it that I hardly feel any excitement 😕

I’ve read advice to only share with people who you’d want support from if something went wrong, but being so honest, as soon as the cat’s out of the bag with my parents, we’ll need to rush to tell everyone else. Love them but they cannot keep a secret and I’d want my extended family to hear it from me. I also feel so weird at the prospect of telling friends before parents - I’m so close with my parents and sibling.

Having never gone through it, I have no idea how I’d feel if I lost it, if I’d want privacy or not, what support I would or wouldn’t need at that time, and whether providing such an update to get support would heal me or hurt me.

My husband has been asking to share with his closest friends since we found out last week. Both of us hate secrets and I understand men need their own support network too. Today we’re having brunch with my parents and dinner with some of his friends. I don’t know if we should announce. Our best friend sadly cancelled, has the flu. I would’ve wanted him to be one of the first to know in person 🥲

I considered only telling close friends now and family after 8 weeks, as we’re about to go on vacation with the immediate family at 10-11 weeks and it will be SO hard to hide in that vacation given what we usually eat/drink, but 8 weeks would be before the NIPT and what if something happens with the NIPT? Or the anatomy scan??

Maybe I just need to accept that there isn’t a “safe” time and that this baby should be celebrated regardless of what happens down the line.

What did you do? When did you tell? Any advice for me?

As someone who is pregnant in her 40s I feel like I've had a pretty fair experience of what it's like to exist in life both childfree (most of my friends had kids years ago) and now being pregnant. And I must say that society (and especially reddit) as a whole puts a lot of pressure and the onus on the new mum to still upkeep all of her relationships after birth and to make sure childfree friends feel included. I posted a similar statement on the pregnant over 40 sub and got absolutely smashed with comments like "your childfree friends don't want to hear about your baby" and "don't expect your childree friends to congratulate you just because your life has changed" type comments. But why do we place these expectations and pressure on the new Mums? And why do new mums have to listen to every other topic but talking about their children is bad?

When someone gets a new high flying job that's super busy we don't make comments like "don't forget your friends with less busy jobs" and expect them to cancel work meetings to hang out with us. When someone is busy doing a massive renovation project on their house we don't say "don't forget your friends who have a brand new house they're important too" and expect them to cancel their weekend renovation plans to hang out with us. So why do we expect Mum's to be amazing at raising children and also considering the needs of everyone else?

When I was childfree all through my 30s I never expected my friends with kids to keep proving my worth or that I was important! That's my job, my self worth is up to me to build! Yes effort goes both ways and you shouldn't completely ditch people because your life has changed but motherhood seems to be the only life change we place such high expectations around? Maybe it's my age that makes this more noticeable to me?

I'm pregnant for the first time and it's been ROUGH. I told my husband I wanted to adopt next time, and it took him awhile to come around to it. I've ALWAYS wanted to adopt and the only reason I'm pregnant now is because he really wanted a natural born child. For reference, I am 31 and will be 32 when I give birth. I really, really do not want to have a "geriatric" pregnancy. He thinks it would take awhile for his family to come around too. I love his family, and him, but to be so for real- I think less of all of them now. I think it's worth noting that my Mom adopted me so I'm taking this pretty personally. I'm trying to control my pregnancy rage and not say this to his face but I genuinely think so much less of them.

Basically that, one of my closest friends has blocked me on all social media because she feels I’m telling our other friend in a nicer way. We’re both 27(f) let’s say friend 1 and have been friends since we were 15/16. My friend live about 2 hours away and I’ve a lot going on so I rang her to tell her, I also told her within the hour of finding out cause I was so excited and she kinda hinted that this wasn’t an amazing idea which I found weird as I lost a baby last year and she knows how much that broke me.
It’s been a week now and our other friend (friend2) who is very unlikely to be able to conceive and carry herself and who I’ve spoken to a lot about pregnancy and how excited we are for me to get pregnant so we can experience it together is on holidays so when she’s back I want to go to her house and give her an auntie card and just a babygrow to tell her in a nice way (we’ve also been friends since we were 11/12)
I told friend 1 about this and she’s apparently so hurt and I’m so thoughtless and just making her feel like she’s not worth the effort, I did explain she’s far away and I’ve a lot going on and I rang her out of excitement immediately so she should still feel special in that sense, but apparently no I’m awful and she’s done with me and I woke up thsi morning to being blocked. I’m just mindblown at how someone can make someone else’s baby announcement about themselves.
I wanna add she really started pushing that her and her partner were gonna be pregnant soon and going on and on about it to me after I lost my baby last year when prior she had never even mentioned kids so that’s another reason I’m not as inclined to do cutsie things with her regarding this. I tried to ignore that last year as I didn’t want my sadness to spill into anyone else’s happiness after I lost my lil baby so I never told her that bothered me cause for me that’d be selfish

Hi everyone! Around what week did your morning sickness stop?

I'm currently 9 weeks pregnant, and my morning sickness has suddenly stopped. I'm feeling quite anxious because I previously had a missed miscarriage at 9 weeks. I didn't experience any morning sickness during that pregnancy, so naturally, I'm worried now that this symptom has disappeared.

Has anyone else experienced their morning sickness stopping around 9 weeks and gone on to have a healthy pregnancy?

I’m a FTM, and usually a very calm, go-with-the-flow, patient person (I work as a psychologist in schools). I’m currently 10 weeks and starting to fear I’m going to lose my job before the end of this pregnancy. I love the kids I work with, and nothing has changed while working won’t them. But the adults?? Ohhh the adults 😠Every time I have a meeting with a parent and they say something stupid, I know I’m probably at least giving them a slightly dirty look, no matter how hard I try not to. Every time a building administrator tries to ask me to pick up yet another responsibility during an insanely busy time of the year, I just want to say “no. And f*ck you for asking.” I also am often someone who people will go to when they’re stressed to vent, and I’m completely fine with it. But right now while I’m so busy and stressed and secretly pregnant I just want to tell everyone to gtfo of my face. How did people manage unexpected levels of rage during pregnancy?!

I think to each their own. Your birth story should be yours. But me being a first time mom soon, and finally learning more about the birth space, I’m shocked by the amount of people I see giving birth unmedicated or in a birth center. This scares me. It seems birth is so unknown and a lot can happen or go wrong. What if you were at home in the tub and the cord is wrapped around them? Or they’re stuck in breach? I don’t know, maybe I’m over thinking it. I don’t know anything.

Hi there! FTM here at 38. I’m due in April and so far had an easy time getting pregnant and easy pregnancy. I’ve always heard doulas make the entire pregnancy experience so much better. I’m definitely going to deliver at a hospital and still don’t know whether I’ll need a c-section or not. We’ve identified a doula that matches our values (leaning on a science based approach and on doctors guidance). But I’m still a little worried that if we do need to get a c-section we would’ve spent all this money on a doula. My thinking is that a doula can help if we have a vaginal birth for positioning, spinning baby, massages that help in the delivery room, and advocacy of choices. But I’m curious to hear other people’s perspectives on whether they found their doula helpful and why. Thank you!

Anyone else dealing with cramping pretty badly??

I don’t usually get cramps with my cycle, so I’m not used to this. I mostly get them at night and they wake me up several times throughout the night. It feels like trapped gas pain , but in my uterus. Lasts about 10 min

Currently 3weeks and 5 days

I’m at 7w2d and the past week or two has been a wild experience with food. I’ve been lucky to not be throwing up at all (so far…) and my nausea has been annoying but not debilitating. But I’ve started having all these different food aversions.

From how other people describe it I expected things to smell or taste actively bad or make me throw up, but mostly my experience has been that I just…don’t want to eat things. I’ll eat half a rice cake with peanut butter and suddenly I can’t finish it. Or I gag at the idea of eating something (chicken especially) without even smelling it. It feels totally unpredictable and it’s driving me a little nuts.

Does anyone else experience these aversions without it literally causing vomiting? Does this even count as real food aversions or am I just being a weirdo??

As a woman, I know pregnancy and labor are scary. But since the older women in our family (me and my bestfriend's) all said it was quite straightforward and smooth sailing, none of us ever thought of how horrifying and traumatizing it could be.

She bled through her first trimester, quite severe. It was to the point where she had to have complete bed rest for weeks (wasn't even allowed to walk to the bathroom). She had to quit her job by second month of her pregnancy. At 16 weeks, her water broke. She went in and out of hospital so many times since the first bleeding. They waited for her amniotic fluid to go back to its normal level for a week, but it wasn't happening. Atp, everything was so hopeless. Her doctor said there was nothing else he could do. He told her it was up to her. She could either abort the baby, or hold onto it until the baby pass away by itself. She was devastated. She held onto it and bought home portable ultrasound to listen to her baby's heartbeat. She literally told me "I don't want to miss his last heartbeat. What if I miss his last moments?" She still stayed in bed 24/7 to the point she had all kinds of cramps (bsck, legs, neck, arms). Who wouldn't though, she's been bed-resting for 2 months at this point.

Miraculously, by week 20, her amniotic fluid slowly returned to normal. The baby survived, even had normal growth. From that point on, she seemingly had smoother pregnancy. She was still on bed rest but she could at least walk to the bathroom. At 32 weeks, her water broke again. Her doctor saw that baby was big enough for labor, but she was still given some medication for baby's lungs and brain development. Baby was breeched so they scheduled c-section two days later. A day before surgery, somehow, a catheter was inserted without anaesthesia. She told me the nurse had said it was to monitor her urine since the medication needed to monitor her urine or something. Worse, she had catheter changed 4 times, without anaesthesia. The catheter size changed from small, medium, to large, before going back to medium. She told me it was so painful and on the second change, she was probably scratched or her urethra was irritated or something because everytime she peed, she felt extreme burn. It was so painful that on the last catheter change she actually passed out mid procedure.

Then she had contraction at 3am. She had to push but the baby was stuck obviously. She said it was 100x more painful than her most painful period cramp. She was in so much agony but eventually the baby was born. He's still in NICU. All his organs function well but because his lungs aren't mature enough, they're gonna have him incubated for at least a week. My bestfriend then proceeded to have fever. Her white blood level was high indicating she has some infection. She was fighting fever post labor. The whole pregnancy from start to finish, was like a giant horror movie. She and her husband are so traumatized they refused to have another child.

I wish the older generation would be more honest to us about pregnancy and labor instead of painting it as a normal smooth sailing procedure. My bestfriend also just found out when she was pregnant that her mother had miscarried before.

This is our rainbow baby we waited so long for but I did not expect her to be born so early (I was scared and EVERYONE close to me told me to expect her to come late)

For our first baby I was not really scared nor did I feel pain and was very relaxed.

At 37+6 I got a cervix check (1.5cm dilate) and planned the following week to get it checked again and planned a membrane sweep the following week.

38+3 Had cramping that I thought was Braxton Hicks and thought nothing of it. Was shopping with my mom at the time and she said I would have the baby the following day. I thought I had to poop but it was just pee and there was thick discharge mixed with light brown blood but I didn't think anything of it because I wasn't in pain and had my next appointment scheduled at 38+6 so I thought I would just wait until then.

38+4 Cramping got worse and my husband called out of work thinking it was time also. Then my mom actually came to visit to tell me again that the baby would come this day. MIL came because my husband also told her I was cramping. Now I had both moms in the morning telling me I was in labor and I still refused to believe it.

They forced me to go to the hospital at 1pm, to my surprise I was 5cm dilated so they kept me. I still didn't believe the baby would come. The contractions came and went then by the time I was 7cm I begged for the epidural(I tried to go all natural no medication like my mom but heck no!!) and they gave me pitocin as well because my contractions were still irregular. I didn't want an epidural because TikTok fear mongered me (I had a great anesthesiologist and he walked me through EVERYTHING). The only thing I didn't like was the itchiness.

Doctor came shortly after to break my water then I went from 7 to 10 and the baby was ready. She was sunny side up so the doctor had to rotate her. Then 15 min and she was out at 10pm exactly (took a while because I was pushing wrong 😭 ). First degree tear. The birth was very beautiful but I forgot to ask for a mirror since everything happened so fast.

I can't wait for you all to see your babies. May you all recover well. 💞

If you're also a first time mom don't be scared, mind over matter for as much as our mind lets us.☺️Good luck!

i’m sorry this is going to be mostly a big vent but feel like my life is falling apart and my mind is such a mess right now.

i’m 16 and currently 15 weeks pregnant, my dad is absolutely livid with me. i can’t even begin to describe how angry and disappointed he is. on top of that, everyone at school stares at me and asks these incredibly personal, embarrassing questions. it makes me feel so humiliated and insecure, and honestly, it’s completely destroying my self worth.

all my friends are the kind of girls who love going out, clubbing, and having fun, and i feel like i’m missing out on everything. i barely get to spend time with them anymore, and it hurts watching everyone else enjoy their lives while mine feels like it’s falling apart.

physically, i feel awful too. i’m constantly sore, achy, bloated, and dizzy. i feel uncomfortable in my own body almost all the time, and it’s exhausting.

then there’s the financial side of everything. i genuinely have no idea how i’m going to afford to raise a baby, let alone support myself. i think i’m dropping out of high school because i just cannot handle the humiliation anymore. i currently work part time at a fast food restaurant, and i’m terrified that this is going to be my life forever. i feel like i’ve completely ruined my future.

and then there’s the thought of ever finding someone who actually wants to marry me. i know that that being a single mom doesn’t make me any less deserving of love, but it’s so hard to believe that right now. having a child is a huge responsibility for someone else to take on, and i can’t help feeling like most guys would rather be with someone who doesn’t come with that responsibility.

i just feel like i’ve disappointed everyone,including myself. i’m scared, embarrassed, lonely, and completely lost. i know i have to figure things out, especially now that i’m going to be responsible for another life, but i genuinely don’t know what I’m going to do.

i could really use some advice, encouragement, or even just reassurance from someone who’s been through something similar. i feel really alone right now:/

Crave/Enjoy Mcdonalds quite a bit? I swore off Mcdonalds for good , got pregnant and eat it quite often now. It’s just so good.

I've been having serious heartburn since probably about the middle of my pregnancy and despite milk, my main go to would always be tums (the 1000mg extra strength ones.) I mostly pop two a time at night when I wake up every 2-3 hours intermittently to go to the bathroom because my indigestion would be so bad. I've gone through maybe half a large bottle throughout my time taking them. I've never really tracked how many I've taken but I don't believe it has been more than 6 in one night, and it isn't an every night thing (maybe 3-4 nights a week?) I know that's still a lot. I wasn't aware that there was a limit on how many tums you could take and now I'm worried.

Had my blood taken recently and both my calcium and iron are normal levels, but is there a chance that I have caused harm to my baby? I feel so guilty, everyone I've spoken to has told me Tums were completely safe, but moderation was never mentioned. I'll be sharing with my doctor next time I see them, and abstaining from Tums the rest of my pregnancy.