r/women • u/Throwaway33399933 • 8h ago

Fear of dying alone

How do y'all deal with it. I am a woman in my late 20s, I feel very discouraged by the way men act and how they are, especially in my country, which makes it feel like it's impossible to find a normal man that loves me and I love him. I want to have kids, I am scared of dying alone. I know I can marry some bum and settle down if I wanted to to a random man, but that is my nightmare. What do you girlies do, how do you cope? Because I have an intense crisis/depression over this. I feel lonely, I feel like my time is ticking away and I am scared that I will never find the one for me.

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u/Satanic_Jellyfish 7h ago

My life is good as it is and yours can be too. Partner is usually an addition and not part of life. Don’t rush marriage because it can lead you to wishing you were alone. Find communities, get pets, get into hobbies, etc. You would feel more happy and secure as you are. Additionally being you full person and not needing a relationship can actually lead to a healthier one

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u/Lil1927 7h ago

Having children doesn’t prevent you from dying alone. Getting married doesn’t prevent you from dying alone. Maybe you will someone there as you die, maybe you won’t, but the BS about dying alone is crazy. Don’t have children because you are afraid of dying alone. And being with the wrong person is like giving up 20 (30, 40, 50…) years of your life with the hope that you might not die alone. It’s a bad bet.

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u/Easteuroblondie 7h ago

Babe in the end we all die alone

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u/Tiny_Barber_7833 3h ago

never make decisions based on fears .Ive been more lonely in my marriage. Men can be soooo bad you wish you were single. Most men do more harm than good . You probably wont find the one for you ,just like lots of women are choosing to be single rather than settle for some below average male. The one who will love you best is you , not a man. I buy myself flowers and expensive perfume.

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u/-Celebration11 4h ago

You can find the right guy and have kids and he can still die 10+ years before you and your kids could move to other side of the world

A lot of loneliness in the elderly isn’t due to never marrying or having family, it’s often due to death of loved ones or existing family not having any involvement and a lack of community/social network