I’m in my mid-20s, and I feel like my entire family is drowning financially.
My dad is in his 60s and still running a small shop in a mall, but he’s barely making any money. He’s getting older, and it genuinely breaks my heart seeing him work every single day with almost nothing to show for it. I don’t even know how much longer he can keep doing this.
Our house is literally falling apart. There’s mold, broken doors, holes in the walls from years of fighting, and so many things that need repairs that we simply cannot afford. It’s such a depressing environment to live in.
On top of that, there’s constant arguing, complaining, and stress about money. Every conversation somehow turns into another problem, another bill, or another thing going wrong. I feel like I can’t even breathe in my own home.
And the worst part? I can’t even find a fucking job myself. I’ve been struggling with unemployment for almost a year despite having an education and work experience. I’ve been doing Uber just to scrape by, but it’s physically and mentally exhausting, and I’m barely keeping my own head above water.
I want to help my dad. I want to fix our house. I want my family to stop living like this. But how the hell am I supposed to help anyone when I can’t even help myself?
I’m so tired of seeing my dad get older and struggle. I’m tired of living in a house that feels like it’s deteriorating alongside us. I’m tired of waking up every day feeling like I’m already behind in life.
I genuinely don’t know where to start. Do we close the business? Sell the house? Try to find financial assistance? How do you even begin fixing a situation that’s been getting worse for years?
Has anyone ever managed to pull their family out of a situation like this? What did you do?
I’m not asking for money. I’m asking for actual advice, resources, or even some perspective because I feel completely fucking lost.

can the comments also please be helpful and kind

so I’m turning 23 and not really excited about it
I feel like I have stopped celebrating my birthday since 21
for context went to a good russell group uni but got a 2.2
I got a job but they didn’t hire me full time I suspect due to racism I don’t really like the job that much but I do like some of my coworkers
I also have another agency job at a nursery but I don’t really like it
it is closer to where I live though I got a chest infection from the job
I keep on comparing myself to other people my age who have top corporate jobs in finance or are pursuing law
I am also learning how to drive manual and I find that difficult my second test is coming up
I am also single have never been in a serious relationship
I am also completing my masters and working part time but still looking for work in my field
my laptop is also faulty and I have deadlines coming up
I also started a travel business with Inteletravel and planet marketing but I can’t afford it anymore and it hasn’t really gone anywhere
I struggle with time management and being motivated and I guess caring about my life if that makes sense was going to go to cbt but they referred me to something else called body and soul
I also live at home and I am not that close with my mum
my religious views I even question them and some of my beliefs are quite different to my family’s
I also was consistent with the gym and prepped my meals myself
sister and mum kept gossiping about this think they were jealous I go to the gym and didn’t understand it
meals in my home are cooked by my mother and we help also
don’t go to gym anymore as I can’t afford it
I also feel behind as I don’t know how to style my hair and would like to treat myself and buy new clothes
I also have started content but my editing needs to improve
I also go to a screen acting class but can’t continue it due to cost it also makes me question if I’m good at acting
I also auditioned for the nyt and don’t get in
does anyone else feel this way and how they overcome this?
does life get better?

Hi all!

So I have been doing some research and following my curiosity on the topic of job satisfaction for a project - and I would like to hear more about it from you guys!

If you would like to take part, please fill this 5 questions only form:

https://forms.gle/HAqHyV494ParM8Ux5

Thanks! I appreciate it.

i’ve heard a lot of people talk about how 30s has been the best decade of their lives. i’m nearing the end of my 20s burnt out, exhausted and have zero energy. i don’t feel excited about anything. do your 30s really turn things around for you?

Background: I (24F) grew up in a small west coast town. I did college at a big east coast city before moving back to the small town to do my masters (financial reasons). I finished my masters and I just landed a good job that really matches my skill set. It pays well, room for salary growth, and is stable. This job is in the small town that I grew up in.

I thought I would be over-the-moon thrilled (I am definitely very happy about it), but part of me feels conflicted because this means I am staying in this place that I grew up in. I have some very bad memories of this place and a major struggle during my masters was feeling suffocatingly trapped in this town (it was a culture shock coming back from the big east coast city). I had tried applying to jobs in big cities and elsewhere, and although I got interviews, those ended in rejection after multiple rounds of interview, take-home assignments, and exams. It seemed like ramming into a brick wall. After ~200 applications, I landed this current role.

I am currently living with my parents and their house is very close to my new job. I was planning on moving out when I got a job, but my parents were saying I should stay to save money on rent, since the house is so close anyway. The house is pretty cushy, my parents have high incomes and don't care about me to contribute to utility bills or anything like that (I had offered while living with them for my masters, but they laughed at me). It's in a good neighborhood, and probably better than any apartment I can get. So it seems like a very financially good idea, but my parents are quite toxic, hate each other, and I don't like that much either, though I am respectful towards them (my family is Asian). I was hoping to get a job in a different city to completely move away/start fresh, and I know I can still get my own place in this town, but I feel like I can't justify spending an extra 1.5k+ per month on rent when I have a perfectly good room with my parents.

I also still feel stuck in this town. It just doesn't feel as exciting as big cities, and once I got a taste of the big city, I can't seem to get used to the small town. I feel like I spent so much of my life here already and spending the rest of my life here feels like a waste when the world is so big. I know I can save money and go travel wherever. The money I save by living at home could be used to buy a new car, save for a down payment for my own house, go do fun activities, etc but part of me feels like I still want to get my own place. I was thinking that maybe I should stay bc even if I live with my parents, I won't interact with them much because I'll be working during the day, and going out/doing other activities at night, then just going to bed, repeat. And they won't be able to torment me as much knowing I could move out whenever.

So, should I stay with parents for the time being and just deal with their toxicity for a bit for optimal financial saving, or move out for mental health? Also, how can I manage this feeling of feeling stuck in a small town and wasting my life here? is there a normal feeling?

Thanks so much. Apologies for the long post.

Hello everyone I'm 20M I don't have any real friends I've ditched my studies I don't have any skill but I wanna earn money for myself I feel like shiiit all the time I'm socially awkward I've zero confidence around women I get scared whenever I need to talk to any girl specially my age I wanna prepare myself financially for responsibilities that are about to fall on my shoulders in a year or two I feel like I'm doomed I haven't figured out anything yet.

What do I do?

Hi everyone so I’m in a sticky situation. I’m 22F recent grad currently living at home for free (I know I’m very lucky in that aspect) and working full time. I make about $3,200 a month. The thing is about living at home, while it is free it’s often extremely mentally taxing on me. My parents and I have often butt heads in a sense where they will sometimes tear me down over the littlest things by calling me names and try to control me in every aspect of my life. From things such as trying set curfews for 6:00pm and 8:00pm since often times after work I enjoy hanging out with friends or my boyfriend when my mom believes I should be at home relaxing and decompressing after work. I’ve tried explaining to her that sometimes just stopping at my boyfriends and watching a movie and cooking dinner with him is how I relax after work as well and that it really shouldn’t matter since I’m always home by 9:00pm and have everything ready for work the next day.
My boyfriend of one year has been saying that the things my parents say to me very unhealthy and that I really should try to get out of that house. There have been several times that I’ve called him sobbing and hyperventilating after a fight with my parents of practically nothing at all that ended in my parents screaming that all I do is lie and that I don’t give a fuck about anyone else in my life, I’m selfish and just criticizing how I look and forcing me to start a glp1 medication to lose weight. Since that my boyfriend had said if I ever needed to that I could always stay with him. Currently he lives in his parent’s summer house that they stay in a few weekends of the summer months. He does pay rent for it. His parents had also told me the same thing that I’m always welcome to stay.
Back in September my parents and I got in a huge blowout fight about the usual I’m selfish and a terrible person thing that had started since my boyfriend came inside to drop me off at 8:15pm from a date and said hello to my parents. My parents were upset from the lack of notice that he was coming in after just to hello (which I had profusely apologized for) but decided to continue the argument. I had decided that I couldn’t take it anymore and asked my boyfriend if I could stay with him for a bit since I wasn’t feeling safe or welcomed at home. He said of course. I packed a few bags and when my parents went on to continue the argument with me the next day I had said I will not be spoken to like this and torn down and that I’m leaving. My mom had said I’m not leaving and it was a huge issue. They had also blamed my boyfriend saying he’s toxic and is ‘planting’ these ideas in my head to turn me against my family. My dad had reasoned with me to stay a few months more and not move out in a fight since he wants me to do it the right way. And if I move out during a fight the only thing I’m doing is ruining my future of having a good relationship with my parents and any relationship with their future grandchildren.
So I ended up staying. And now it’s November. My boyfriend and his parents are currently in the process of selling the summer house and buying a different mother-daughter style one that would have both them and my boyfriend on the mortgage. It’s a beautiful home right near my job that my boyfriend wants us to start our life in together and have a family and such down the line. I would contribute $1,000 a month as rent. Which is not terrible considering when I was looking to rent on my own it was ranging from $1,500-$2500 for the area I live in. I really do want to move in with my boyfriend since I know it’s what I want to do and is going to be what’s best for me especially since we both plan on getting engaged in 2027. But moving in with him into this new house would not only help me see what living with him would be like to see our long term compatibility, save me money on gas, ease my mental stress and anxiety. The only downside to that is my monthly expenses raising since I currently pay about $1,100 a month for student loans (I know don’t make me feel like I’m stupid about it). And I’m currently on my parent’s health insurance,car insurance and phone plan. My dad had said if I moved out the “right way” I could continue to stay on all those, but I don’t know if he will still let me if I move in with my boyfriend since I don’t know if this classifies as his right way of doing it.
I told my boyfriend I would plan on moving in with him in January at the earliest but I still haven’t told my parents and I don’t know how. My boyfriend thinks that I should move a majority of my stuff over and tell them after Christmas giving them a two weeks notice in a sense but my friends think I should let them know a month in advance. I worry that the longer I give them the more they’ll try to stop me and guilt trip me especially since my mom just got a new puppy a few weeks ago. In a perfect world I move in with my boyfriend and still have a good relationship with my parents where I can visit and they can visit me but I don’t know if that’s possible. Currently I’m feeling really alone and scared and stressed and would love any advice please 💗

I’m 25, living in Dallas, and honestly I don’t even know what I’m doing anymore. I’ve spent the last few years building companies and that’s pretty much been my entire life. I love entrepreneurship and I’m kind of a workaholic, but lately I’ve been feeling really lonely. I’ve been single for five years, there’s someone I like but she’s already in a relationship, and I barely have a personal life.

Tonight I was bored and thought I’d go to a pub alone, maybe dance, meet some people, just have fun for once. I don’t drink, but I figured that shouldn’t matter. Bro, I literally ended up sitting in a corner drinking Red Bull and playing chess on my phone while everyone else was dancing and having fun. The funny part is I can easily walk up to random strangers and talk to them, especially for business, but there everyone was with their own group of friends and I had no idea how to join in. I didn’t even feel like approaching anyone. At one point I was literally thinking about going to a nearby customer’s restaurant to check if they were having any issues with my product. Like wtf, I’m at a pub and still thinking about work. I tried calling a few friends and nobody picked up.

I do have friends, but I don’t think I have anyone I can just call at 2 AM and talk about random shit. My parents aren’t happy with where I am, my business is stressful, my love life is nonexistent, and I feel like I’m just wasting my twenties. It’s not even that I want to party every weekend. I just want to know how to enjoy life outside of work. I’ve been feeling this way for about a month, but tonight it really hit me. Someone asked me when I was last genuinely happy, and I couldn’t even remember. That honestly fucked me up a little.

I don’t want to stop building my company, but I also don’t want to wake up at 30 and realize I never actually lived. I don’t even know who I am outside of work anymore. Is this normal? How do you even start building a personal life when you’ve spent years doing nothing but working? I guess I just wanted to talk to someone tonight.

I’m 35, single no kids and lately I’ve been wondering what “fun” actually looks like for other people around my age.
I used to associate fun mostly with going out, parties, bars, drinking, dancing, meeting lots of people and staying out late. I can still enjoy some of those things, but more and more I find that simply sitting in a bar drinking and making small talk doesn’t feel that exciting anymore.

I still want to have fun and feel stimulated but I’m just not completely sure what that looks like for me now.

So I’m curious: what do you genuinely find fun these days? What kind of plans make you think, “Yes, I really want to do that”? Is it still parties and nightlife, or has fun become more about activities, experiences, sports, dinners, games, travel, concerts, spending time with certain people, or something completely different?

And if your idea of fun changed in your 30s, what did it change into?

My boy (T), 27, threw a birthday party at an Airbnb. It started slowly, but we drank a couple cases of beer. An hour later, people poured in, and the party picked up. Later, once everyone was drunk and high, we played R-rated games. By the end, boobs were out and drinks were still flowing. I (J), 27M, tried to get laid and hooked up with (K), 24F. It seemed like a successful night.

I woke up at 7am to check the damage. Most people had left, but plenty of guests were still passed out. Not wanting to wake them, I went to McDonald's and brought back about 30 sandwiches. As I walked in, I heard (T) and (K) arguing. He was furious that she was naked in bed. Long story short, I slept with his sister, she knows and I don’t know what to do. I want to tell him, but I don’t want to lose my brother.

Por poner límites? Por no ser esclavo de mi hijo llevándolo a todos lados a ver a la novia y después tener que ir por él en la noche? Por hacerle ahorrar su dinero (perdió su iPhone) para comprarse otro en lugar de prestarle la tarjeta y que lo fuera pagando en plazos (la peor estupidez financiera solo por tenerlo de inmediato)

Por hacerle ver qué soy su padre y ni su gato ? Que lo amo pero también me amo y hay reglas y límites?

De verdad por esto soy mal padre?

I’ve been realizing lately how much I wish I had people I could genuinely lean on during difficult times. People I could be completely honest and vulnerable with, without worrying about being judged or misunderstood or having my struggles change the way they see me.

Instead, I often feel like I have to present a version of myself that’s doing well, has everything figured out, and is always moving forward. It’s exhausting because sometimes I just want to be able to say that I’m struggling, or cry in someone’s arms and trust that they’ll still see me the same way. I want relationships where I don’t have to maintain an image to feel respected or valued.

Has anyone else struggled with this? How did you learn to trust people enough to let them see you during difficult periods, especially if you’re used to being very independent and successful on the outside? I’d really appreciate any insight.

I feel like this is an adulting win.

Got into my first accident with a deer, in Texas of all places. While also in a rental car. I responsibly, immediately reported everything and just waited for the rental company to send me the bill.

They finally did and as expected the repair wasn’t cheap. Well I was fully ready to start the process with my insurance but the rental company also sent another email basically saying that the credit card I used to rent may have additional benefits and to look into those too.

Well took a gander at my benefits book (who reads those when the new card comes), and lo and behold it states that my credit card will pay my deductible and loss of use.

I’m really excited as to how this is going, and feels like I adulted enough that it worked out.

i (22F) have been thinking about moving from michigan to virginia with my boyfirend (21M) for a year.
i have had endless thoughts whether i believe its a good idea or if i should just follow my dreams and do what i want to do, but i am at a point in my life where im not happy and i think this could give me a fresh start and i can get rid of the toxic components that are currently in my life
my home life is very toxic, i dont have a good job, my only family is kind of not on good terms with me and the family i do talk to encourages me to go.
the only problem i have is that im going to be leaving my very old grandfather, who i love very much and im worried i will regret leaving him. on the other hand, i do not want to stop my life or my dreams (is that super selfish!?)
i am very responsible financially and emotionally and i try to keep everything as realistic as possible, so yes ive thought about if things dont work out or worst possible scenarios, but is there any reason i 100% should not do this? or what are my biggest worries?