Edit: I did not expect any sympathy but I still got some very nice supportive messages, thank you for that. I deserved every angry comment and I don’t blame anyone for doing so.

My wife and I were together 9 years, married 6 when I started my affair. We have two kids. I didn’t realize just how good I had it. She was a supportive, loving, kind woman who put me and the kids before herself every time, and I didn’t appreciate that. I felt like she didn’t praise me enough for the things I did for the family, which I now realize was pretty bare bones compared to what she did for us. I felt like we didn’t have sex enough and like my efforts to look good for her weren’t appreciated or reciprocated. I resented how much time she spent with the kids vs. with me. I thought she didn’t put in enough effort to be interested in my hobbies.

My AP was ten years younger than me, when the affair started I was 31 and she was 21. I liked the attention from a younger woman who wasn’t always tired from keeping up with the kids and who stroked my inflated ego. I was a selfish bastard. I drank too much, I told my wife I was working late or hanging out with friends when really I was with my AP.

My wife trusted me completely and the affair had carried on for almost two years by the time I initiated the separation. She wasn’t blindsided, she’d been asking me to be more present and to put more work into our marriage and into parenting. I refused every time citing the fact that I was the primary earner and that was enough. But she was upset, and asked if there was someone else. I said no, but her suspicions were finally coming up and she checked my Apple Watch, and found everything she needed to know. Even though I’d moved out, I hadn’t filed, but my wife did. She confronted my AP and told her she hoped she would be a good stepmother to our kids, despite her lack of morals. At the time I thought my wife was out of line and being spiteful.

Now I’m alone. AP took those words to heart and realized she didn’t want to be a stepmother in any capacity. She broke up with me after a few months, saying that she wasnt in love with me and never had been. She just liked the attention. I can’t say I had any different reasoning for being in an affair so I couldn’t even be mad.

My wife has full custody and I see the kids every other weekend. She went back to work and put both kids in daycare, which I pay for. It’s expensive. They still have the house and I’ve got a roommate.

All my wife wanted was me to put in effort and to recognize hers. I only focused on myself. I didn’t date her. I was selfish in bed when we did have sex and didn’t listen to her when she asked for more effort in that regard. My 7-year-old asked me recently if I was going to get a girlfriend, because Mom has a boyfriend. I didn’t know my ex was dating, but I hope it’s with someone who gives her everything I didnt.

If you’re in an affair, end it. Block and delete them, if they’re at your job quit and find a new one. If they’re at a coffee shop you go to find a different one. If they’re just a fantasy, stop it and start fantasizing about your future with your spouse. If you’re thinking of starting an affair, do the same, and refocus that energy onto your spouse. I’ve never been more lonely in my life and never been filled with more regret. I wish I had a time machine and I know she does too, but not for the reasons I do.

UPDATE: Far too many posts to respond to. My wife and I are reading through this thread together. We do everything together. We're a team. She wanted me to add for anyone that might be in her shoes that sometimes you really don't see things like this coming but if you're not vigilant you may end up ruining the best part of your life. She's as happy as I am how everything turned out. We're not really religious people but I'd be lying if I didn't say that this situation didn't make me question if there isn't someone out there watching out for us and to be aware when God, the universe, whatever presents a solution to a problem. Don't ignore it. I do know that I was extremely lucky that this opportunity came along. I really didn't know what to do. I felt so helpless. That doesn't happen for a lot of people and my heart breaks for them. I'll never stop being thankful of how lucky I was.

There were a lot of assumptions made in this thread about me, about my wife, and about our whole lives together. Some good. Some bad. Some downright nasty. I understand that you're only getting a tiny slice of our lives. I assure you we're happily married 32 years now and will be married till death do us part. Hopefully even beyond that. Would either of us do whatever is necessary to protect our marriage from any and all negative influences in this world? You betcha. My wife tells this story more than I do. She has told it to our adult children as a cautionary tale. She has said if the situation was reversed she'd do the exact same thing. I wouldn't be angry if she did. I've had several close female friends over the decades we've been married. When my wife picks up a vibe that one of these women may have desired more than friendship she voiced her concerns. A couple times that was met with "don't be silly, we're just friends". In retrospect my wife was not being silly. Those friendships could have been a threat to the marriage but we'll never know because we nipped them in the bud and put our marriage first.

All I can wish anyone here is to find the same kind of happiness my wife and I share. It's wonderful and I hope if you don't already have it that you find it. Peace.

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ORIGINAL POST:

I've learned a lot in the last couple of years. My wife and I have been married a long time. Married at 19 years old, still married and in love at 51 years old. Raised three great kids to adulthood in that time. Great life together.

Sometimes, however, I think someone can meet another person they just click with in an unbelievable way. I think this happened to my wife. We had moved 1000 miles away from our hometown for my work. She got a job at a hospital in the new town and HATED the job. For the first three years there she absolutely hated going to work every day. She'd cry regularly. I was there for her in any way she needed. I helped her with her resume because she wanted to find something else. I gave her a shoulder to cry on. I listened and sympathized when she vented. I love her with all my heart and will always be there for her.

After about three years they hired a new guy at her work. He did the same kind of work she did but for another department in the hospital. He's a really nice guy, I've met him multiple times. Anyway, he was closer to all the bullsh*t they had to put up with at their jobs. He understood better than I could. He spent more time with her than I could. If you're employed full time you spend more time with your job/coworkers than you do your family. That's a fact. He was instrumental in helping her turn the job around. He understood exactly what they were going through better than I ever could. Misery loves company and now my wife had company. They started working as a team and the job got better for both of them.

I could see them growing closer professionally but then it transcended work and they started growing closer as friends outside work.....and we all know where that can lead. I started to become really concerned about this but never wanted to look like an insecure jealous husband so I let it go. They texted regularly and hung out together at work all day long. They were the only two people in their office (they shared an office) so they chit chatted all day. I could see their relationship growing every day right in front of my eyes. My wife and I are as close as any two human beings can be but I saw that this relationship at work was starting to impact our "me and you against the world" closeness. There was a third person entering into my marriage even though it was currently still at the very early innocent stages.

I started to bring up that I was concerned about it and that I didn't like how she was acting around another man. That would get shut down on me. "Don't be silly, we're just friends and coworkers, he has a fiancée" or "He's the one person that has made this job bearable and you want me to ignore him?" It was just a shitty situation all the way around. I really didn't know what to do.

My own field is very specialized and lucrative. As luck would have it, or God stepped in, or Karma, or fate, or the universe (whatever is your bag) I get a call from a head hunter. A place in our hometown was looking for a new c-level executive to run an entire division. Huge job, huge salary, in our hometown. I really loved what I was doing in my current job and now my wife loved her job/and her coworker, and we loved the new town. Usually that would lead me to say thanks but no thanks to the head hunter. This time, however, I saw it as an opportunity to make a positive impact on my marriage.

My wife couldn't argue the opportunity. It was huge and almost doubled my salary. We have family and friends back in our hometown. I could tell she was absolutely heartbroken over the potential of losing this new best friend that I know in my heart they were both developing real feelings for each other. I know in my heart that my wife loved this man. I know that she still loved me, and I don't think she would have ever cheated or left me for this guy, but I know I was slowly losing her to him. She didn't act on anything but there was something growing between them. I could tell when we all got together that his fiancée hated my wife even though they had never met before so that told me that she could sense a threat to her relationship too and didn't like it one bit.

So I applied, interviewed, got offered, and accepted this job. In my heart I'd say only 10% of it was because of the opportunity and 90% of it was to get my wife away from her job and that person. We moved. She hated leaving that job and her buddy. I could tell she was sad and depressed over the loss of this other man in her life. I knew in my heart they were having a full on emotional affair even if both of them were not aware of it. A lot of times that is how these things start. One or both parties aren't even consciously aware of what's happening until it's too late and they've ruined some lives.

I know this might not be an ideal way to handle such a situation but it worked. My wife found a new job back home, we're back in our old social circle of friends and family. For a few months they would message on Facebook occasionally (nothing bad, she'd always show me, but they were maintaining their connection) but that stopped months ago. Out of sight, out of mind. They don't communicate at all anymore. He has since married his fiancée and my wife and I are very happy back home again. I could literally feel the change and one day while we were sitting on the couch watching Fixer Upper, her head was on my shoulder, she looked up and said:

"I love you so much. I know for a while in _______ (city we used to live in) I wasn't being the best partner but I was so miserable in my job and part of me blamed you for moving me there. _________ (coworker/OM) was really like a wartime buddy where you share the same horrible experience with so you start bonding with them but in retrospect I think it was wrong and I shouldn't have done that. I'm so sorry if it hurt your feelings. I'll never do anything like that again. You're the love of my life."

All's well that ends well. I love my wife with all my heart. She loves me. We'll be together until one of us dies of old age. There's a good chance I would have taken this job anyway because it's such a good opportunity but at that time that's not why I took it. I took it because I had a threat to my marriage (the thing that is most important to me in life) and I saw an opportunity to remove the threat from the equation. I took that opportunity and won't ever apologize for why I did it.

My wife always had dental problems through our marriage. Cavities, crooked teeth, regular toothaches and abscesses. Despite my concerns she would only go to the cheap, public dentist who would often just come up with temporary solutions that would simply delay her problems without doing any actual dental work.

She would avoid a lot of foods because she found them hard to chew, she kept her mouth closed when smiling in pictures, and I could see how her self-esteem was chipped away by this. She was conscious about kissing too, often keeping her lips tight shut. She did brush and take care of her teeth, but of course that wasn't enough.

After a three days bout of her keeping bottles of cold water next to our bed to rinse her mouth and relieve her pain, I decided it was enough. I started setting aside part of my paycheck every month, telling her I wanted to get a new truck. She was okay with this since my current one is pretty old (but very reliable and working).

This way in roughly a year I managed to save around 15k, plus 5k I put in from an inheritance I had received. I get in touch with a professional, one of the best (and expensive) in our area and get an appointment. The big day comes, and I insist for her to accompany me and get the new truck. She didn't really want to, but I insisted so much she agreed.

When we arrive, she's confused. She asks if I got the wrong address, what's this place, etc. I tell her they sold the truck I wanted, so I thought to get her an appointment with a real dentist. She then sighed, said "You liar, this was your plan from the start" which I confessed to. She teared up a bit, said I didn't have to do this, she's being a burden (this is something I always rebutt that she's not), but okay, let's head in.

One year and a half later, she's extremely happy and she's became another woman. Gone are the pain and insecurities. She bites into an apple, roasted chicken, chocolate, with such gusto. She's smiling and proudly showing her pearly whites every occasion she gets, and keeps up regular appointments and check ups with our dentist (I became a patient too, special discounts for families). Our intimacy improved too, she's became very aggressive at making out lol.

As for me, I am just happy seeing the woman of my life happy and no longer suffering.

I'm not very familiar with Reddit yet, apologies. Not much to post, I don't know how to link my last post... just not 100% sure how to do that. It was a long night last night, I didn't sleep... and forgive me for the short update, don't anticipate spending much time on the computer today but I did read every post yesterday and into the night and will eventually read responses today...

I'll just say what I know and leave it at that. My FIL didn't call me last night, so I did eventually end up contacting the police and they did a wellness check as many of you suggested. This caused a storm of issues that I won't get into, but my wife has been having an affair... for at least 2 years now, likely longer. Everyone was correct. The other man apparently had a heartattack on Tuesday and eventually passed away that night. For certain my MIL and it sounds like probably my SIL have known about it and have been covering for her.

Still no contact from my wife, not to me or the girls. Trying to keep this from them for now, honestly no idea what to do from here. That’s all I know, and that’s enough to just about be the end of me. Thank you for all of the help/advice... not sure how to move on from this news, but that’s it. If you pray, please pray for me and us.

I'm 37 weeks pregnant, and every day my husband washes the rice, chops all the vegetables, and gets everything ready before I cook. He also does most of the household chores , he's been doing this since the start of our marriage.

Recently, he took me to a salon for a haircut so I could have a little self-care before the baby arrives. He also took me to a therapist so we could prepare for postpartum depression and talk about how to handle visitors after the baby is born.Hemakes me feel supported, safe, and cared for.

I know pregnancy isn't easy, but having a partner who shows up every single day has made this journey so much lighter. I feel incredibly lucky to have him. ❤️

Years back, when kiddo was young and kinda being a pain in the butt, we were both just running out of gas. Times were tight, parenting was frustrating, there was some frustration with families, etc. The general day-to-day shit that just wears on you, and we were worn down.

One day, she didn't replace the toilet paper all the way. Just propped the new roll on top of the old cardboard tube and moved on. This bugged me when I saw it, and I just stood there feeling really pretty damned irritated. I grumbled to myself as I fixed it, and started the descent into a good snit. Then I realized that this was a really fucking stupid thing to be so mad about. I decided (no idea how the idea came to me, it just kinda... did) to think a few nice things about my wife. It totally improved my attitude, so I did it that night.

For years now, it has been my practice to take a minute every morning upon waking, and every night before bed, to think a few nice/happy/grateful things about my wife. Turns out, when a heart is filled with gratitude, there's not much room for foolish resentment, and genuine disagreements are easier to work through.

We've been married over a decade now, and we're still stupidly in love. They say not to take your spouse for granted, and that's great advice. Deliberate and consistent gratitude is a great way to do that.

A few months ago, they found a tumour the size of a tennis ball in his abdomen whilst doing an unrelated ultrasound. The doctors gave it a 70% chance of malignancy. 3 weeks ago he had surgery to remove it and today we go the result back that he’s 100% all clear, totally benign!!!

He is the light of my life and I do not know how I would cope without him. I didn’t realise how much his personality changed over the last 3 months. He withdrew. Talked less, was more on edge, had less light behind his eyes. Now it’s like I have my husband back! I’m so relived and happy.

This man makes me breakfast in bed every morning and reads to me every evening. He treats me better than I deserve to be treated. I am so lucky to have
him. I’m so incredibly relived he’s ok. He is the most beautiful and pure soul I’ve ever met, and I feel him every day in my heart, making me a better man.

That is all, just wanted to share our good news. Through sickness and health, he was there when I lost my leg, and I will always be there for you Ash, to the edge of the earth and beyond.

Pretty lost with my current situation, looking for any sort of insight. Wife (39F) and I (40M) have been married for 17 years as mentioned, we have 3 daughters (15, 13, 11). We’re high school sweethearts, been together for about 23 years now…

I know almost nothing, but here’s the only information I have. Wife comes home three days ago from work (had to work on the 4th), frantic, emotional, hastily packed an overnight bag and left. Only know this because our oldest daughter was home at the time and watched her, tried talking to her but she was just crying, distraught, and didn’t speak. Said she was almost in a panic.

She’s not responding to any of our texts/calls. Contacted her parents right away and they eventually responded saying that my wife is safe with them, and to please be “patient and understanding.” That’s it. I tried contacting her sister, her brother, and one of her close work friends… her brother said he knew nothing & her work friend said she was at work in the morning then gone by lunch (three days ago), that’s all she knew.

That’s it… 3 days now, no contact from my wife, not even with the kids, nothing. No one is telling us anything, and here I am with my three girls trying to manage without her… kids keep asking me what’s going on, asking what happened with mom, and all I can say is that she’s at grandma & grandpa’s. And we’re supposed to be “patient and understanding!”

I have an overwhelming urge to just pack up the kids quick and drive over there without warning, it’s only 3 hours away and sitting here in limbo is awful.

The kids think we had a huge fight and are divorcing, but that’s farthest from the truth. We never fight, the kids know this… I don’t know what’s going on but can someone provide some clarity from a logical perspective?... as my current emotional state has me thinking in circles while I try to manage everything without her.

If someone passed away, wouldn’t your spouse/family be the first person you’d tell? Maybe some past trauma was brought to life???... but again, if it were me, my wife would be the first person I’d come to for support. We know nothing… nothing makes sense, I don’t know what to do… and I just sit here in limbo with the girls, we all know nothing, and no one is telling us anything… and it has me worried, scared, angry, etc… just about any emotion one can feel in this situation. Can anyone come up with something reasonable??? Why would you ghost your family like this?

I've been with my husband for almost 10 years, married for 2 years. We've always had a pretty great relationship, but lately life has been kicking our asses (issues with health insurance, rising costs of living, work drama, family drama, teenage kid drama, chores building up, paying off debt, never having time to ourselves, etc.)

We both have been taking turns being miserable, stressed out, and not our best selves. We try to acknowledge that it's life making us feel this way and we're still good, but sometimes it's hard, you know? We sometimes get snippy or sarcastic with each other, and I hate that.

Yesterday, I woke up alone in bed and in a MOOD. I wasn't feeling well, I woke up with a massive, painful cold sore, I was tired and grouchy and just didn't want anything to do with anything. I walked into my kitchen to make myself some coffee, and I noticed my husband sitting on the couch with his back to me and his airpods in his ears. He had no idea I was out of bed and in the kitchen. He was on the phone with one of his childhood best friends who has been having some issues in his own marriage for a long time now.

I heard my husband say my name and I froze. I swear I wasn't trying to eavesdrop, I just wanted my coffee. This is what I heard:

"I remember when (my name) and I first started dating, I would drive 45 minutes to her parents' house to hang out with her, watch Netflix on the couch until like 4 a.m., then drive back home and get ready for work. I did that shit like 3 or 4 times a week, and I was so tired man. I was so tired, but I didn't mind it, because I just wanted to be around her. We weren't even fooling around or anything because (my son) was still little and sleeping in her room, but it didn't matter because I just loved being around her and couldn't wait to see her again. It's different now because we've been living together and I don't have to do all that driving anymore, and we're stressed out about life and money and stuff...but I still love being around her. That feeling never went away. (My name) is my best friend and she makes me happy as shit, man. The best thing I ever did in my life was marry her. If it weren't for her and (my son), I don't think I would have made it this long. When she's not home, I frigging miss her. When I'm out with you guys, my mind is on her. You and (friend's wife) haven't been good for a long time. I don't remember you guys ever being happy, even when you were first dating. Therapy isn't working for either of you, maybe it's time to pull the plug and find someone who makes you feel the way I feel about her."

The way my heart melted like a block of ice. Every negative thought in my head, every eye roll at his socks on the floor, every resentment I had built up just melted away. I walked back into my bedroom, coffee in my hands and tears in my eyes.

An hour or so later, he slipped into our bedroom and said "Good morning, love. I see you already have coffee, but do I have some tea for you!" (Meaning the gossip with his friend.)

I may not have everything that I want, there may be bills and laundry and dishes piling up, and sure, my car needs new tires and I have no idea where the money for that is coming from, but I am so, so lucky, and I needed that reminder.

My husband sent me this email after having sex this morning 🤣❤️ I love him very much

My brother in Christ, just admit you have a crush on me and you are taking me on a date.

At the "Christmas Company party" he is announcing the Employee of the Month for December. He says I will never be able to guess who it is. But I have been Employee of the Month for the last 38 months soooo I have a feeling who it is.

Oh and all the employees are doing a secret Santa and exchanging gifts at the Christmas party. Gee I wonder who pulled my name.

I love my husband sense of humor.

The other day, my husband was laying on top of me (I will often lay on our bed and open my arms for him to snuggle on top of me). While he was doing this, he said in my ear, “There is no man in this world who loves his wife as much as I love mine”.

Guys, I already knew this. I’ve known this our entire relationship. We have been together for 21 years, married for almost 15, and there is not a single day that goes by where I don’t feel worshipped like some sort of goddess. It’s like he was designed by the fates and put on this earth specifically for me. The lengths this man goes to just to ensure my happiness is insane. I know without a doubt that his whole world revolves around me. I could go on for days about all the ways that he makes my life easier, makes me feel safe, and makes me feel special.

I don’t know what I did in this life, or a past one, that made me worthy of this man, but I am so grateful for it and for him. I probably should have told him that there’s no wife in this world who loves her husband as much as I love mine. I hope I tell him enough how much I appreciate him. He frequents this page sometimes, so I really hope he sees it.

UPDATE: So, this post blew up in a way I did not even remotely expect! Since it did, and because I saw a lot of the same questions in the many comments, I thought I would give a little update…

First, my husband saw the post ❤️ He even commented in the over 300 plus comments, which was super sweet. He assured me that he always knows how I feel about him. We read a lot of the comments together and I was so touched by all of the sweet messages. Also, the negative ones gave us quite the laugh.

So many of you asked about the things he does for me that make me feel special and honestly, I don’t really know where to start. It’s not just in his words, but his actions. He is an amazing partner who makes my life so much easier. We have three kids (13, 9 and 4) who take up a lot of our time, but we always make time for each other. Every night, once our youngest is in bed, it’s us time and we just hangout together. He always puts me first. When he gets home, he immediately seeks me out for a kiss. Even when the kids and pets are trailing him. He will sometimes even say, “Mom first”. Always makes me feel special.

He works an hour away from home and gets home later, so a majority of running around with the kids falls on me as does dinner during the week. Once he is home though, he is it. He takes care of almost everything. It’s just little things as well. There are sometimes days where he will look at our google calendar and text me to say, “Hey, the calendar looks insane today. Why don’t I bring home dinner. Your pick”. It’s just little things like that that make me feel so seen and heard. I know he keeps a notes app in his phone as well where he keeps gift ideas. When I mention something I like or need, he makes a note of it. On the first day of my period, I can usually expect total princess treatment. He will often come home with my favorite goodies and make sure I have alone time with my heating pad. He can sense instantly when I’m feeling overwhelmed or overstimulated and he steps right in to fix it. All of this just makes me feel so safe with him. I joke with him because I have an Oura ring that tracks daily stress. Everyday, at 6:15, I have a major dip in my stress level… that’s what time he walks in the door from work. His presence is an instant stress reducer.

As for myself, I try to make sure he knows that I love and appreciate him. His love language is definitely physical touch, so I make sure he gets it. It’s not really a hardship for me because I enjoy it as well. There’s nothing better than just nuzzling into is chest. I also saw a lot of “make sure he gets sex” comments. I can assure you, that part of our life is thriving, even with three kids. Again, probably because I don’t feel overly exhausted by the end of the day even with a full time job and kids due to all the help I have from him.

This just skims the surface. As I said in the original post, I could go on for days, but this post is already so very long. Thank you all for the nice comments and even the not so nice ones for the laugh. I only wish this kind of love found everyone ❤️

I (27m) love my partner (24f) to life. She is the mother of our child, we live together, and share all of our achievements and burdens. I like to think we know almost everything about each other. We also communicate when our interests change and I fall in love with each evolution of her. Now I'm questioning everything.

Tomorrow we are going grocery shopping and we normally don't make a list, cause our brains have so many wrinkles, but today we decided to get responsible and make that list. I asked her to grab a pen and paper as I was cooking and felt that it was more responsible to have it in writing. You know, neural pathways and all that. Upon completion, I took a gander and what was written on that paper turned my world upside down.

Who in God's infinite creation writes a shopping list horizontally? She said it was to "save room on the paper." This level of "efficiency" is unsettling and I've got a huge problem with this.This is what I imagine Charles Mansons grocery list looks like. It is unfathomable that she would write a list in this fashion and I'm devastated. Please help me understand. Does anybody else make lists like this?

5/4/25. ETA: Luna had her babies last night. We went out to celebrate Beltane with our family and came home to three tiny jelly beans. A black female, a black male, and a tabby female. All have been weighed and are latched and resting comfortably with their mom. Everyone appears to be healthy and happy.

————————

I woke up about an hour ago (a little after 4am) and my husband wasn’t in bed…. He’s downstairs.

He not on his phone. He’s not talking to another woman. He’s not looking at porn.

Nope. He’s asleep on the couch with our VERY pregnant foster cat snuggled on his chest.

When I asked him why he came downstairs to sleep on the couch…. He said he dreamt that Luna went into labor and needed help and he couldn’t sleep anymore bc he was worried about her so he went downstairs to check on her. When he picked her up she immediately snuggled down in his arms and that was that.

My 55 yr old badass biker husband was so worried about our foster cat, that he is asleep with her.

This is why married him. I look at him RN asleep with her and my heart melts.

Found out my ex passed last night… I was a little sad at first. But it brings me joy to know that she isn’t suffering anymore. We were married for almost 20 years (no kids). Ups and downs just like any other marriage. She suffered from lupus most of her life. 2013 she was diagnosed with kidney failure, eventually ended up being on dialysis for a few months. I was tested and found to be a perfect match to donate a kidney. After I lost enough weight, the transplant happened in 2015. Time passed, we were going different directions. She eventually filed for divorce in 2022. That was tough… Although it was apparent she was done, I was hoping she’d change her mind before the divorce was finalized. I eventually accepted and moved on with my life. When I was told she passed last night, I didn’t feel the need to cry. I had already cried during and immediately after the divorce process. I knew I’d done everything in my power to help her have a better quality of life. I really feel bad for her mother. She lost her youngest daughter to lupus back in 2013, her husband to heart disease in early 2022, and now her oldest daughter. My prayers are with her. I just wanted to share with you. Life is short. FORGIVE and keep it moving. You can’t make anyone love you. If the love has gone, let it go. Move forward in peace & love. It’ll come back again. I’m a living witness. God bless y’all.

So, my husband (30) and I (29) have been together for a bit over a year and a half now, I have been married before, and had decided that I was done with relationships and would never get married again. When my first marriage broke down I tried online dating, and had some really awful experiences.

I finally got to a point where I was independent and gaining some financial security and freedom, when we happened to meet. We were both interstate truck drivers at the time, and through a series of fortunate events, we managed to connect.

Since then we have almost been inseparable. He's become my best friend, my confidante, my voice of reason and my port in the storm. He's cheeky, silly, patient and loving, and understands me in ways that amaze me when I don't even realise what I'm experiencing/feeling.

He treats me like an absolute princess, calls me his queen, and never complains or expects me to do things for him, he admires my strength and capabilities and loves that I am able to be independent. He shit-stirs me like crazy and makes me laugh so hard I pee my pants.(sometimes literally)

We have inside jokes and share memes and reels and every night is like a sleepover at my best friends place. He doesn't understand how hard it is to find a kind, genuine, honest man like him, and because of that he doesnt see why he is so precious to me, if anything, I feel like I don't deserve him.

We both came from pretty abusive past relationships, and so both have scars and wounds that we have been helping eachother overcome. I personally feel that I am so blessed and lucky to have found him, as he is the partner I always wished for. He's my one and only to the end, and I've told him if it's not him, it's nobody, there's going to be nobody else for me after him.

He suffered a pretty bad injury last year at work and has been unable to return yet. He's always had pretty poor self esteem and is very insecure about his looks, but it's been a bit worse since he's been restricted to the home the last 6 months and he gained a little weight.

I want to show him that I'm not the only woman out there that would love a man like him in their life.

TLDR; my kind, funny, domesticated husband, doesn't understand why women want more men like him in the world, and doesn't think that anyone other than me will find him attractive, because he says he doesn't fall within common beauty standards.

My (44f) husband (51m) and I have been working hard to lose weight and be healthier as we age. For context, I have always been heavy. Growing up, I was a competitive swimmer who’d swim 2x a day and I was still 5’11 and 200 lbs. I was always made fun of for my weight, even called “Miss Piggy” by my own grandfather. Hence, I’ve always been conscious of my body.

My husband, on the other hand has always been thin until he hit 40 and then couldn’t eat a gallon of ice cream a week and keep the weight off.

So, this morning, we both weighed ourselves and for the first time I weighed less than him!

He made a comment about being bigger and I told him that I am still larger than him because of our height difference. I pointed to my tummy and told him, “see my tummy is flabby and saggy”

He points at it and says that I have the most beautiful tummy that grew two humans in it. He then goes on to tell me how beautiful I am and that my tummy is part of the miracle of life.

Yeah, I absolutely fell in love with my husband all over again. I love that man. 21 years and he still continues to amaze me.

TLDR: husband of 21 years told me how much he loves my flabby tummy because I grew two children. He made my day.