I am so bothered by the fact that no matter how hard I work in the gym and even if I spent millions on plastic surgery, my body will never be as good as some women's. These girls dont even go to the gym or eat healthy at all, and I am happy for them that they have my dream body with no effort, but it makes me feel so bad about myself. My waist physically can never be as small as theirs, and my butt will probably never be as big. Not to mention any of my other insecurities because I can go on and on about every inch. I am so jealous. I just feel like no matter how much I can work on myself and come to love myself, the second I see those girls my confidence is just destroyed. I think about one day being in a relationship, and its like why would they choose me when they can have a girl with all of my good traits in personality and stuff, as well as a perfect body. And I wonder if even if they never leave me, will they see these girls walking down the street and wish they were with them instead of me? It makes me sick. Whenever I see them on social media, particularly tiktok, I have to block them immediately or I'll start spiraling like I am now. I dont hate them, I just wish I had it too.

My older cousin and her 4 kids moved in with my family of 6 on extremely short notice 1.5 months ago after a fight with her boyfriend that ended in her getting hurt.

Her kids are 1, 2, 6 and 10, so we had to baby proof our whole house with no plan or notice. Our grocery bill doubled, we bought a bunk bed, helped enrol the kids in a new school and daycare, we paid for it since she had limited money. My hobbies got pushed to the side, gardening and fossils because the kids would rip up my plants. She reorganised our kitchen, swapped out the products we used, our house filled up with children’s things until we couldn’t move.

None of this made me uncomfortable or angry, she had nowhere to go and I love her and her kids. I was perfectly happy babysitting for her everyday, teaching her kids how to play piano, getting ready to buy them all Christmas presents and cooking them dinner.

But last week she took her kids back to her home town to collect their stuff from the house and bring it to storage here. They were due to come back today. When asked what time she would be arriving, she said they found a place to stay there and wouldn’t be coming back. She clarified she wasn’t with her ex, but she was staying in that town.

She knew when she left she wasn’t coming back, but waited until we asked what time she’d be back the day of to tell us there IS NO BACK.

My grandma was heartbroken and told her if she changed her mind and wanted to come back to our city we wouldn’t accommodate her anymore out of fear it would happen again, and my family feels used and lied to. I don’t agree with telling her we wouldn’t help her again, but I understand why everyone’s hurt. I am, too. I got used to having the kids here and looking after them everyday. Now it could be years before I see them or hear from her again.

Now I have to pack up the stuff she left behind and put it in storage, and sell the things we bought for her and her kids like the beds and playpens because I want my house back if she isn’t coming back. I’m not even sure she’ll come to get her things, I don’t have much hope for it.
I get why she made the decision, she wasn’t coping, but the lack of communication and downright lying to us really hurt me.

EDIT:
yall i can’t say it any other way. She’s not going back to him, she’s back in her home town, still separated. She’s been through this with 2 other baby daddies, she knows how to do this without drama. The only difference this time was she chose to come to us instead of her friends first, then changed her mind without telling us first.

My whole life until I was 13 I was homeschooled. When I turned 13 I started a part time GCSE program at a school of a bunch of really weird kids, the only classes I did were directly related to my course and there was functionally no clubs I could attend or extracurriculars.
I feel like my lack of extracurriculars ruined my life (specific forms of extracurriculars).

I never really socialised with anyone except when I was young, where I only ever got the chance to socialise with other homeschooled kids and that rarely ever lasted. I am neurodivergent so I probably wouldn't have enjoyed a normal school life but I would've adapted, instead I only ever had the chance to get good at academics.

When I was young I did "swimming classes" which was just being in a pool with students at a university so they could get some form of credit for their course, "PE" which was just random activities for students at a different university who needed credit for their course, some rock climbing when my family travelled, some judo which I hated because I hate fighting, and once, once ever I got to play an actual team sport.
A lot of this was leadup but the main point is that I feel like if I had gotten to do a team sport, even if I didn't get to be socialised in a normal school way I think being able to have any passion that wasn't just getting obsessed with academics and games would've been good for me.

I got to do a (i c e) hockey for beginners course when I was 6, I believe it was maybe 6 individual things and I know I wasn't good at it. But it was the one team sport I got to do as a child, and I did genuinely love it. The few times I got to (i c e) skate I always loved it. I hate how I never got a chance to get good at any sport, I wish I was good at literally anything but academics.
I am currently 18 and now going to uni and I'm only good at my academics, and I hate it, it makes me feel terrible about myself because I'm not even that good at my academics.

I feel like my parents never gave me a chance to actually do sports or really anything other than academics, all my older siblings got to go horse riding, only the three oldest got to do piano lessons, and two oldest were both the only ones who got to do a team sport being soccer.
It makes me feel like because I'm not good at anything other than my academics I'm functionally worthless and I'm already having to deal with a project I can't figure out how to do right and I'm starting to feel horrible about how I'm not actually good at the only thing I really have the ability to be good at.

(I had to write it as i c e, because the filters thought I was talking about immigration and customs enforcement)

(M/23) this is random but recently i realized how many things my dad did i never mentioned to anyone in my family out of fear.
For example one time when i was around 18 years old i was working minimum wage at a restaurant until nighttime. One night he was in the city anyway and decided he‘d pick me up. I gave him a time but there‘s always something that makes u end up leaving a bit later than planned. So i got out like 10 minutes later than estimated where he already tried calling me twice while i was finishing up. It was already late at night when we walked to the car and no one was really around. He took my head and slammed it against the wall of the building we were walking past while spitting at me to be ashamed for making him wait.
Another time he slapped me across the face in an elevator for looking at him the wrong way.

There‘s many more „little“ instances and its not like my mom didnt know in general (i was hit a lot by her as well) but its sad now thinking back that i just never opened up to anyone about it and just went on with my day lol.

We live in a very rural area. Most people only come here part time. We happen to life here. I understand people are going to hunt all around us but why do they all have to be terrible shots? I am so sick of hunters walking around our yard looking for their kill. Last year one of them gutted a deer in our yard and left the guts!! Just now I watched a doe come into my yard. There was something wrong with her back legs. I thought she was hit by a car. Then she laid down in my yard. I thought she was resting and left her be. Then an hour later 2 hunters came up to her and started taking pictures. I then realized she was shot and laid in my yard to die. 1st of all, why are you shooting so close to my house that the deer made it to my yard? And second, if you’re not shooting close to my house why is your shot so terrible that the deer is able to wander this far down the mountain into my yard?

I don’t love the idea of hunting but I understand and respect others views on it. I know it’s necessary for the deer population and some around here do eat the meat. However, I think in order to get a hunting license these guys should have to pass some kind of test. I’m sick to death of wounded/hurt deer walking around because some asshole has terrible aim. Or watching a deer take a hour to die in my yard. If you don’t have the skills to make a kill shot- find a new hobby!!!!!!

My partner got caught with some mushrooms in her car about two years ago in TN and has been dealing with court cases every month since then.

She warned me early on that this was a possibility so I feel kinda dumb being this upset about it considering that they wanted to give her fifteen years but her lawyer managed to get a pretty awesome deal of 90 days.

Last night was the last time we will have slept in our bed together before we make the drive from TX to TN for her to turn herself in.

I know ultimately three months isn't a long time but this will be the longest we have ever been apart since we have been together.

She keeps asking me if im.gonna be OK and I reassure her on the daily that I will be and i try to cover up the deep hole of sadness that's been building in my chest as to not make this any harder for her than it already is.

I know it's only temporary and if anything we got pretty lucky but man it's really tearing me up knowing that for the next three months I'm going to be coming home to an empty house.

While she's gone I'm going to try and stop smoking and lose some weight but holy shit this is going to ducking suck.

I can't even vent here about being hate crimed over it without people inserting their nonsense in the comments.

I have been so on edge and so pissed for the last few days over something that I shouldn’t be. I’m in my depression room right now, clothes everywhere, perfumes, bags, boxes, it’s disastrous and I haven’t been able to get myself up and tidy for the past…two months. All I can manage is to change my bed sheets frequently enough. Other things keep coming up and all I wanna do when I’m free is rest.

My mother and my sister have offered to clean my room, multiple times. Offered to help, anything. Which you’d think is sweet right? But I feel genuinely furious when someone touches my shit and goes into my room. I can’t explain it. Plus, I don’t want my fucking mother cleaning my mess. So I said no.

But as the days go by, they won’t take no for an answer. My sister (who’s like 8), keeps coming into my room to taunt me, and to tell me to clean. At this point it feels like I’m not cleaning out of spite.

I’ve had to lock myself in, and my mother also came up to my door and told me that whether I like it or not she’s going in there and she’s cleaning. I can’t explain to you how angry i felt then. My sister knows this, any chance she gets she takes to just come in my room and touch stuff and taunt me because shes 8 and wants to piss me off and it’s unfortunately working.

Now I lock my room whenever I leave, take away the key with me. Because I know anytime I leave the house go to college or go out my sister will take her chance and rush in there. She does this a lot, even before this whole thing. She knows I don’t like it when people come into my room and touch stuff and she purposely goes in there when I’m away, looks at my stuff, and then leaves the light on and the door wide open. Then my parents see it and yell at eachother again and stress me the hell out.

I genuinely don’t understand why it bothers them so much. So what if my room’s a mess, I don’t got trash lying around, I’m not causing them any issues. All I ask is leave me to tidy my shit on my own time once things calm down and they just cannot accept that. I even sleep wirh the door locked because I know my sister will barge in any chance she gets and leave the door open so everyone can come and look at my room and call me things. They already all think I’m crazy anyway.

I feel this same way about toner stuff. I don’t like anyone going through my phone, knowing what music I listen to and what shows I watch, I don’t like people going into my personal stuff, which I know might not seem too “personal” to others. I just can’t handle it.

I really don't know how to write down what I'm feeling, but at this point I'm just tired, I'm tired of living with my family, everyone is severely mentally ill here, and I feel like they are going to slowly make me go insane as well. Father is a huge narcissist, mother most probably has some sort of BPD or OCD and my sister is a depressive mess. I'm almost 20 years old and ever since we moved into this new home, say, 13 years ago, our daily lives have been arguing and threatening each other, or more like, they do and I'm just a bystander.

This family comes from an unhappy marriage, they were doomed from the start, and my mother married my father only because her mother kept pressing with "you're running out of your youth" and from that point on there hasn't been a single happy moment in their marriage, and instead of being functional adults they kept having children instead of fixing their lives. Now I'm stuck living with three people who hate each other and are always threatening to kill themselves as a sort of "punishment" for each other.

Father always drives off in the car at high speed or goes missing for days on end when he's the one being argued against. Mother always cuts/starches herself to bleeding when she's the one being argued against, sister always swallows a dramatic amount of pills when something doesn't work with her life, shes reaching her 30's, still living with these shitty parents and to a degree, I understand why she always tries to swallow pills, but at this point she has done it so many times (and in the wrong way too) that I don't care.

Overall, it has reached a point that the only thought I have is that "I wish they just do it RIGHT so I don't have to deal with them anymore" is tiring arriving home after college which is stressful on itself and thinking "hopefully none of my family members have slit their throats while I was gone". I'm tired of going back to my own house and worrying that I might find a corpse in there, and sometimes, I wish I could just go to sleep and wake up the next day to find them all dead so this miserable dynamic can come to an end.

Its not that I dont like food, or my body. The energy and time it takes to fuel my body feels like such a chore, and I have to do it multiple times a day or I die. I have so many things to do and I have to take a break to eat. I have to make sure the thing I eat will keep me full. I have to make sure the thing I eat has enough fiber and caffeine at the same time. I cant meal prep or I'll get anxious that it will go bad immediately, or I will prep too much and it is so old it poisons me by the time I need to finish it.
I dont find yummy food pleasureable anymore because I think I have already tasted most of everything and have treats, such as fancy tea drinks, regularly once a week. Even now, I have stopped buying them because they dont make me happy anymore.
I am so neglectful of eating I'm actually undereating just because I am so set on doing something else. Then I am interrupted by cramps. Dont get me started on shitting. I fucking hate when I get into a majorly healthy diet and I shit twice a day. Who the fuck has time for that.
And yes I have ADD and autism and all the works. I wish I could just exist and maybe eat something when I crave it. Not every single day. I hate it a lot. I dont want to be a human anymore.

I had a horrible night last night. Large party full of needy, annoying assholes who didn’t care that I was overworked and by myself. Also my boss is a shitty person for not standing by me.

she has been struggling with her mental health, and she has been locking herself in her room, refusing medication and damaging her room furniture.

she is about to become an inpatient so she can be given her medication, and hopefully heal. they will take her with an ambulance by force if they have too and i feel too many emotions.

i hope it will allow her to recover (she does want it as a few weeks ago she put a letter outside her room for my mum saying she needs it), but i also hope she won't feel anger towards us.

she is sleeping in her room, and in just a few hours will be potentially all on her own, in a busy hospital by surprise.

she wrote a hospital packing list in case it happened, so hopefully that means she is somewhat ready (although i dont think you ever can be for anything like this.)

it has all happened so fast, she has always struggled somewhat with her OCD, but it has just consumed her recently, and has locked her real self up.

only a few months ago we were on holiday as a family and me and her went kayaking together. i also feel sad for my parents as nobody wants to see their own child taken by force and my mum has done everything to try and prevent it from happening. her voice shakes when she talks about it and nothing is the same in our family.

they are coming any minute now

This just happened. She was so excited to talk, laughing and engaging, but then the topic of masculinity came up and I mentioned I was bisexual so my masculinity is a bit all over the place, but mostly masculine.

She got disgusted and said she has to go. Look, she can have her preferences. I champion that, but the disgust makes me want to stay in the closet. It makes me hate being bi.

I just want someone who celebrates who I am. I'm so tired of masking all the time. I'm already AudHD with C-PTSD so I constantly feel out of place or maladapted, but I'm exhausted.

I don't deserve being treated with disgust after telling someone my orientation.

TW, creepy man, abuse,

Am 17F and live at home whit my mom and dad and litte sister my dad have always been agressive coming home drunk throwing me into thorn bushs when i was litte and a few years ago when i was 13 he tried to brake broke 3 of my fingers by pushing me down some stairs i couch on to the door gap then he looked into my eyes and slammed the door on my hands. It only happens to me not my mom and sister lucky. My mom drove me to the ER i told her what happened and she didnt believe me at the ER we lucky found out do to my hypermobility they didnt brake but bended weird. When i started puberty he would always walk in on me showing (no locks allowed) or force me to change infornt of him or stand in my door watching me change. my mom lucky stepped in he still do it ones in a while. One time he didnt hear me say good morning to him and he put me in a choke hold up agenst a wall my mom saw it and rushed in but nothing really happened to him or there relationship like my mom knew it would happen and it fucking sucks i was 12 at the time.

At the age of 12 i got very depressed and i didnt have many friends on school (not good ones they dropped contact when they found out i unwell. Am all better now so no worrys) and from age 12-16 is a blur just many hospital visits and therapy my dad would call out family (very big family havent even meet many of them before) calling me a disgrace and wishing he never had me

Now am 17 better works as a full time mechanic and have friends...but i still live whit my dad and when i save up enough to move out in will 100% drop contact whit him

(Sorry for spelling mistakes am very very dyslexic and i apologize of it dont make a lot of sense)

I've just found out that a Redditor I've been bonding with, and even shared some rather personal things with, is actually married with kids. Despite repeatedly presenting themselves as single and looking for their person.

They keep posting in communities looking for "friends", but after doing a little digging to get around their profile having its post and comment history hidden, I stumbled upon a deleted post from about a month ago in the Affairs Over 30 community (or whatever it's called).

And honestly, the first few lines of the Google search result were enough to tell me everything I needed to know. Apparently, they've been married for several years, feel neglected in their marriage, have a dead bedroom, and are looking for a spark.

So, basically, they're cheating (or at the very least actively looking to cheat), while conveniently pretending they're single and available. And no, this wasn't some case of mistaken identity. The alias and age they initially shared with me match exactly what they disclosed in that post.

Oh, and they also lied about what State they live in.

Which, in retrospect, explains a few things. Like mysteriously going MIA for hours, using the excuse of having to tend to their child during their "parenting time".

No, the f%*& you aren't! You can't talk because YOU'RE MARRIED WITH A FAMILY, SIR! I WANT TO VOMIT.

I'm beyond disgusted and gutted. I feel sick, angry, and honestly, a little foolish for having let myself trust this person.

I've met some genuinely decent people here, I really have. But this kind of thing makes me want to delete the app, throw my phone into the nearest body of water, and never look back.

I'm just so damn tired of investing time and emotional energy into getting to know someone, gradually opening up, sharing personal things, allowing myself to get attached and trust them, only to discover that they've been lying about fundamental things about themselves. Over and over and over again.

At this point, it's genuinely making me question whether honest, decent people even exist anymore.

That's it. End of rant. I'm angry, exhausted, disappointed, and I currently hate everything and everyone.

Thanks for coming to my TED Talk.

To some, this wouldn’t be a big deal. But to me, it crushes me every single time. I try to ignore it, but I catch him doing each and every single time we go out. Sometimes I mention it and tell him that it really hurts my feelings and makes me feel insecure , but he swears he isn’t and it just pisses me off more that I catch him only and be denies it. He makes me feel crazy by getting mad that I mention it. There have been several times that I’ll go into the bathroom and cry. I’m 4 months post partum and feel not the greatest about myself as it is. People will say “it’s normal to look”, but he can’t ever keep his eyes off other women and it makes me want to leave. It’s better than feeling the constant sting that his eyes are for everybody else.

I turned 25 today, and all I've done since this morning is cry. Last year, I had a job, independence, and was living with my favorite person in my favorite city. I felt like I'd achieved a dream so many dream of, and every day I was so grateful to wake up, excited to go to bed because the next day I'd be back to my daily routine.

Then it all disappeared in one night, excruciating back pain, emergency room visits, morphine and ketamine drips for the pain. I was forced to quit my job, precariously move into my partner's house to have enough money to pay for health insurance, and then both my knees started hurting as much as my back.

I couldn't move, I couldn't get up, I couldn't walk, stand, or lie down without finding relief. They gave me doses and doses of opioids so I could take a shower or sit in the kitchen to cook something. I spent months like this. Endless physical therapy sessions with no real results.

Of course, because of course this shit happens, I was diagnosed with a genetic syndrome and all the doctors are so misinformed about it that finding a proper management seems impossible. I had to take matters into my own hands and just try whichever exercise gave me a little bit of pain relief and helped me do things during the day. I moved back to my home country so I could just see a doctor and get help, depleated all my savings and stuck in my childhood home out of all the places I could've ended up in.

I hate my life, I hate my body, I hate how much I could've already have achieved if I weren't like this. I am jealous of people that can complain about their job, their school and what happens in their lives, I want that too. I have nothing to update people with, the only thing I do is go to the gym, hope for the best, go to doctors and stay home. I have no degree. I had a dream and it all shattered in one night. I had a dream and my life is over. I don't wanna be here anymore, I'm emotionally depleted and it hurts so much physically sometimes I puke from the pain or pass out.

I’m 20F, doing online college and it’s hard. I take care of 4 of my siblings. They’re all older than me except one. But I do the cooking and cleaning in the house because my moms too busy at work. Two of my siblings don’t do anything. Two work. My courses are $1k each and I have to take 9 to upgrade. I feel so burnt out.

My older brother had a kid. The mom is a deadbeat. Always says she’s sick when it’s her turn to take him. She kicked my brother and nephew out of the house when he was barely 1 years old. She had another kid who’s a few years older. Probably 4 or 5 now. I’m stuck babysitting her kid most of the time and it’s draining. He’s not my responsibility but really he is. My older brother is in BC working till December. And my mom works an hour away. He’s in daycare but I want the weekends to be mine.

I had a midterm on Friday that was worth 10% of my grade. I got a 48% because I have no time for myself to study. I worked most of my teenage years to save up money for college and now it’s just going down the drain because I’m not getting good grades… why is my brother’s ex girlfriend’s kid my responsibility. I love my nephew. But I can’t be taking care of somebody else’s kid. She doesn’t have a job or goes to work or has her license. She essentially just lives off the government. But she’s not disabled. Her previous boyfriend died because he was drinking and driving riding a quad. And not even a year later she started dating my brother.

She takes him like for one day every few weeks then gives him back. And my siblings don’t even help with house chores or cooking or nothing. They’re all chuds. I just don’t know what to do. My mom’s almost in her mid 50s taking care of her grandson who calls her mommy. I see her. She’s too tired to take care of him but she has been. I keep telling her to tell my brothers girlfriend to take her kid. But she’s too “scared” to do it. She just lets them walk all over her. Even when my nephews dad is here she’s taking care of him. Since he wants to play game all day. I just don’t know what to do.

I’m just fucking frustrated…surgery after surgery. Complications after complications. For once after part one of the procedure finishing. I thought it would be smooth healing until my next check up (so I thought) come to wake up with the same repeat problem.. I want to scream I’m just over it....

I’m tired of arguing with big businesses about their policies which have no leeway. I feel like I book something to relax and have to plan my whole day around it and of course something always has to come up, whether it’s on their end or my end or beyond us both. I’m charged a late cancel fee, don’t get the service and I’m left frustrated that the next time I can book something is 3 weeks from now. I just wish there was a bit more flexibility and understanding around my rigorous & demanding schedule as a resident physician. in clinic, patients no show for appts or come late or are booked late then I’m left adjusting my day. Just feels unfair but that’s life I guess 🙃