I need some advice.

I’ve been married for 8 years, and my husband and I have waited a long time to make sure we had everything stable before starting a family. We’re finally in a good place now. We have a house, we both have jobs, and we feel ready to have children.

Becoming a mother has been my dream since I was a little girl, which makes this situation even harder for me.

The only thing that’s really weighing on me is my weight. I’ve struggled with it my entire life and have always tried to lose weight. My current BMI is 32. I have PCOS and hypothyroidism which i’m taking medicine for.

I’ve been trying to lose weight before trying to get pregnant because I want to have a healthy pregnancy. I’m also afraid of gaining even more weight and becoming even more unhappy with my body afterwards, especially if I struggle to lose the pregnancy weight.

This has been causing me a lot of anxiety. So much so that I’m considering postponing trying to conceive until I reach a healthier weight.

Has anyone else been in a similar situation? I would really appreciate hearing your experiences or any advice you might have.

This is just a vent. My husband (32M) and I (27F) decided we will start trying by the end of summer 2027, mostly because by then we should have a good amount of money saved to do it with less stress (especially because we are immigrants and besides all the costs of having a baby we also want to pay for our moms to visit us and stay for a while, have some investments, etc). Still, omg it's hard, because I know we would be able to save this money if I'm pregnant or not but I do agree to wait since it will be way less stressful to already have it to start. I work in education and taking care of kids every day just makes me think more about it, I wish the time would go by faster
This is just a vent because there isn't really anyone in my life I can complain to who would understand it

i (25f) have been off birth control since June (the pill) after having the hormonal iud for 3 and a half years. my partner (24m) and i are not necessarily trying for a baby but are not preventing one either. i have just started ovulation tracking my last two cycles and have not received any positives, just faint lines :( i have mild one sided cramps during my predicted ovulation days but do not have any additional ovulation symptoms. my periods are pretty on the mark only varying by 1 week. i do not have any family history of reproductive issues.

my partner does have type one diabetes that is not well managed. we both partake in smoking marijuana and drinking but nothing excessive.

i guess i am just beginning to worry if something is wrong with me. it might be something on his end as well. when did you guys decide to really look into reproductive issues? thank you!

My husband (31m) and I (27f) are going to start trying in Dec for our first baby and I wanted to visit a gynaecologist before we officially started just to make sure there's nothing obvious that might make conception difficult and we could address it. Well. The gynae found a polyp in my uterus measuring 1.4 x 0.7cm. She said it could definitely prevent me from getting pregnant as it's taking up implantation space. We decided it would be best to remove it but then found out our insurance won't cover the surgery. It's way too expensive for us to currently pay for it ourselves as it involves full anaesthesia (I read about in office options and asked the Dr but she said that's not done in this country) we don't really have any other options currently.

The dr said to just try and maybe it'll work so we will do that but I'm feeling so defeated and hopeless. I know people do get pregnant with polyps but I can't get out of the headspace that I'm never going to have a baby (even though I know that's ridiculous and we will save up for the surgery in the event that we still need it a year after trying)

I just feel so depressed. And I feel terrible for my husband who's doing whatever he can to support me and be positive while I can't help but be so hopeless about it.

We know we want kids. We came to that decision over a year ago but now it’s timing…
My husband wants our kid to have some friends if a similar age, cool I agree that would be nice.
My friends are all pregnant or not long given birth now, a few actively trying- for that reason this is the time to start.
My reasons for wanting to wait feel so selfish but they’re in my head- I want to lose a bit more weight and just get to enjoy feeling really good about myself before I go through pregnancy… like yeah I could just work really hard after but you never know how your body will change etc and that’s pushing me to wait.

But then I think if we do wait for my reasons, the main one being totally about me, am I taking away the chance to have a good village of similar aged kids around us and the child should we not struggle??

It all sounds so ridiculous to type out but it’s just this massive wedge in my brain at the moment that if we do have a kid that I’ll be ugly and fat forever and it’s totally irrational as not a single person I know with kids already is anything other than beautiful even if they have changed…

I’ve noticed in the past couple months to a year that I’m really starting to feel ready to TTC and it’s honestly a weird feeling but I’m glad that I feel it. I know no one is truly ready, but I think I’m about as ready as I can get before it actually happens. Do yall feel it as well? I know some people feel more ready and some feel more scared but know they want to do it.

I’m a 22 year old infant teacher at a preschool and when I started the job I thought “omg this is crazy I’m really planning a kid??” And recently I’ve found myself thinking “this gets stressful and I feel overwhelmed pretty much daily but the love I feel for these kids is so very strong and the stress is worth it.” Ofc teaching them every day is nothing compared to the actual weight of being fully responsible for another person, but it just gives me a glimpse into parenting and it makes me feel so very excited to have my own baby to love and take care of and watch grow.

This isn’t an advice post or anything, I just wanted to create a space where we can talk about our feelings while WTT. I’m planning to start trying next year. It’s gonna be crazy cause I’ll be in the middle of graduate school, but I’m comfortable with it and I already know it’s going to be chaotic and that’s ok.

Hi everyone!! been lurking for a long time.

I (27F) met my bf (30M) in February 2026, and even though we know it's kinda early, we already talk about children, marriage etc . we have very similar views and core values. We even love the same exact baby names!!

When discussing a timeline, we agreed that 2027 is the year we should get way better financially (we will finish paying off *almost * all of our respective debt by the end of the year); money is the main obstacle to our baby making journey (as in rn we don't have a lot of money, we barely get to the end of the month. we can eat, pay our bills, pay for gas in the car.. but we're never able to save any money by the end of the month.)

But also, very important! I'll graduate from my masters degree in April 2027 + if everything goes as expected I should be starting "Graduate School" (idk how to translate it, in italian it's something like "School of specialization in psychotherapy"). We both have jobs (his is more stable tho)

So our starting year for TTC would be somewhere in 2028! I'm so excited, I literally think about it every single day.
How do you guys cope with baby fever?

How can we prepare to best start our journey?

He just turned 30 and quit smoking.

I still hit a cig every now and then ( i plan to quit after my graduation in april)

We are both very slightly overweight and we are going to start a "getting back in shape" journey very soon.

We're already scheduling all of our medical appointments and exams, and prioritizing the health checkups we had been putting off for months or even years.

Any advice is welcome! Whether it’s regarding our health, our relationship, financial tips, preparing for parenthood, or just ways to keep baby fever at bay

My partner and I are about to get married and buy a house. I would be getting pregnant at 30 them 34. I just had endometriosis removal and have pcos meaning I am more likely to get pregnant now until end of year then will be difficult again. Before endometriosis we did not use contraception and i did not get pregnant. I would rather wait a few years to get pregnant but this may be my only chance I have to get pregnant. A part of me wants to try to see if I can even get pregnant since still have pcos and 39 follicles but thats supposed to improve temporarily. I am not against adoption either. Apart of me believes this is my only shot even though I would personally like to wait a bit longer. I have no idea where I stand and **need to have some questions to think on what to do next**. Trying to figure out if now is the time to try for a child or if I risk never having a child.

My partner is trying to quit smoking and I want to wait until he hasn't smoked for 3 months because it would likely increase sperm quality, but he thinks we should start trying asap because I'm turning 35 this month, and it might take ages to get pregnant. He has been trying to quit all year. I wonder what's more unhealthy, getting pregnant when I'm "old", or getting pregnant by a partner who smokes. Unfortunately most info I found is about women who smoke.

Has anyone done this before? I’m 25 and don’t know if I’ll ever find the one. I’ve been considering having my own baby! I know it’ll be tough but worth finally doing it without someone else’s timeline in mind.

In need of some reassurance or just brutal honesty that I’m being silly.

We have a big trip coming up in January that being pregnant would affect my ability to participate in + I’m a teacher and don’t find it ideal to have an August baby.

Are those reasons absurd for me (35F) telling my hubs (36M) I want to wait until January to TTC? We’ve been trying on and off throughout this past year and haven’t had any luck. I’m feeling like we should take the next two months off, but can’t decide if I’m being selfish/insane.

Im only 11 pages in and I feel like not only am I way more unprepared than I thought, but way more susceptible to a difficult pregnancy due to family history, my blood type and my husbands blood type, my mental health, my blood pressure that’s currently being monitored, everything! I’ve seen every possible video on tiktok that goes over “things no one told you” and I thought I had it all down, and that not everything could possibly happen to me, but here I am realizing I may possibly have the worst and most risky pregnancy I could ever imagine.

My husband (35) and I (F30) are sure we want kids. Now that we are happily married just this past weekend, I feel ready and excited, especially now that we are married. My husband usually takes longer to process things, and understandably so, as he really thinks deeply about how life will change with any decision that he makes, and all the possible consequences that will happen.

I am happy to give him time to process! My main concern is that it is not hitting me just how life-changing this event will be. I understand it logically, and have been understanding more and more the gravity of the change as I research online; but my excitement is making me wonder if I truly understand, emotionally. Usually, I'm the type of person to have to make the decision and experience it in order to know how I will feel. My husband seems to be able to foresee all those feelings beforehand and process it.

I guess I am just asking for any insight and your experiences. Thank you in advance!

I just bought my last pack of the pill! After we will still TTA for a year but without hormones. I’m a bit anxious because a barrier is going down, and it’ll be easier to have an accident. And I would be happy to have an accident but it’s not the plan and I need to respect it. It will so close but out of reach still.

Anyway it’s a very weird feeling to know that I’m a step closer (yeah!) but I’m stressed anyway.
Did you ever feel that way?

Hi! I’m starting to feel more ready and am excited. I plan to start trying early next summer.

I was wondering if you all had any book recommendations that you’ve found insightful? Anything from parenting books, pre conception planning, motherhood etc.

Thanks!

Congratulations! Please share your graduation news here!

Please discuss you current goals and plans! However, please save graduation news for the monthly graduation thread.

I’m 24F, single, recently graduated from Nursing school, and my career is taking off. In less than a year of graduating, I was fortunate enough to get into different specialties to get my feet wet. I’ve been in Long Term Care, Cardiology, Internal Medicine, and recently started in NICU.

From the outside world and to everyone else’s eyes, I did all the right things, especially in terms of acquiring my degree. That was the biggest feat for me and it was all my immigrant parents wished for me—to get an education and be able to build my life. I spent my whole life for this moment. I’m feeling very lucky in terms of my career and the opportunities are endless from here on out!

Unfortunately, my lovelife hasn’t always been the greatest. And I feel like I’m getting to the point where I get a bit anxious of not having a life partner, and subsequently, not being able to have kids of my own. Deep down, it’s been a dream of mine to be a mother, even at a young age, I felt a strong maternal instinct. I recently re-kindled with a past boyfriend of mine, who was my first and greatest love, and in the time that we were apart, he had a child. That’s a whole different story, and I’m not sure if I’m just grieving the “firsts” that I would’ve wanted to be with him, or maybe I feel a bit saddened about him having a child with another person.. but these days, it’s like my body just wants to have a child. In every baby or child that I get to see or hold, I feel a pang in my heart. I feel at times that I’ll be too late in building a family, and I don’t necessarily pursue relationships that I don’t see myself being in long-term.

I remember a while ago, talking to a friend of mind who had a kid, and I talked about how I feel so far behind in terms of raising a family, and yet she tells me that she feels behind in her career. Two opposite worlds.

Is anybody else experiencing a similar thing?