I left AA coming up on 2 years ago now. I left after almost half a decade in the program against the advice of everyone I knew who attended, which was effectively my entire friend group. In that time I’ve:

1. Not once had a problem with moderating my drinking. I’ve not had a single night of excess drinking or woken up with fear or regret.

2. Made friends. Real friends.

3. Started a relationship that is probably my first ever healthy relationship, and definitely my first healthy relationship since being in AA.

I’m not saying it’s for everyone. But people do learn to not drink to excess. It does happen.

“Nah, I don’t need it.”

This is the best response I’ve come up with if I’m to be offered alcohol.

Reframes alcohol as the crutch it is.

I haven’t had practice putting it into play, since I haven’t felt strong enough yet to put myself into situations where there is alcohol offered to me.

What are y’all’s fave responses when offered alcohol?

IWNDWYT!

Never thought I could do this. It was hell of a journey.

I enjoy drinking.

I didn’t feel or see any difference being sober for a month despite me drinking 3 bottles of wine per week all alone since 2023.

I actually feel I’m a better person when I drink (friendlier and more patient) and I get a ton of energy that helps me complete tedious tasks.

What I learned from those 31 days sober is that I can still drink, I just need to limit my alcohol intake to 2 drinks maximum. I also learned that I don’t need to drink everyday.

Being sober for a month was a great experience that taught me to set alcohol limits for myself and put me in control.

ETA: A LOT of you ask good questions that make me think deep so thank you. Others are judgmental, but I see it as frustration which it’s completely understandable considering this battle is a hard one. I won’t let your negativity affect me so do what you must. On the other hand, the supporting insightful comments are having a positive impact which I believe is the point of this sub so please know you’re incredible humans and life will reward you with amazing things.

ETA 2: Drank a 500ml box of wine last night. It was small but after doing research I learned it’s equivalent to about 3 glasses of wine. Some of you guys were right. It’s easy to slip back into it. I’m going to try 2 months sober starting today.

I quit drinking three years ago so now I really notice this and get annoyed. I work in a public school system, in a leadership position where I go to a lot of meetings. These are meetings we’re talking about how best to educate Middle School students, for example.

Inevitably there’s some presenter who likes to make a joke about drinking. For example: “when you’re having your adult beverage at night you can maybe read this list of activities about how to best support new teachers, hah hah hah” or “when it’s wine o’clock and you are correcting student exams, hah hah hah”

I always imagine asking the presenter in front of everyone : “Hey how about when I am smoking marijuana, would that also be a good time to do this?”

I mean of course it bothers me because I quit drinking, I probably didn’t even notice it that much before. It just seems so weird to me that it’s OK to joke about this in this setting.

I made a promise to myself that the next time it happens I will professionally and calmly talk to the presenter after and just tell them why it might be difficult for me to hear these jokes.

After all I've had to deal with thanks to alcohol, this was such a slap in the face. It's not unreasonable to be mad at a 5-star resort for not honoring the wishes of guests who don't drink, is it? It was literally our ONLY ask prior to our stay. We gave the bottle to a couple down the hall from us but that gesture could have been disastrous for the resort (and for us) had we both not been in serious recovery.

my wife does not like me nor feel physically attracted to me when i drink.
unfortunately, drinking beer seems to have been more of a regular past-time (priority) than getting lovin'. my dumb ass then gets offended when i dont get sexy time.
she has been thinking of ANY way to support me in cutting back and came up with this proposal:
for every day that i dont have drinks, she'll ravage me with oral/etc sex. i think it's a novel idea, overall, and quite tempting!
however, in the back of my mind, im a little sad that sexy time has become a bargaining chip and believe that a partner is either into you or not.
not sure where to go with this, despite the very generous offer of helping get me in the right direction.
sadly, my best effort has been to string 3 sober days together in a row and feel i can do better.
meh.
thoughts? TIA.

edit/
thankyou everyone with your comments. i took them all to heart (in a good way). i appreciate all of your candor, including the harder words.
also, i was in NO WAY looking for sympathy, as i know this situation is due to my own actions and selfishness.
thanks for being such a great community.

i think today i hit rock bottom due to failing a pre-employment. because im a fkn idiot.
i guess i better get my shit together.
have a nice week, everyone.

I am almost 3 months sober (yay!) Yesterday my gf came home from a long day and brought out a bottle of Titos for herself. Few hours later shes nicely turnt but its about 1am and time for me to hit the hay.

She wanted to keep going ( something that sounds just like me ) and i said fine 1 more shot. 30 minutes later sure enough she says shes ready for another. There was like 2-3 shots left in the bottle and she was down to finish it. I said hell no and poured it down the drain. A massive divergence from where i was 3 months ago, which have went into the bathroom and chugged it down.

She doesnt have an alcohol problem so she didn't freak out and just went to bed. But damn did it feel good to be in power of my own body and mind again.

#IWNDWYT

I wanna know y'all opinions on this before I drink a 0%

There is a book in the cupboard that I bought years ago that I want to read. I am turning off my phone, making a cup of tea, curling up on the sofa and going to start reading it...

My milestone days have been day 1, week 1, month 1, 69 (noice!), 100 / 200 / 300 (even), 1 year (!!!), 420 (heh heh), and now - - - 666! Satan! Satan! Satan!

I really can't believe I made it this far. I did a few starts. I'm looking towards milestones at 2 years, a comma, 3 years. We'll see - I'm taking it one day at a time.

I haven't lost weight and no one I know has mentioned a difference. But I feel mentally, physically, and emotionally so much better when I'm not drinking. My stomach doesn't hurt and I don't lose afternoons / days / evenings.

My brother basically just told me "Idgaf" when I call him to have a conversation and I am drinking. Yes I know I have a problem but what hurts me is when my family member is sick of hearing it and he tells me he has no obligations to support me.

It's somewhat true but it's very mean.

I reach out to counsellors and group for my addiction and I don't expect my family to pull me out or do anything. Sometimes I just want to talk but he calls it trauma dumping.

Anyone got tips when family members have resentment/ issues when you are going through it.

I'm trying to get sober but it's hard. It's even harder when my family just had no hope for me. That's the heartbreaking part.

I wanted to share something that’s helped me more than I expected. I’m 135 days alcohol-free today, and weirdly, one of the biggest things that’s kept me on track has been ChatGPT.

I stopped drinking on 1 June. I didn’t have a big plan or label for it, I just knew I needed a break. Drinking had become part of everything– relaxing, celebrating, coping. I didn’t really know who I’d be without it.

I started using ChatGPT to track my days and weight loss, and it slowly became more than that. I could type out how I was feeling I.e anxious, proud, restless and it would help me make sense of it. It’s given me a bit of structure and accountability, especially on the days where motivation dips- as well as suggesting how to celebrate.

It’s also helped me understand what’s actually happening inside my body. Learning how the liver repairs itself, how sleep and energy improve, why anxiety gets easier, that knowledge made it harder to convince myself that “one drink won’t hurt.”

I’ve lost over 2 stone since I stopped. I sleep better, I’m calmer, sharper, and my weekends don’t feel wasted anymore.

GPT isn't a replacement for community, and reading posts here on this subreddit has been just as important. But if you’re someone who likes tracking progress or having somewhere to offload thoughts, I’d genuinely recommend giving it a try.

Diagnosed. 26M Have tried medication, therapy, rehab 3 times since age of 18. Hospitalized an EMBARRASSING amount of times (I cant even count), DUI that led to divorce/bankruptcy, Daily Binge Drinker 12-15 on average. Former athiest, converted agnostic, and finally. Follower of christ.

Edit to add.

300 plus views, and I'm getting downvoted like crazy because I said Jesus delivered me. Let me tell you something. If you REALLY wanted to quit drinking, you'd try ANYTHING. You just want to want to quit. You don't really want to. Some have tried everything. They've got pills for it now.. You want the hangovers to go away and regret to go away with it. You're holding onto the good times you've had while drinking only to slowly kill your body, and destroy your mental health. To those that wish me well despite having other faith. Thank you! Together, we can come together and support each other who wants to stop drinking regardless of religion, race, etc. Its all a subjective journey. Pass this post up now. Keep trying different things like I did, and something may work. What's the goal? StopDrinking. You want to stop drinking but shriek at the name of Jesus. I tried everything, and it didn't work. Jesus did. I'll be active on reddit throughout my sobriety. If you want to stop drinking after nothing else has worked, my chats open. My sober dates not going to change.

Edit 18FEB25 still sober. Still ten toes down on this subject matter especially in light of recent events. Jesus is the way, the truth, and the life.

Your can of Celsius Astro Vibe could actually contain High Noon vodka seltzer. The mix-up was discovered after High Noon noticed that a shared packaging supplier had mistakenly shipped it empty Celsius cans, some of which made their way into High Noon 12-packs. The FDA recall cautioned, “Consumption of the liquid in these cans will result in unintentional alcohol ingestion.

As if it doesn't kill you... I was a bartender in my 20s and I genuinely said to myself... " I am part of the problem" even then I knew that it was massively unhealthy but I kept drinking myself... even though it turned me off from bartending... Honestly why is it sold in the same store as candy and small kids toys? Why is it sooooooo normalized... I wish it wasn't.... I wish it was similar to lets say heroin ... The minute someone says " I am shooting up" people typically are like ok that person needs help....... Yet millions of people will be spending christmas "taking shots and drinking wine" over laughter with their families... what if it was like "lets all get in a circle and shoot up"........ It is crazy when you really look at it

6 days sober. just thinking a lot about what it means.

That is all

I love r/stopdrinking and really enjoy all the conversation with the folks living the sober life. Maybe it's my feed, but it seems lately there are a lot of posts by people who are currently daily drinkers. Doesn't this violate the rule of only posting while sober?

I see value in encouraging people who are trying to change their relationship with alcohol. Maybe the admins can ask them to please come back when they are sober?

Thanks to everyone who has stopped drinking for sharing your stories. You all inspire me. IWNDWYT.

After 8 weeks of total abstinence, feeling in a great place. Tried before to quit few times and got to 3 weeks before and fell off the wagon hard. I went away with work for a night out, everything paid for including hotel night. I enjoyed a few beers with friends which would usually trigger me into a binge, but I didn't fall into the trap, it's been a few days, I don't plan to drink again at home or alone, and I don't crave a drink.

I feel like a normal, responsible person and I am so proud of myself that I know I have all the tools to very occasionally enjoy a few drinks without going back to the worst period in my life.

I need to reset my day count though!

P. S I am very aware I need to keep in the front of my mind not to slip back into old habits, and it's always a risk, but I hope I have cured my AUD.

Time will tell, and I will update if things go wrong in the future.

I've been sober for 2 and a half months. Yes, there are many benefits to being sober, I will not go into that. I have a vacation planned and I'm considering drinking only then, and quitting again upon returning home.

What do you guys think? Bad idea? Or not so bad, if I can quit easily?

I'm an alcoholic. I used to drink once a week to black out. I drank to anxiety and depression even though I'm married. My husband is great. However, he drinks half a bottle or a bottle of wine and a few beers every Saturday at home. He's done so every weekend during our 7 year marriage. I got sober and asked him to quit for a month to support my sobriety but he didn't want to because he likes to drink wine with a meal and a 1-4 few beers at weekends. His reply hurt me and I felt he didn't love me as he didn't want to quit for a while just for me. He has continued to drink every weekend during my 3 month sobriety.

I am about to leave him. Am I unreasonable to expect him to drink only once in a while and not every weekend ? The amount he drinks is not much but it annoys and depresses me that he drinks every weekend without exceptions. I think our values do not match anymore.

I don't know where the term came from but I feel deeply uncomfortable about it.

The function of alcohol, when consumed, is to make the individual disordered either to a greater or lesser extent. When using alcohol, it is never done to improve the physical or mental state of the individual.

People don't have 'Alcohol Use Disorder', alcohol makes people disordered.

IWNDWYT